As we advanced in life it becomes more and more difficult, but in fighting the difficulties the inmost strength of the heart is developed. ~~Vincent van Gogh

The hallways had long lost all meaning to Michael as he moved down the hallway, worn from the weeks and weeks of work. He was tired and had lost the passion that he had once contained in helping those who were on the streets and the women that just needed shelter.

Administrative duties were calling him, and Michael was thankful to ease away from the therapy. It no longer held what it once had almost six years ago.

When he helped Nikita.

He didn't think about her everyday as he had when Nikita first left, but every once in a while, someone would remind Michael of her or one of the infrequent postcards would flutter into Section One, jolting Michael back to the man that he had once been.

A man that stopped everything to help one woman.

A woman that he was sure that he loved, but could never admit it.

The work that Michael had done from the time that Nikita moved in with her pappap was lackluster and had no one point that was better than the next. In time, Madeline assumed that Nikita was just something that Michael had irrationally had to do, and soon gave him the responsibility that she had tried to dangle in front of him to get him back.

Banquets. Fundraising. Dinners. Tuxedoes. That had become Michael's life of late. Feeling more like a prized trophy to be displayed to the young, single daughters of men who ran the powerful foundations, than a skilled and practiced therapist.

"Michael... Are you going out with Simone tonight?" Birkoff called out as Michael turned the corner, trying to get to his office before any of the clients would see him. It was just easier to run away than to lie.

"I broke up with her about six months ago, Birkoff," Michael stated with a bat of his eyes. He saw several girls huddled in the corner, covering their mouths, trying to hide the fact that they were talking about him. Michael rolled his head back and then sighed. He knew that he had to do something. They were down several therapists, but Michael had yet to find one that he could and would approve.

Paul had given him the final decision and Michael wanted to make sure whoever came in here would be skilled and give their all.

"Birkoff... I need the list of applicants that have made it past the application..." Michael spoke as he leaned in towards the desk. Birkoff rolled his eyes and pulled the sheet out and Michael frowned. It was in Paul's handwriting. "I was going to tell you... Paul started to make appointments for interviews today... You have one in about an hour..."

"Do you have the resume?" Michael questioned and Birkoff shuffled some papers. He couldn't grasp the concept that resumes weren't on computer disks yet. "For who?"

"I just have Jackson listed," Michael irately spoke. Birkoff snapped his fingers and pressed the paper up. Michael glanced at it and saw several highly respected shelters on the resume. "Well, call me when he comes in for the interview..."

Michael turned sharply and started down to his office, an office that he still kept, even though Madeline and Paul wanted him to move. There was something about the office that brought him peace. Michael turned and walked into the room and saw the date.

It was six years ago that Nikita was sent out of his life. Michael sighed and settled down in the chair, trying not to think about how suddenly the days of Nikita were back in his mind. It would have been best if Michael just knew what had happened to Nikita when his mind wandered off like this, but he knew that he had to create that break between himself and Nikita. To give her what she needed and not to press himself into her life.

He had done what was right.

But it still didn't feel right.

The papers shuffled about as Michael tried to organize his desk. There was a slight knock on the door and Michael jerked his head up to find Madeline standing there pristinely. "You are going to get some new therapists, correct?"

"Paul made the interview schedule..." Michael bitterly spoke. He liked when the duties he was assigned stayed with him to complete, as he seemed deemed fit. Someone had eliminated the candidates and it should have been Michael. Not Paul.

"I know the candidates... Most are fresh out of graduate school... but highly recommended..." Madeline continued the conversation. She really wanted new therapists up and working in the next few days. They had plans for Michael, but it all hinged on getting more staff underneath him.

"Highly recommended does not mean that they will accept and work under Section One's rules and regulations. I had two candidates I was going to offer the job to decline because of those rules," Michael spoke, although he was not speaking in complete truth. He had made it quite clear that there were parts of Section One that could make a therapist cringe.

"Michael... I shouldn't be telling you this.. but it is looking more like Paul is going to be offered a job with the government.. It will give us strategic power and planning... But for Paul to accept that position, we need you to bring therapists in and be able to make the move up the ladder.... You are to take the place of three people that leave when Paul goes..." Madeline revealed as she slightly tilted her head to the side. Michael was sure that Madeline was saying this to get a reaction from him.

He wasn't going to budge.

"If the candidates will work out, I will hire them. But I will not waste time hiring and training someone only to lose that person due to the strictness of Section One," Michael reiterated, making sure that Madeline realized that he was going to continue to be strong on this.

"Times are going to change Michael. Especially when Paul gets this position. He will have a say on policies and funding streams. Times are changing... I hope that you will change along with them..." Madeline warned out and Michael could hear the threat on her lips.

Michael turned his head and paused. "But is there something else bothering you, today?"

"What?" Michael questioned and Madeline moved closer, studying Michael's face carefully. "I think you have been preoccupied... Please tell me that we are finally past all this Nikita business.... I thought Simone was going to get you past that..."

"It has nothing to do with that. It has just been a long few weeks," Michael countered, as he didn't want to get into this conversation with Madeline once more. Michael moved to his chair to sit down and Madeline was turning to follow.

"Michael? Your interview has arrived..." Birkoff intercommed the office. Michael looked at Madeline as she nodded her head. She was just glad to see that Michael was actually going through with the interviews. That was a big step. "Will you please send him back to my office?"

"I'll send her back..." Birkoff corrected as he responded. Michael rolled his eyes and looked to Madeline. She was already walking backwards. "I hope that this interview goes well..."

Michael tried to ignore Madeline's words and threats during this current conversation. She had not been the easiest person to work with for the past six years, but Michael was here for what seemed like life. They had dealt with all of his problems and Michael was sure that he was better for it. The only time they had disagreed was with Nikita. It was a one-time problem. One that Michael was glad to that he went through, but one that he wished would have ended up differently.

Michael pulled out the resume once more and glanced over the major points. The woman was a graduate from last year's graduate class. She would be skilled, but still very green. Sometimes it didn't matter how skilled a person was, the street kids were rough and needed strong people to interact with them.

But the details just didn't seem to matter. Michael rubbed his hair back and wondered how to start.

He really didn't want to hire this person. It already felt as if Paul had selected this person. Michael had tried to look at the references for any of Paul's old school buddies, but didn't recognize any of the names. In fact, most of the references from women, another signal that Michael took as this candidate being weak and emotional. And none of the names matched colleagues that Madeline had over the years.

There was a ritual to be followed as Michael pulled out the yellow pad of paper to take notes about the interview. Michael found most incredibly dull and boring and often he would mix up the facts of different candidates. It was not considered proper for an interviewer to take notes as blatantly as Michael was going to do, but it was Michael's method.

He was deep into thoughts as he prepared his office for the interview. He didn't notice the soft knock at the door and then the clearing of the throat.

