************

(Sung to the tune of "If I Only Had A [Heart/Brain/the Nerve]":)

IF I ONLY HAD THE TIME

It's not my intention to be mean, I'd surely write this scene
And think up a good line.
I'd really make you laugh or write a sizzling scene with a bath-
If I only had the time.
I'd make Mikey with 'Kita fiddle and include an NC-17 middle:
I'd ensure things turned out fine.
I'd see to Nikita's protection and fix everything in Section-
If I only had the time.
I'd retire Ops to a place with subzero weather so Nikita and Michael could be together
And fill Section with laughter and sunshine.
Oh, the changes that you'd see in what I'd write for Season 3-
If I only had the time.

************

(This is an alternate version of 'The Wizard of Oz' tune "If I Only Had A [Heart/Brain/the Nerve]":)

HE WALKS A FINE LINE

Michael can't reveal his mind, so it's in his actions that you'll find
He equates Nikita with sunshine.
His soul is quite conflicted-and his emotions are restricted-
He walks a fine line.
Although he acts tough-and with bad guys can get rough-
His manners are divine.
Each and every day, one thought through his mind will play-
"I must make Nikita mine."
He'll risk Operation's wrath and endure any aftermath
To guarantee Nikita's fine.
He works for Nikita and Section's survival-and, as an Operative, has no rival-
But, he walks a fine line.

************

(Sung to the tune of "Ding Dong! The Witch is Dead!":)

KA-BOOM! JURGEN'S DEAD!

Ka-boom! Jurgen's dead. You know the one-that "accent" guy.
Ka-boom! Annoying Jurgen's dead.
You know-it 'makes my day'-
JIDADHWS.
Wake up the Section folks and
Let them know-
Jurgen is dead-he's gone below.
Ka-boom! Oh, HR's loved *that* sound, so!
Their eyes take on a warm, fiery glow
When they watch that scene-
Bad ol' Jurgen's dead!

*****

(Sung to the tune of "Over The Rainbow":)

OVER IN SECTION

Somewhere, over in Section, Nikita cries.
Section is a dark place Full of secret, manipulative spies.
Somewhere, inside of Section, Nikita's blue.
If you loved a man like Michael, You'd be blue, too. Someday Michael will reveal his heart and they'll get past the painful part
And the mystery of the wedding ring.
Oh, just to find out where Michael lives-what wouldn't Nikita give?
And, to be with him, she'd do anything.
Someday, maybe we'll hear-above the gunshots and explosions-
Mikey say, "'Kita, I love you-we'll be together, never fear.
If other people have found love within Section,
We will, too-never fear."

*****

(Sung to the tune of "If I Were King of the Forest":)

Mikey singing:

IF I WERE KING OF SECTION

If I were King of Section. Not Team Leader, not Valentine Op. My mission pants would be made of silk, not Lycra or plaid. I'd command every person, be it Frick or Frack, With a "Now, please," and a "Bring 'Kita back." Wearing my favorite black suit-as I passed each Operative and recruit, They would come to attention and smartly salute. I would make things right for the world AND Oversight. And I could do most anything-If I-If I-were King! Oh, what could be sweeter than ruling with 'Kita And having her wear MY ring- One day, I swear, I *shall* be King.

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