If you give a man an Uzi,
     he's going to ask for a long-range laser sight.

     When you give him the long-range laser sight,
     he'll probably ask you to stand on the far side of the room to test the range.

     When he's finished,
     he'll ask for some bullets.

     Then he'll want to look in a mirror for God knows what reason.

     When he looks into the mirror,
     he'll definitely see his hair needs a trim.

     So he'll ask you for some hedge clippers to chop off that ponytail.

     When he's finishsed chopping,
     he'll want a new bandanna to complete the look.

     He'll put on a really cool bandanna.

     He might get carried away and tie brightly colored fabric strips
     around every forehead in Section One.

     He may even end up adding some color to Ops' wardrobe as well!

     (he'll leave Madeline alone as she can give him some much needed fashion pointers)

     When he's done,
     he'll probably want to field test his new Uzi.

     You'll have to dig up a little mission for him to join you on with his new toy.

     He'll jump in the van,
     make himself comfortable,
     and buff his Uzi a few times.

     He'll probably ask you for a girl (with a certain one in mind) to
     escort him to the black-bandanna affair he has to invade.

     So you'll present him with a blonde he calls Sugar,
     and he'll ask to see the dress under her long black coat.

     When he looks at the dress,
     he'll get so excited he'll want to capture the moment.

     He'll ask for a Polaroid.

     He'll take a picture.

     When the Polaroid develops,
     he'll want to label the bottom . . .

     With a pen (one that won't explode).

     Then he'll want to hang his Polaroid on the van window.

     Which means he'll need . . .

     Scotch tape (that's hopefully not made of plastique)

     He'll hang up his Polaroid
     and sit back to admire it . . . as Michael does the same.

     Looking up at Michael will remind him that . . .
     he's on a mission.

     So . . .
     he'll ask for a silencer.

     And chances are if he asks for a silencer,
     he's going to want another Uzi to go along with it.

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