"Hello, Mr. Samuelle..." the voice broke through the air and Michael's head jerked up, sure that it was part of his imagination playing a trick on him. He looked up and saw that there was no trick.

It was Nikita.

And she looked healthy and neatly dressed. Michael smiled as he thought of all the progress that Walter must have had with Nikita.

"Nikita.... What are you doing here? I have an interview... I can't break free from it..." Michael spoke quickly, rambling in a way that was uncharacteristic of who he was. Just seeing Nikita broke all rules of his personality. He had just been thinking about her. The timing couldn't be more ironic.

"I am the interview," Nikita responded and Michael pulled the resume up and looked at it once more.

N. M. Jackson

Michael swallowed and his mind filled in the blanks.

Nikita Marie Jackson

*

If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. It's the hard that makes it great. ~~Tom Hanks in A League of Their Own

"I'm going to be truthfully honest from the start," Michael started as he motioned for Nikita to sit down. He as glad to see her, but his heart churn. Nikita couldn't do this job. "I don't think this is a place for you to work."

"Well, thanks for your opinion. However, I think I am more than able to handle this job," Nikita countered as she settled down. When she had finally landed the interview at Section One, against her pappap's advice, Nikita was excited. It was the challenge that she wanted and the population that she wanted to work with.

Mostly lost teenagers.

"Nikita... I can't imagine that you would want to work here. You came through here..." Michael pointed out as he drifted immediately away from his plan for the interview. He watched all the details of Nikita and drank them in. Although Michael didn't want her working here, he didn't want her to leave.

"I didn't come through here. I came through your house. And yes, I have lived the abused and the homelessness... But I feel that it gives me a distinct advantage with the population... I can help more," Nikita spoke confidently. It was clear that she had thought about all the objections that Michael could have had.

"But it would be hard. Have you even dealt with your issues?" Michael questioned, out of concern for Nikita, but also because he wanted to know if this would impact any possibility of her working for them. Therapists with their own problems are difficult.

"If talking about what I went through from the moment I left your house to this moment is a requirement of the interview, I am more than willing to answer those questions. Where would you like me to start?" Nikita commanded the conversation. It was clear that she knew that this was a possible approach that Michael would take.

"Did you seek treatment?" Michael inquired. He saw Nikita hesitate and then blinked her eyes. "Walter thought that chemical therapy would help..."

"It didn't?" Michael questioned, shocked to hear that it didn't work. It usually helped most.

"I allowed my pappap to think that I was taking the pills, but I didn't want to lose that part of whom I was... The abuse never goes away... but soon I was too busy to think about it..." Nikita stated and Michael felt himself hesitating. He was sure if he pushed here he would find out that basically, Nikita had done nothing about her own problems. But he didn't.

"The education? You went through a lot of school quickly..." Michael judged as he finally looked down at the resume again. Nikita grinned and shrugged her shoulders slightly.

"Turns out I was actually quite bright... and once I knew that I wanted to help others, I really focused on that."

Michael nodded his head and then looked down to the resume. He couldn't even force himself back onto the interview outline. "Nikita... I just don't see this working out."

"You aren't even giving this a chance, Michael. Have you read about the work I did at the women's shelter. Most of their clients dealt with abuse..." Nikita pointed out to the sheets of paper. Michael glanced over the paperwork and then too Nikita. They didn't say anything about Nikita having personal problems about the job and she was working with some of the worst clients.

"You do realize the strict rules and regulations of Section One and why I had to tend to you at my house?" Michael carefully placed the question. Nikita nodded her head. "I realize that some situations do not fall underneath Section One's rules and protocol.. but with all the research on Section One's outcomes, I have been impressed and feel that I can work under these conditions..."

Michael stood up. He looked at the walls and then sighed. The questions continued to flash through his mind quickly, trying to censor himself before saying or asking something wrong. "Have you been out with a man? Have you had a social life?"

"I don't see why that is relevant to the job," Nikita quickly responded as she blinked her blue eyes. Michael looked at her and just wanted to hold her. He knew that Nikita had changed through the years, but Michael's instincts were still the same.

"It gives me a feeling of who you are and what type of loyalty you will have for Section One," Michael quickly came back. Nikita turned her head to the side slightly. "I have focused on school work and volunteer work through these six years. I have no problems in putting in the extra hours. You would have noticed that if you would have thoroughly read my references from school and from my current job."

"And why are you leaving the women's shelter?" Michael questioned and Nikita took a deep sigh. She leaned back in the chair and looked at Michael. He was pushing her but she was wanted this job. She would jump through the hoops.

"The reason why I got into this field was not to help women in marriages that were abusive... I got into this field to help the children that slipped through the cracks... abused children, children on drugs, or children from broken homes find out that there is a place for them in this world that is a lot better than the streets. I want the challenge of doing what my heart tells me to do," Nikita declared as she looked at Michael.

And on some unconscious level she wanted to be back with Michael.

"I want to give you a trial period at Section One. It is not something that is normally done but I am sure that Madeline and Paul will agree that you need to see what will be expected of you and how it will be working with girls who are in similar situations that you were in," Michael spoke and Nikita suppressed her grin. She was going to get the job. She wasn't going to fail.

"I don't see why that period would be needed, but I am willing to comply with any hoops you need me to jump through to prove that I can do this," Nikita spoke out, never hedging from the confidence voice that she had throughout the conversation.

"Nikita... this is for your own good..." Michael pointed out as he pulled some sheets forward. "And... Can you tell me more about what you did when you got to your pappap's. I know Walter was going to bring in some therapists..."

"The gory details..." Nikita wryly spoke as she looked at the paper that listed the beginning wages. It was less than she had expected, but she didn't care. "I saw some therapists but we didn't get along. Before I started college in the fall, Walter had broken down and even brought in Madeline for a while."

"It was probably the worst experience," Nikita commented immediately as Michael's mind charged ahead. He was sure that Madeline wasn't sure who N. Jackson was and this was going to be interesting.

"Do you have therapist now?" Michael questioned. This was a fairly common question for therapists. It was not uncommon for a therapist to have someone to go to when problems got too great.

"I don't see a therapist. Madeline was the last," Nikita stated as she held her responses short. She wasn't going to give Michael more information than what he needed.

"Then I think I should give you a list of therapists that have worked with other therapists inside of Section One. The work here is difficult..." Michael started as he rummaged through the papers on his desk. He stopped when Nikita cleared her throat. "I have a mentor."

"A mentor?" Michael questioned, shocked. He had George. But it was uncommon for mentors in this day and age. "Is it one of your pappap's friends?"

"I will not tell you. You should just be assured that I have someone," Nikita spoke clearly and positively making it clear that she was not going to reveal the identity of her mentor.

