It had the makings of a classic horror story. It was dark and stormy. It was dark, but it wasn't actually stormy. The storm was brewing inside the house. The house was dark. It had been dark since Madeline arrived.

It matched the feeling inside of Nikita's body. She was numb. She didn't see the light and she couldn't see where she was going.

She was numb.

She had arms and legs, but didn't feel them, nor did she care to feel them. Nikita wanted to curl up in a ball and sleep herself the way through rest of her life. She didn't want to face it any more.

She was numb.

Nikita supposed that Madeline's news was supposed to be good, a relief of sorts. Her father ended up being a great man with many skills and talents. He had been a great husband and father to another family, something that Nikita could not fault him for.

But she was still numb.

Her childhood had taken a different look once she had found out about Roberta, the woman who didn't want Nikita to succeed in any way. Now, there were lists of what ifs strung out in Nikita's head about her father.

What if he stayed?

What if he knew about her?

What if she lived with her father?

What if they were a family?

What if he could have saved her this pain?

Each what if was painful, killing Nikita's soul. Michael saw it and there was nothing he could do but allow Nikita to face it. She had been so strong in the past few weeks that Michael had no doubts that she could figure out what to do now.

Yet, it was clear that Nikita didn't feel like making a decision. She didn't feel like reading about her father and learning about his other family. In some ways, it made Nikita feel more slighted that she did before. She was gypped of everything that she wanted in life. That fairytale dream life could have happened. Her father was alive all this time.

For all those years she told the classmates that her father was dead, she was telling a lie without knowing.

And he was close.

Less than an hour away from where she was now.

He was living, a life of a partial retiree from the United States Navy, practicing medicine when it suited him or when someone needed it. He volunteered at the local hospice when he wasn't babysitting his grandchildren.

There was a garden in his backyard. He had won some local awards for growing vegetables.

He played chess and on Sunday mornings, after church, he would go to the park and play against some of his old Navy buddies that had settled in Belgium with him.

His wife passed away a while back. She was from Belgium and the reason why he didn't return to the United States. He loved the States, but he loved his wife better. Dr. James Joyce gave up his family in the United States, only to go back when his sister passed away. He went back to school for a few months in order to practice medicine in Belgium. He worked in research along with family practice for several years, trying to cure cancer. When his wife died, James Joyce decided that it was better to spend time with the family that he did have, than to continue his research.

But he didn't know about Nikita.

She looked at her life and thought that he would shove her away, perhaps blame her for everything that had happened in her life. What if he really felt for Roberta and felt that Nikita had ruined her mother's life. What if he blamed Nikita for Roberta's life? Those were factors stopping Nikita's thoughts. She didn't want to be blamed any longer. She had lived a horrid life, one that she wished she hadn't had to live through.

But no one could make it better. Her father couldn't make it all go away now. He couldn't even fix the damage that was done.

But he could make the memories worse, by placing the blame back on Nikita.

She didn't want to be just a mistake. She had that stigma for long enough with her mother and didn't want her father to label her in the same unjustified manner. Because she did matter.

Then there was a larger question to think about. What was the motivation behind Madeline breaking and telling the truth? Not only had Madeline provided information about Dr. James Joyce, but also she had recent videos and location of where he was. She even had a telephone number and a list of a common schedule of activities. It was clear that Madeline had known for some time about him and had been watching him. Why did she wait till now to inform Nikita about him? Was this just another plan? Or did she care about Nikita?

"You think Madeline wants me to see him?" Nikita questioned as she turned her head and looked in the direction that she felt Michael was standing. Michael blinked his eyes and nodded his head, but Nikita couldn't see his movements and his reaction. The darkness was blinding both of them of the truth and Michael struggled forward to wrap his arms around Nikita.

"I think it was a hard decision for her, Nikita. In many ways... in giving you the location of him... and knowledge of him... It is putting you in front of Section One," Michael tendered. Nikita leaned her head back and felt Michael's breath on her neck and shoulders.

"I've always thought that he wasn't dead... It was a dream.." Nikita whispered as she turned her head, barely glancing towards Michael. Michael's eyes were soft and ready for anything. They started to melt Nikita further as the tears rolled down her face.

"I think it is going to take time... to accept this... but to also accept that you can watch him and know about him... but not be able to contact him..." Michael smoothly stated, knowing what was the next step in Nikita's mind. She looked at Michael and started to crack.

"So it is like he is dead..." Nikita stated as she dropped her head down to her chest. Michael pressed his lips together. He didn't see how this was going to resolve happily. Nikita couldn't go and tell this man who she was. He would find out the truth and his life would be in danger. Michael knew that Nikita wouldn't want to do that to anyone related to her, but the truth was, she needed him right now and Michael was torn.

"No... he is alive, Nikita... Madeline wants you to see him from afar... to learn about him from the other journal... and what we have found..." Michael spoke as his voice wavered. He wanted to take Nikita to the man right now and reunite the father and daughter. But it sounded so easy, neat and clean. And it wasn't. The man might even deny Nikita and that wouldn't help Nikita at all.