"Well then... Why don't you start next week? I will be hiring another therapist and you two can work together through the orientation to Section One," Michael declared as he stood up and shook Nikita's hand. It was clear that all other paperwork would be filled out next week.

"Who do I report too and what time?" Nikita questioned and Michael looked to Nikita and smiled. "I will be handling your training... and we will start at 6:30 am."

Nikita nodded her head, not even batting an eyelash at Michael's statement of a time. It was a test.

And Nikita was used to tests.

~~

The smoke swirled around the room until the door opened and pulled the smoke towards the new opening. George turned and looked at the interruption.

"Those things will kill you," Michael spoke as he closed the door and looked at George. George gently smiled and motioned for Michael to sit down.

"It has been a long time since you have been by. I heard that Section One has been keeping you busy," George stated and Michael sighed. It was the truth. He probably hadn't seen George in over eight months at last count. They had been having lunches once every month since Nikita went to go live with Walter.

"A lot of changes are planned," Michael commented, not sure how much George knew about things. He nodded his head. "Paul may be going to the government... I guess it is causing a lot of openings..."

"That's why I am here today. I had to hire someone," Michael spoke and George raised an eyebrow. He knew that something was bothering Michael. He was too predictable.

"Are they not skilled enough?" George questioned when Michael remained mute, waiting to be prompted to speak.

"She is very skilled..." Michael whispered as he looked to the ashes and then to his hands. He still didn't know why he had hired Nikita. It seemed like a mistake. "It was Nikita."

"Your Nikita?" George questioned and Michael nodded his head as he pushed his hair back slightly. He felt like his world had spun out of control again. "I couldn't turn her away. She has worked with abused women and was top of her graduate class..."

"So you hired her so you wouldn't have a lawsuit?" George prodded, sure that Michael had other reasons behind all of this. Nikita was a special person to Michael, although George was sure that it was only once every year that Michael allowed himself to entertain the thought that he loved Nikita.

"I honestly don't know why I hired her," Michael sadly commented as he rolled his head back.

"Could it be because you love her?" George questioned bluntly. He wanted to know what Michael was thinking, but when Michael was speaking so shortly, it was best to try to make Michael speak, either by getting to the truth or making him upset.

"That's not it. I know that she wants to helps others that are like her," Michael spoke as if he didn't even hear George's real question. Michael should have been outraged that George brought up the topic of love again.

"I'm not sure why you are still here, Michael. Why don't you explain that to me?" George questioned. Michael always had a plan or an agenda. It was the reality of working at Section One.

"Nikita said that she had a mentor.... Not many people around will be mentors.... I was wondering if you knew someone who would do that..." Michael questioned and George shook his head. It was clear that Michael wanted to know a lot more about Nikita without asking her.

The boy still had it bad.

"We don't have a mentor's camping trip, Michael. Sometimes becoming a mentor is quite by accident..." George spoke out with a slight chuckle. Michael merely blinked his eyes, unmoved by the comment. "But you know Walter Jackson. Maybe it is someone he knows..."

"And if I did know Michael... I wouldn't tell you. It's Nikita's life. But I thought you would be happy to be back with her..." George stated and Michael stood up, displeased with the lack of information that he had received from George.

Michael turned and shoved his hands into his pockets. "Maybe we can have lunch next week."

"I think I am busy... and shouldn't you be busy showing Nikita around?" George questioned. Michael shrugged his shoulders and left the room. George smiles softly, judging that Michael was reacting perhaps in the manner that he had expected.

He was pleased to see Michael had reconnected with Nikita. Now the two just had to be more than boss and employee.

*

When you've got something to prove, there's nothing greater than a challenge. ~ Terry Bradshaw ~

Wednesday was a challenging day for Michael's schedule. Madeline was going to be outside of Section One most of the day and he had to continue training Nikita and his other new hire Andrea about the way to handling things at Section One.

Whatever Michael had felt about Nikita had been pushed aside in his attempt to be as objective as he could about the situation. There had been no opportunities for Nikita or even Andrea to prove that they could do this job. They were extremely busy watching the training videos and going over the paperwork.

Theoretically, the real job wouldn't start until next week when Nikita and Andrea would get a caseload. A caseload that Michael would carefully monitor and selected for each one. Michael had already started the process, unconsciously selecting those girls and boys off of the streets that were easier to handle for Nikita.

"Michael... the heater in the clinic is broken," Davenport stated as he charged into the room. Michael turned around and both of his new hires turned around. Michael swallowed.

He hadn't gotten down to the clinic yet, although that was normally done on the first day. It was because Nikita knew Davenport and he was trying to avoid the situation.

"Davenport.... Let me introduce you to our new therapist... Andrea Lukehart and Nikita Jackson," Michael stated quickly, hoping that with all the people that Davenport saw through the years, that he would forget Nikita.

But Nikita wouldn't let it happen. She had been quite open with Andrea, saying and revealing that years ago she had to seek help at Section One. She didn't tell details, but she didn't hide it. "Dr. Davenport. We have met before. It is good to see you again."

"Nikita?" Davenport questioned as he looked at the healthy woman and then to Michael. He was shocked that he didn't know about this sooner. Davenport couldn't remember how many times he had questioned Michael about Nikita's whereabouts and her condition. He never answered him. To see her as the new therapist made Davenport extremely happy. She was a success because of Michael.

"Yes... I know that I am a lot better than the last time I saw you," Nikita commented and Davenport laughed. The last time he did see Nikita she was still recovering from the pneumonia and the bronchitis that rendered her virtually immobile at Michael's house.

"You still are underweight."

"It's genetics," Nikita commented with a brilliant smile. Davenport had heard bits and pieces of what was wrong with Nikita and to see her like this now was great. And he felt that he had helped in this miracle.

"Davenport... about the heater?" Michael spoke suddenly, wanting this conversation to get over with. It had already happened with Birkoff, but Michael couldn't even describe the interaction between Nikita and Birkoff. It was as if they had fallen into a brother and sister relationship. It was strange and twisted. Something that Michael would try to monitor.

'It's blowing cold air. It is going to make everyone sicker than they are now..." Davenport spoke and Michael rolled his head. He moved to the desk and pulled up the phone. Nikita looked around and shrugged her shoulders at Andrea, who had been staring at Nikita.

"You are quite familiar with the staff.... Is that why you got the job?" Andrea questioned and Nikita looked over her shoulder and pressed her lips together. "No. I got the job from determination. Michael didn't want to give it to me."

"Well, at least I know that he doesn't have a personal relationship with you... He is a gorgeous man..." Andrea stated as she looked at Michael as he spoke on the phone. Nikita smiled back at Davenport, ignoring how Andrea had already seemed to be obsessed with Michael.

Although Nikita had a stage that all that she could do was think about Michael in probably the same manner. For about a week.

"They are coming over immediately..." Michael spoke as he hung up the phone and stood up. Davenport nodded his head and then looked back to Nikita. "I hope to see you around. The clinic is always open, so drop by."

"We'll be down on Friday," Michael informed Davenport, stepping in front of Davenport and Nikita. He waited for Davenport to exit and then turned to look at the two new therapists.

"When are we going to see clients?" Nikita questioned Michael. All of this was informative training, but it was all about methods and training that she had already had. And she knew Section One's history. It was like Michael was holding off on sending her out with the real job. "Not till next week."

"That's ridiculous. I didn't go to graduate school to be treated like a pre-school child," Nikita declared as she raised her eyes to look at Michael. Andrea stayed quiet. She didn't care about the pause. It only gave her more time to work on Michael and impress him.

But she wasn't doing that.

"Fine. We'll do a tour right now," Michael spoke and Nikita bitterly pushed out a cold smile. Michael waited for Andrea to stand up also. "I think you shouldn't deviate from your plans for one person."

"Andrea, each training is different. Now if you have issues with the way I am training, maybe we should meet after training today and discuss that," Michael snapped out as he moved to the doorway. Nikita stepped towards the back, realizing that Andrea was going to do exactly what Michael offered.

Nikita looked at the various rooms where there were different therapists running various activities. Some were doing one-on-one therapy and others were holding group therapy. Nikita looked into the rooms and couldn't wait to start helping. "Your basic task when you first start will be more of information and referral. Getting people into treatment programs and into resources that could get them off of the streets."

Nikita looked at Michael. She could tell that in a way that he was already trying to protect her. Nikita realized that she was going to have to do something about that.

"Michael... we are backed up. Can you please do something?" Birkoff whined from the main desk as the group entered the main room. Nikita scanned the room as she ignored the biting conversation between Birkoff and Michael continued. She looked to the corner to a girl who was hiding as close to the heater as she could get too. Nikita looked to the side and saw that no one was soon coming to her. The main room was left for new admits that didn't have an assigned therapist yet.

And Nikita moved towards the girl. She squatted and smiled carefully. "Hello. My name is Nikita... Can I help you?"

The girl lifted her head, allowing her brown hair to shower around her. She looked up at Nikita and then cowered some more. Nikita heard the girl's stomach rumbling and Nikita swallowed. This girl wasn't going to speak until Nikita could make her trust her.

"Nikita, what are you doing?" Andrea questioned loudly, calling Michael's attention to what Nikita was doing. Nikita stood up and looked towards Michael who had abruptly forgotten about Birkoff's complaints. "Nikita... we have therapists that are covering the new admits."

"Michael, I have sat in that classroom for three days. I'm ready to do this," Nikita stated as she turned her back on him. She bent down again and offered a hand to the girl. "Would you like to get something to eat?"

"You don't even know her name, Nikita. This is not the way we do things," Michael warned as he stood staring in disbelief. Nikita shrugged her shoulders as she stood up and the girl took Nikita's hand. "It's called compassion and realizing what she needs most. All other things are superficial until she eats."

Nikita moved smoothly away from Michael and Andrea, leaving them together. Nikita wasn't here to find a mate like Andrea was, as she had already had her sights located on Michael. Nikita was here to work and make a difference. If that meant breaking away from Michael, then she was going to do that.

"Maybe we can go back to the training..." Andrea questioned as she looked at Michael and smiled dutifully, sure that she was going to get the full time job over Nikita. She smiled and followed Michael back to the room.

Or maybe she would get Michael.

~~

"Do you want more hot chocolate?" Nikita questioned the girl as she settled down in the chair at the table across from her. The cafeteria was empty for the most part right now. It was good. The girl had hurriedly eaten all of the food that Nikita had brought to her and she was scared.

Although Nikita didn't know how old she was, Nikita was guessing that the girl was about ten if not younger. She was small but Nikita waited for a moment before running to the phone and contacting missing persons. Sometimes kids were smart enough to run away, but not smart enough to go back. Nikita didn't think that this girl had the same problems that Nikita had. She trusted Nikita too quickly to have been abused.

"No, thank you," The girl responded politely. Someone cared for her and now Nikita wanted to see what was the real problem.

"You know that I am Nikita... but I still don't know your name..." Nikita pointed out.

The girl lifted her head and looked up at Nikita. Someone had to be missing this sweet girl.

"Sasha..." she responded. Nikita nodded her head and smiled. "That is such a pretty name, Sasha..."

Nikita paused and waited. She didn't want to ask too many questions. She looked around and was surprised not to find Michael standing behind her, waiting for her to make a mistake. "Sasha... where are your parents?"

"They died," Sasha responded as her brown eyes turned down and filled slightly with tears. Nikita nodded her head and felt her heart go out to the young girl. " Who do you live with now?"

"Just my brother... Peter..." Sasha stated and Nikita nodded her head. It was not uncommon for something like this to happen. The real world tried not to notice it, but it happened more than thought. Nikita could also tell that Peter was the older brother. "Where do you live?"

"Down the road. In a small apartment.... I was supposed to go to school... but I was so cold and hungry..." Sasha spoke and Nikita leaned in and took Sasha's hands. Her brother must have been trying so hard to keep them together. The system, although it sometimes worked, often would break apart brother and sister. "Sasha... how old is your brother?"

"He is fourteen... and he works at the gas station. Sometimes he brings home chocolate for dinner," Sasha supplied. Nikita sighed and rubbed the girl's cheek tenderly. "Do you think Peter would come here to talk to me? Maybe we can help you two?"

Sasha looked at Nikita. She wasn't sure that she could trust Nikita. Nikita leaned back and pulled out something from her pocket. It was a small pinkie ring that she slipped onto Sasha's hand. "See... I am going to give you this... and you can bring it back when you bring Peter.... Or, if Peter doesn't want to come.... Trade it for food when you are hungry..."

Sasha smiled and nodded her head. Nikita stood up and retrieved some more food and wrapped it up. "And I'm making you a bag of food for dinner tonight, ok?"

"I like you," Sasha stated as she looked at Nikita working. Nikita stopped and smiled at Sasha. "Can you be my new mother?"

"Oh, darling... I can't take your mother's place... But I can help you and your brother. Would you like that?" Nikita questioned and Sasha nodded her head. It had been a long year for her and her brother. To have some help would be great.

Michael turned the corner and then stopped as he saw Madeline standing at the doorway of the cafeteria. "I'm sorry. She wouldn't complete training."

"Sorry? She is working quite well. Where did you find her?" Madeline questioned as she turned and looked at Michael. Michael dropped his head and hesitated for a second.

Andrea's training had come to an abrupt end when she moved in on Michael in the classroom. Michael passed her onto another therapist to try to keep her on, but Michael didn't hold out much hope. "It was one of Paul's interviews."