"And there is a lot of information, Nikita... Madeline must have had Birkoff working on this..." Michael continued as he felt Nikita struggling to keep her balance and not to fall far into the abyss once more. Nikita pounded her head back in Michael's chest from the pain, but Michael didn't let go. Instead, he held her tighter.

"But I won't hear the stories... I won't find out about my grandparents... and how they celebrated holidays... I won't know any of that!" Nikita screamed out as she kicked her right foot out. Michael dropped his hands lower, around Nikita's stomach and waist and held onto her. He hated seeing her like this. He kissed her earlobe and felt her melt back into his body, giving him the power.

"We can go to the town... and just watch him... that will tell you a lot, Nikita.." Michael stated as he moved towards the bed to sit down. He felt that Nikita limply allowed her body to be half dragged and half carried along the path. Michael settled down on the bed near the headboard, leaning back and keeping Nikita tangled in his grasp.

It was the barrage of things that made this worse. Michael found that in all situation, he worked better when he knew all the bad things and all the facts and details. Additional facts always threw things off. This was terrible the process that Nikita had been place in, learning the details slowly and surely. It was as if Madeline had mapped off a phasing plan of when to reveal Nikita's real childhood to her. Michael was apprehensive that there would be more, something coming around the mountain that was going to throw them off track once more.

If Michael couldn't take much more, he was sure that Nikita wouldn't be holding up much longer either. Although, Nikita had always been a survivor.

"You know, Nikita... You look like him," Michael stated and Nikita turned her head and cried freely. She struggled against Michael, but it made no difference. Michael knew that he had to hold onto her for Nikita's own good and his own sanity.

"No..." Nikita struggled out. She truly didn't know. Michael had seen all of the files and all of the surveillance that Madeline had handed over to them. He watched hours of James Joyce. Michael saw the resemblance and dropped his head. Nikita could feel so much better if she just looked at the material.

"You do... You have his blonde hair... although his is gray today... and his eyes... are so blue..." Michael commented as he stroked his long fingers in Nikita's hair, hoping for that connection.

"You just described Operations!" Nikita hissed and Michael physically jumped. It had been ages since that name had been out of Nikita's mouth. He hadn't expected to hear it now, but soon found out that it was an attempt by Nikita to hide from the truth that she was going to have to look at.

"He has grandchildren he loves dearly, Nikita... He is tall... like you... Strong.." Michael stated as he carefully adjusted his body to better watch Nikita. Nikita switched her eyes back and forth, making her decision to talk difficult. Michael allowed a sigh out. He was frustrated and wished that Madeline would have thought better about the timing of her announcement. It would have been easier if Walter were here to spell Michael at the continual pressuring of Nikita to talk about this.

"I never looked like my mother... Everyone told me I would have been a daddy's little girl," Nikita whispered as her voice crackled with overflowing emotions. Michael nodded his head and pressed his head down to Nikita, letting her know that he was right there and supporting her. He knew that in many ways, she knew that he was there, but it was that physical touch that Nikita needed, squeezing her and soothing her.

"You should look at him, Nikita... You have his face..." Michael slowly stated. He wasn't going to push it. Nikita looked up at Michael and covered her mouth with her hands. Michael reached down and brushed at the bangs that were falling down from her pulled back hair. He didn't attempt to brush away the tears, knowing that Nikita needed to feel them and they were part of the healing process.

"I'm afraid..." Nikita gradually admitted as she dropped her hands from her lips. She looked at Michael and then looked up at the ceiling, wallowing in the pain that she was feeling right now. It was quite clear that Nikita in some way, wanted to keep this pain, to make it stay alive because it made it more real than if she faced the issue.

"Afraid of what?" Michael questioned softly. He wanted to know the answer. There were thousands of answers that Michael could think of and he knew that there could be perhaps millions of others. He waited and then kissed Nikita on the shoulder, knowing that she was ready to do this.

"Afraid that once I look at him... I won't be able to stop myself..." Nikita stated as she blinked her eyes back and forth. It was a blank stare with eyes that suddenly dried up of all tears. Her mind was working and Michael softly smirked, but knew that Nikita didn't see it.

"Stop yourself from doing what, Kita?" Michael urged Nikita to respond with further details. Nikita shook her head back and forth and stopped as she looked at Michael's hand on her shoulder. She knew that she would be able to look at the files and the pictures. She would be able to discover the man who was her father. Michael would support her and then he would stop her.

"I'm afraid... that once I see him... and if I watch him... that I will want to talk to him... and that scares me..." Nikita stated and Michael blinked his eyes. Talking could happen, but with the way that Nikita was right now, it wasn't feasible. Nikita wouldn't be able to maintain a cover story. She wouldn't be able to be someone else. In her mind, she would be his daughter and would want to throw her arms around the man.