"Very skilled. Highly unusually for a therapist in a new place of employment. What is her name?" Madeline questioned and Michael was frozen. He didn't know if Madeline was going to take this right. "Nikita Jackson."

"Nikita?" Madeline questioned as she turned her head towards Michael and her eyes frosted over with shock. Michael nodded his head and Madeline turned back. "Now that is a surprise."

"Because she had problems of her own?" Michael defensively questioned and Madeline looked over her shoulder at Michael. She could hear the tone of anger in his voice. It had been a long while since she had heard emotion from Michael. "No. We all have problems. Hers were only extreme."

"And because she didn't work them out through you, you think there is a problem?" Michael questioned strongly, allowing Madeline to know that he knew about her stint as Nikita's therapist. Madeline turned around and nodded her head. "She wasn't open to me. I find it surprising that she would come into the field."

"Well, you said it yourself, she is skilled," Michael pointed out as he looked at Nikita as she worked on packing the bag with Sasha. They were talking and Michael was sure that Nikita was getting a lot of information out of the little girl in comparison to what others would have. Himself included.

"With this little girl. But most of our clients are teenagers, rough and off of the streets. Do you think she will cope?" Madeline demanded as she quickly moved into questioning Michael's opinion of Nikita.

"She was highly recommended and worked with abused women. I had to give her the benefit of the doubt," Michael spoke and Madeline nodded her head, studying Nikita once more.

"And the other new hire?"

"There are problems," Michael spoke and Madeline turned and narrowed her eyes. Andrea had been her choice for Michael to hire. "What do you mean?"

"She had other reasons for accepting the job. She cannot take one-on-one training with me," Michael stated, trying not to get into the details. Madeline looked at Michael and tilted her head to the side. "Maybe it is your methods."

"Maybe it was her hand down my pants," Michael stated back at Madeline. Madeline nodded her head and then cleared her throat. "Well we at least know we won't have those problems with Nikita."

Michael wanted to fight back with Madeline, but he had no proof that Nikita was over her problems. He had a feeling that Nikita went to work and then stayed a recluse. Whenever he had gotten close enough to Nikita, she would find a way to step back away from him.

"I have Andrea working with a different therapist, but I see it highly unlikely that it will work out," Michael stated and Madeline shook her head. She didn't like the sounds of that one.

"Then we are lucky that Nikita is skilled. Why don't you give her the full time job starting next week?" Madeline pressured Michael. Michael blinked his eyes and tried to settle down his nerves. "I wanted to see if she is ready for this job."

"You stated yourself that she is skilled. Are you waiting for her to fail?" Madeline challenged and Michael immediately shook his head. Madeline had him pinned. "And of course, Michael... if she does fail... It will be your fault."

Before Michael could protest, Madeline turned away and went to her office. Michael looked towards Nikita who was entirely focused on the girl. He had to wonder what Nikita thought about the past six years.

She had sent him postcards now and then, but he had to wonder if she ever thought about him as much as he thought about her.

"Michael... I'm so glad that we will be able to share lunch together!" Andrea exclaimed as she walked back down the hallway.

~~

"Sugar!" Walter hollered as he pounded at the door to Nikita's rooms. It wasn't a full apartment, it was just a part of the house that Walter had been able to give Nikita free reign in.

And the ability to play her music as loud as possible.

"SUGAR!" Walter hollered again, surprised and shocked to hear the music this loud. It was usually a good indicator that something was wrong.

Suddenly the door opened and Nikita turned around before Walter could even kiss her good day.

"Did something happen at work today?" Walter questioned as he entered the area and tried to find the source of the music. Walter turned off one and heard the music continuing from another stereo. Walter tried to stay calm, but as Nikita continued to walk away, he had to worry.

It had been like this since last Wednesday.

"Nikita... talk to me! Did something happen at Section One?" Walter questioned. He had been in a state of constant worry about Section One and Nikita working there. No matter how much he tried to get Nikita not to work there, she wanted to go there for some unknown reason. He was afraid that Michael was going to tell everyone about what had happened to her.

"Section One is fine. It is Andrea that has to go!" Nikita hissed and Walter raised an eyebrow. If Nikita was hissing about anyone, he had expected it to be about Michael. Those first few days, Nikita came home to drink over wine with Walter about the treatment from Michael. But Walter didn't mind to hear that Michael was acting protective of Nikita and who she treated. It made him feel more comfortable.

Sometimes, Nikita was just too much like her father. Pig headed and stubborn.

"Who is Andrea?" Walter questioned as he turned off the other stereo, launching the both of them into quiet for a change.

"She is the other new therapist," Nikita announced as she flounced down onto her couch. Walter settled down and looked at her carefully. "And what is the problem?"

"She doesn't do anything. She is so busy trying to hit on Michael and talking to him that she skips out of group therapy which she is supposed to be helping me with," Nikita commented and Walter nodded his head. He was so glad to hear all of this. Michael had been good to Nikita six years ago, but Walter didn't think it was wise for the two of them to be so close together again. It was good to hear that Michael was busy with Andrea.

"Well... maybe Michael wants to be near Andrea..." Walter pointed out and Nikita rolled her eyes. "And you don't like to share the duties of group therapy either way!"

"But there is major problems with her. Whenever she is near me it is like she is worried that I'm going to take Michael away from her. I even tried to tell her that I have no interest in dating and she didn't believe me. I'm not a threat!" Nikita continued to complain and Walter nodded his head. This was an issue that was always tender with him.

It always made Walter think that Nikita wasn't really healed. She never went out. Never. She had no other friends. It was school or work and him. It was scary for a young lady to live like that.

"She thinks you are interested in Michael?" Walter questioned and Nikita leaned her head back. "I just want to do my job. Why do I have to listen to her?"

"She is a co-worker. You could just be nice," Walter pointed out and Nikita stood up and moved to her bedroom. "YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND!"

"Apparently, I don't." Walter whispered as he turned and exited.

Minutes later, the music was pounding again.

*

You will recognize your own path when you come upon it, because you will suddenly have all the energy and imagination you will ever need. ~ Jerry Gillies ~

The smell of jasmine drifted towards Nikita as she entered the small greenhouse, finding peace surrounding her for the first time since she started her new job at Section One. It was not that Nikita regretted taking the job. She loved it. It was all the other things that went along with the job.

And her first fight with her pappap. Ever. He had sulked for days, but Nikita wouldn't give into his attitude. He had to learn that she had to live her own life.

Finally Nikita found herself on a Saturday with sometime to herself. She sought out her peace.

"Adrian?" Nikita called out as she started across the small bridge over the Japanese goldfish pond into the lush garden environment that she often found her mentor in when she needed time to meditate and ground herself once more.

"Nikita? Girl, why are you here?" Adrian questioned as she poked her head up from the flowers, which she was weeding. Nikita smiled at the woman and moved to chastely kiss both cheeks.

"I needed to get away," Nikita spoke as she dropped her small bag to the floor and started to pull out her mat for meditation. Meditation was only one of the things that Adrian had taught Nikita and when things were going on at a rapid pace, Nikita trained herself to slow down for moments like this, with or without her mentor.

Nikita had a key to the greenhouse. It was always open to her.

"But you have a new job. I thought you would be busy. Maybe out with co-workers?" Adrian suggested and Nikita looked at Adrian smiled. "Actually, I have a problem with the one co-worker."

"Not, Michael I hope," Adrian stated and Nikita took a shaky breath. This was the woman that knew the most about Nikita, but there was a lot that Nikita kept hidden. Nikita sat down on the floor and pulled her tennis shoes off.

"No. Another therapist... Nothing big. And I love the job," Nikita stated as she rolled her head around her shoulders and then to hang it down. Adrian could tell that Nikita was stressed out but she wasn't sure if Nikita realized exactly why she was stressed out.

"Something is bothering you," Adrian spoke as she dropped the shovel to the ground even as Nikita pulled her legs in the crossed position. Nikita leaned her head back for a moment, knowing that she had to answer Adrian's question.

"I had my first fight with Walter," Nikita stated out with short words. "I don't even know exactly what the point of it was."

"That happens when you go to a new job," Adrian commented as she sat down and looked at Nikita. The young woman closed her eyes and placed her hands on her knees, trying to find that place of relaxation. "So this has nothing to do with Michael?"

"No," Nikita quickly stated, trying to keep herself centered. Nikita realized that with Adrian in this mood that it might be difficult. "I did come here to meditate."

Adrian looked at Nikita and studied her face as she took the deep breaths. She was going to ask something that she never would ask another pupil. When Nikita first started meditation, it took a long time for Nikita to appreciate the wonders and she had a long time in discovering the right focus in her visualized relaxation point. Now Adrian could clearly understand what it was.

It was Michael.

"What does he look like in your thoughts? Has that changed since you started to work for him?" Adrian questioned, unable to keep the words from being spoke. Nikita snapped her eyes open and tilted her head towards Adrian. She was trying to play it off, that Nikita didn't understand what Adrian asked, but Adrian knew much better.

"Have you been near too much fertilizer today?" Nikita questioned and Adrian peacefully smiled back at Nikita. Nikita shook her head and tried to ignore what Adrian said as she settled back down and took one deep breath.

"It's Michael," Adrian spoke just as Nikita's body shuttered with relaxation. She knew that she was playing with Nikita, but this seemed to be the only way to get the information out from Nikita. She had been opened to same things, but mostly Nikita kept people away by an arms length.

"What is Michael?" Nikita questioned as she slumped her shoulders and narrowed her eyes.

Adrian reached out and took Nikita's hand.

"It's ok to use him as your relaxation image. Actually, I think it is kind of sweet," Adrian admitted. It would be the first sign of emotions that Adrian was looking for. Nikita was too young to cut herself off of a social life.

"I guess it is what worked in the past and I just kept it. Do you think I should change it?" Nikita inquired, thinking about her choice. It was clear that whatever Nikita had realized in the past about her relationship with Michael, or perhaps about her feelings in the past, had long been hidden again and needed to be rediscovered.

"I think you should explore what you feel for Michael," Adrian pointed out and Nikita shook her head. She was here to relax. Not to think more about Michael.

"Please... Just a half hour of meditation... I've had a long week," Nikita tried to bargain herself. But Adrian had moved closer.

"You can't admit that you felt something and still do... Nikita, how long are you going to shut yourself off from yourself and me?" Adrian continued to hammer away at the young woman. Adrian had helped build Section One, but it had been a different creature when she was there. But she knew what it would take out of person, especially if they were not being true to themselves.

"Is something wrong, Adrian? This isn't like you," Nikita questioned now, sensing that Adrian's approach was different. Nikita sighed and kicked her legs out and leaning back on her palms. "You are acting just like Walter. Have you two talked?"

"No. I know that he would be concerned about your position at Section One," Adrian spoke and Nikita tossed her head to the side. Adrian had wanted Nikita to apply for the job, as it would be an excellent opportunity to explore herself and her talents. Adrian now seemed to be doing a turn in the opposite direction.

"And what about you? What do you think about it?" Nikita demanded as her blue eyes glared at the older woman.

"I think that you are already stressed out for reasons that are not job related," Adrian assessed as she pulled up her shovel and moved back to the flowers. Adrian knew that Nikita would not allow it to end there. "What do you mean?"

"I feel sorry for you, Nikita. You are a young lady. You should be able to love and why you can't admit your feelings for Michael is beyond me," Adrian spoke as she knelt down to the dirt once more. Nikita stared at Adrian, feeling the tears build up. They were tears that she would not allow Adrian see. Nikita turned away and whisked them away. "Why do you do that, Nikita?"

"Do what?" Nikita huskily responded to Adrian. Nikita slowly turned her head back and hoped that the slight redness in her eyes didn't show. Adrian looked over at Nikita and swallowed. She saw someone that hurt badly, but someone who couldn't open up.

"Hide your tears? Hide your pain? How can you not let me in?" Adrian questioned as she looked at the young woman. Nikita blinked her eyes and shook her head back and forth, but the answer was there. "Michael was there, wasn't he? Is that why you can't see what you feel?"

"I think this conversation is over. Thanks for the chance to relax," Nikita snapped as she stood up and walked quickly out of the greenhouse, only taking her purse with her. Adrian leaned her head back in thought.

She wanted to know the entire story of Nikita's life. She knew that there were hints of abuse, but how much and to what extent was something that only Nikita knew, and she never spoke of it. From the moment that Adrian had met Nikita, while she was in the spring of her first year of college, on the urging of Walter, Nikita had been charming, but always appearing to be missing something.

Something like love.

It was there and Adrian was sure that Nikita was just scared of the true feelings that she had for Michael.

"Ma'am... George is on the phone for you," One of Adrian's female employees stated as they entered the greenhouse. Adrian blinked her eyes. She hadn't heard from George in a long time. She knew that George was Michael's mentor, but didn't want to pry into Nikita's life. She needed to come terms with it all on her own.

"Please tell him I am busy," Adrian stated and the woman nodded her head. She picked up the mat from the ground and returned to the main house as Adrian stayed, deep in thought.

~~

Nikita looked at Andrea and shook her head. She was supposed to be helping out with the group activity, but she stayed near the vending machines, looking for Michael. The girl was hopeless.

They had been assigned to work with the younger children this week. Most of it meant dealing out snacks after school and making sure that they were safe until their parents came in later to pick them up. The biggest problem that Nikita had to deal with was about lost homework and name-calling.

Not what she called therapy.

Nikita turned away from Andrea, sure that she was going to have to say a word or two to her before this day got over. Yes, this wasn't therapy, but right now Nikita was wrangling thirty-two kids by herself. She wasn't the only babysitter around. But as Nikita turned around, she saw the one girl that she had hoped to see. Sasha.

"Hello, Sasha. Did you come in from school?" Nikita questioned as her attention fragmented immediately. Sasha and her brother had been placed with a family on Friday and Nikita suggested that for the time being, that after school that Sasha and Peter come and stay at Section One, in case they had anything they were afraid to discuss with the foster family. Peter had his own issues and was assigned his own primary therapist, and he had dropped off Sasha with a group that Nikita was running.

"Yes," Sasha stated as she pulled off her jacket. Nikita noted that all the other children were busy with their art projects, which Nikita would look over afterwards in case something could be noted from it. For now, Nikita had some time with Sasha.

"How do you like your new home?" Nikita questioned as she settled down next to the young girl. She shrugged her shoulders.

"It's not my home. It's theirs..." Sasha stated and Nikita nodded her head. This is exactly why Nikita didn't want to just drop off Sasha and Peter in the house without somewhere for them to talk. They still were dealing with the deaths of their parents and needed somewhere safe.

"I know it feels that way... but Nicole and Pierre are great people and they really want to give you a home... And I think that is what your parents would want for you two..." Nikita pointed out, trying to continue the conversation, but also to allow Sasha to know that Nikita respected the individuals who were taking care of them.

"Nicole is funny... But it just isn't home. Not like before..." Sasha commented as she smiled briefly when she mentioned Nicole.

"You miss your mom and your father.... You should..." Nikita confirmed for the young girl. Sasha sighed and looked at Nikita's hand. "Really?"

"Yes, you should. Never forget them. They are a part of you, and a part of you that you will never lose. They are inside of you..." Nikita spoke as she pointed to Sasha's chest.

Nikita jerked her head up as she heard yelling from another part of Section One. She had to protect her children if she needed too. Andrea had already ran out into the hallway and Nikita sighed.

~~

"I've had it!" Erin screamed as she moved down the hallway, Michael flocking her, trying to get the skilled therapist to turn back around and back to work.

"Erin... Today has been bad... but you know what good we can do here..." Michael pointed out and Erin shook her head back and forth. The screaming continued in the room that she had come from and other therapists were leaving to look in the hallway. It wasn't until Nikita pushed Andrea back into the room with the children, that a therapist made a move for the room that Erin had left.

"I'm quitting! I can't take it Michael! I can't do any good. There is nothing in those children. They are monsters!" Erin continued to scream as she continued down the hallway. Michael felt his jaw clench. He knew the scenario that would happen if Erin really did leave. And he had to get Erin to stop this ranting and raving before Madeline came and saw what happened. Outbursts like this are not tolerated from staff.

"Erin. This is your job. You have been here for seven years. Just don't leave," Michael urged and then stopped as Madeline turned the corner. She looked at Erin and then Michael. "If you leave at this moment and don't resume your duties with your assigned group, I'll have security escort you out and have your severance pay sent in the mail."

"Screw you, Madeline! You are running this place wrong! You don't even care about these children!" Erin screamed as she continued down the hallway, making it clear that she was out. Madeline looked at Michael and then started to walk down the hallway to find the problem. "What happened?"

"The teenagers have been growing in size. We need more therapists..." Michael spoke and Madeline sighed. It had been hard of late to get anyone to stay on. Now with losing Erin, things were going to be difficult. No one wanted to work with the teenagers.

"But what happened? I told you to look at Erin and watch her. She was on an edge for a long time..." Madeline corrected Michael, trying to find someone that she could easily blame.

"She also has been working virtually nonstop for the past four months, including weekends..." Michael pointed back out, not allowing Madeline to make him the whipping boy for this one.

"Stephen will be back tomorrow..." Madeline stated coldly. Stephen was a therapist that had been sharing the duties with Erin until one of the teenagers broke his ankle. He was finally out of the cast and cleared to work again.

Madeline looked at the rooms and then stopped as she heard that the room was very quiet, which was abnormal for whenever there was a problem. Madeline inched towards the closed door and looked inside.

Nikita was talking to a couple of the girls, probably the two that caused the fight to start with and the others had resumed working on books and homework. Madeline turned her head and smiled. "Nikita is very skilled.."

"She isn't ready for that group, Madeline," Michael warned as he could feel the pit in his stomach churning. He had seen that look on Madeline's face before. Her mind was made up. "But she wants to work with teenagers. I think it is a perfect match."

"What about Andrea? She isn't going to be able to run the kids group..." Michael pointed out, hoping to stop Madeline's final decision. He didn't hold out much hope of getting Nikita through if she got placed with the teenagers. He wouldn't be able to watch her. He couldn't screen who got into that group or not.

"I think she is outlasting her stay.... I'm sure that by today you will see her true colors... Maybe Stephen could run the children's group until you get some more new therapists..." Madeline stated as she smiled back at Michael. To Madeline, everything was fine and she was going to get to test Nikita. She didn't believe that Nikita could stay on and couldn't wait to drive her away.

Michael opened the door and looked to Nikita. "You can go back to your group... I will talk to you later..."

Nikita moved away from the girls and brushed past Nikita. The group looked at Michael. They were all afraid of him. He remembered when he used to run this group and how much fun it was. Groups were always fun, but times had been changing. Although Michael loved the work he had done with the individuals that was where more problems with Section One protocol laid.

"You'll have a new leader tomorrow... I suggest you think hard about what all of you caused today," Michael spoke as he closed the door and settled down. No one spoke and Michael sat there, staring at them all until it was time for them all to leave.

~~

"You think you have him figured out..." Andrea spat out as she walked into the staff room that was unusually empty and placed her hands on her hips. Nikita looked at Andrea and swallowed. She did already tell Andrea what she thought about her when she went back to the children and saw the mayhem that had ensued.

"What are you talking about?" Nikita questioned although Nikita was wise enough to know that Andrea was speaking about Michael.

"Trying to impress him, aren't you?" Andrea continued on in her rant as she turned around and locked the door. Nikita felt her heart race forward and blinked her eyes. She couldn't allow Andrea to see that she was scared.

But Nikita was ready to pee her pants.

"I did what was necessary. We can't let the children be alone. That was discussed in the training..." Nikita responded with a calm and steady voice.

"Following the rules will get you closer to him. Is that why you are back here?" Andrea questioned as she moved in on Nikita. Nikita swallowed and looked towards the window before leaning against the wall.

"I'm back here because I want to make a difference. I didn't realize that Michael was still here," Nikita spoke out the truth. Everything that had been so right last week seemed to be getting worse. If only if she had the time to mediate instead of listening to Adrian.

"I saw the way you look at him. You want him," Andrea hissed as she closed the distance between Nikita and herself. Nikita knew that right now there was a danger. Andrea was unstable and Nikita cleared her throat.

"You can have him. I'm not interested in him," Nikita replied as her voice cracked. Her body was responding with fear. Andrea wasn't a man, but to Nikita it didn't matter. Her stomach churned and if she weren't in such a vulnerable position, Nikita probably would have passed out.

"YOU WANT HIM! You want to f$ck him!" Andrea hollered as the room shook. Nikita could hear someone knocking on the door, but couldn't hear the voice. She only heard Andrea as she continued on with what Nikita wanted to do with Michael.

"You have it wrong.... Please, listen to me..." Nikita begged out as the tears started to form in her eyes. Andrea was in front of her, her face mere fractions away from hers. Nikita could feel the spittle from Andrea's words spotting her face.

"NO! YOU LISTEN TO ME! I WILL HAVE HIM! HE IS MINE! YOU ARE RUINED GOODS! YOUR USED P&SSY SHOULDN'T BE WASTED ON HIM!" Andrea shouted into Nikita's face. She slammed a hand to the side of Nikita's shoulder and Nikita flinched. Nikita tried to stay strong, but the words hurt.

In many ways, Nikita believed them.

"Please... just talk to him.... I have nothing to do with this..." Nikita murmured as she flinched as another hand slammed against the wall. "DID I SAY THAT YOU COULD SPEAK?" The door flung open and soon Andrea was hauled away. Nikita turned her head to look at Michael. He was angry and Nikita turned her head once more. "Can I go?"

Michael looked at Nikita and swallowed. He wanted to reach out and hold her. Andrea was psychotic and rattled Nikita. But Michael knew that there were others in the room. Nikita probably wouldn't want special treatment. "I still need to talk to you in my office. Can we meet in twenty minutes?"

Nikita felt her entire body tense. She was going to get fired for not being able to handle the situation. She had been able to handle the children, but she couldn't stop Andrea. It showed how weak she really was.

"Is it necessary? I would rather like to get home," Nikita spoke; as she still didn't dare to turn her head back to Michael. Michael looked around the room, knowing that Nikita was still shaking. He could see her body doing exactly that. And his words that were tense were not meant to frighten her more. She had held up amazing well, although he was positive now that nothing in Nikita's past had been dealt with.

"We need to talk," Michael stated and Nikita started to nod her head. She rubbed her cheek softly, trying to hide the fact that she was rubbing away tears. "I need to freshen up... and I'll meet you there..."

Nikita brushed past Michael and quickly moved down the hallway. Michael looked at her and sighed heavily as Birkoff walked in. "Boy, what happened? Was that our therapist that they were leading out of here in a straight jacket?"

"It's been a long day, Birkoff..." Michael bite out as he turned and exited the room too, his mind charging ahead, trying to figure out what to do with Nikita now.

"Then I guess I shouldn't mention to you to tell Nikita that her grandfather had been by..." Birkoff whispered as he looked at the empty room. He had to wonder what happened and what had Michael so on edge. It had been many years since Michael was like that.

Probably when Nikita needed his help.

*

Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you; they're supposed to help you discover who you are. ~ Bernice Johnson Reagon

Michael rounded the corner and headed towards his office with his head down. About five feet away from the door, Michael stopped, noticing that was already open. He tilted his head to the side slightly and saw Nikita sitting there in the chair in front of his desk, as if she was waiting to be punished.

Michael had noticed how frightened that Nikita was. He was sure that if the same event had happened somewhere else, and not at work, she would have ran as far away as she could. It chilled him to the bone that on the outside Nikita appeared normal and capable. But looking into his office he could see that the dark past that Nikita had once started to lay out for him, was still very much in control of her life.

With a slight glance at his watch, Michael clarified that he was early. He turned away from his office, glad that most of the personnel in this part of Section One had already left for the day. Michael wanted to give Nikita the time that he had allocated for her. Michael could look into the office and see that Nikita was struggling to pull herself together.

He had to wonder what her mind was thinking at this moment.

Her hair was neatly pulled back up, something that in the past day Michael had noticed. Nikita never wore the beautiful hair down. It was always up. He took slight solace in the fact that it wasn't in a strict bun, but Michael knew that this was probably one of those unconscious things that Nikita did without even noticing it. Some of the hair had fallen as she pressed herself against the wall. Now it was back in place, as if Nikita was trying to portray that nothing happened.

Michael looked at the watch again and swallowed. It was time to go on. He wanted to deal with what had happened, but this meeting wasn't about that. Nikita didn't know that either. This was about Madeline's idea of placing Nikita with the teenagers. Michael walked into the office and felt his stomach flip. He didn't think that Nikita could ever function with that group.

"Hello, Nikita... thank you for meeting with me," Michael spoke as he rounded the edge of the desk and started to unbutton his jacket. There was a couch that would have been better suited, but Michael didn't even have the opportunity to suggest that.

"I'm so sorry for my reaction early... It was inexcusable that I didn't react in a more professional manner..." Nikita started to say very quickly. She was twisting her hands and the evidence of tears continued to stain her face and tint the edges of her eyes red.

"Nikita..." Michael attempted to stop her, but Nikita stood up quickly.

"Please don't take my job away from me. I can prove that I can do this job... It is what I need to do... I am meant to have that job and help those kids. I hope that you can look past what happened today and my inability to stop the crisis situation before it got out of control and see that I really want to be here..." Nikita continued on as she paced back and forth. Michael was chilled once more, wondering what had happened in that room between Nikita and Andrea and what had been said.

"Nikita... I'm not upset about that... and that is not even the real reason why I wanted to talk to you..." Michael hurried out as Nikita took in ragged breaths. Michael looked, as Nikita turned around stunned. "I've done something else wrong?"

"No," Michael quickly responded and then sucked in the air that he had just spoken with. His reaction was too quick and Nikita started to shake. "Oh my god... you aren't happy with me. Am I here to be fired for going into that room? Because I didn't stay with my group?"

"Nikita... I am not upset about anything... and although I would like to discuss what happened, it is not what I needed to talk to you about..." Michael spoke clearly as he waited for Nikita to look at him. She did and settled back into the chair.

"I just can't relax... I can usually just pull myself back together..." Nikita stated, not wanting Michael to see her falling apart like this. It was highly unusual for Nikita to allow anyone to see her upset and with tears on her face. Other than Andrea, Michael had been the last person to see her tears.

Six years ago.

"I don't want you to worry about this meeting. I just have to inform you that Madeline wants you to work with the teenagers starting tomorrow..." Michael finally blurted out, unsure of any other manner that he could tell Nikita that this wasn't bad news.

But for Michael, this wasn't good news either.