"We can arrange something, Nikita... You may never be able to tell him that you are his daughter... but you may be able to talk to him..." Michael tried to elucidate. He looked at Nikita and she shook her head back and forth. Michael dropped his head.

Nikita wanted to run to him.

"First you have to see him... look at the files, Nikita... We take this one step at a time.." Michael stated clearly, knowing where Nikita's head was going. Nikita nodded her head jerkily up and down. She took Michael's hand as she turned to face him. She was panting.

"But you know... I'm more worried that if we try to contact... that he doesn't go for it... or he doesn't buy it... and what if... What if Madeline finds a way..." Nikita stated and Michael shook his head.

"A way to tell him, Nikita? Do you think that it is realistic?" Michael questioned and Nikita shrugged her shoulders as she started to cry again. Michael tilted Nikita's head back and stared into her eyes.

"Michael... I've been numb... since I heard..." Nikita started to explain. Michael nodded his head. He knew this and understood this.

"If you break before we have this solved, Nikita.... Maralah's life... all of our lives are in danger..." Michael warned and Nikita nodded her head. She consciously knew that. It was the thing that was helping make her more numb.

"It's something that I want... I want to know him.. . and if I push away now... maybe I won't need to know him..." Nikita mustered out. Michael shook his head back and forth. The statement was ridiculous. Nikita now knew. She was going to want and want and want. Michael didn't want Nikita to regret losing this opportunity. There weren't many times in Nikita's life that things went as planned or times in her life that she was given a good opportunity. This was a good opportunity and Michael didn't want to see it wasted.

"Nikita... one step at a time..." Michael informed Nikita, touching her face as he looked profoundly into Nikita's eyes. She chewed on her lip and nodded her head.

"Michael... I want to see him!" Nikita cried out as she threw her hands around Michael's neck. Michael hugged her and swallowed.

The light was coming out once more.

A new day was being born.

And for Nikita, she was having a new life begin, with all the good things finally being in it.

A daughter, Maralah. A husband, Michael. Good friends, Walter, Birkoff, Alsena, Calantha, and Mick.

A father.

Nikita had a father. And the weight of hearing that was finally being lifted off of her heart, allowing the freedom to come. The freedom to enjoy knowing that she had a living and breathing father.

*

"That is true," Madeline commented, as she suffered through Walter's third degree. He stood, tense in her office, with his hands on his hips, shouting out his questions, over and over again.

"And you told her?" Walter yelled, angry about the way that the discovery of Nikita's father had been handled entirely. First, he was upset and outraged that he had to learn from Calantha. Second was the fact that Madeline just gave Nikita all the information and expected Michael to handle it all by himself.

"Yes. She was shocked. Michael is handling it," Madeline stated as calmly as she could.

There was an added layer of problems in this situation, not with Nikita, but with Walter. There was no way to stop Walter from finding out things that should be between Madeline and Calantha only. Walter had a very open relationship with Calantha. For all Madeline knew, there were no secrets between the two of them and when one was worried, the other would tell all. There were some things that Madeline wished that Walter didn't find out right away. It would have been better if Walter didn't learn this from Calantha. This was something that he needed to hear from Nikita.

"Michael can't handle this! Nikita needs me!" Walter cried out as he threw his hands up in the air. Madeline clenched her jaw and waited for Walter to turn back towards her. He was controlling the conversation here and Madeline had lost control the moment Walter walked in. "Can I go up there?"

"No. As I said, Michael is handling this," Madeline stated and Walter shook his head. Madeline was sad, knowing that Walter wasn't going to drop this. She knew Walter. Walter, in all ways, had become a father to Nikita during her stay at Section One. This was a threat to his identity and Madeline wasn't sure if Walter's reaction was caused by wanting to help Nikita or wanting to make sure that he didn't lose that position.

"Madeline... Michael won't be able to handle her! This is her father. Do you think she is going to stand back, learn about him, and not go see him? Are you insane?" Walter roared as his fists slammed against his legs. Madeline was shocked. She hadn't seen Walter this upset before. From his color, Madeline was worried of what else Walter was doing.

"Walter... you need to calm down..." Madeline whispered as she attempted to take control of this conversation.

"Me! Calm down! Is that what you told Nikita when you told her! Did you tell her not to worry about this! Not to think about this!" Walter shouted and Madeline dropped her head. This was almost getting too personal for Madeline's taste.

"Walter... Nikita was shocked... She didn't yell and scream... I think she was taking in the information that I was giving her..." Madeline spoke in a measured voice, if anything, trying to calm Walter with her voice.

It didn't help at all.

"Shocked! Is that what you would call it! I would say that Nikita's life had been flipped upside down once again by your hands. When does it end? Does it ever end? Or do you truly want to hurt Nikita psychologically to the point that she can't function any more?" Walter demanded as he slammed his pounding fists into his thighs. His anger was growing considerably with every second that ticked away.

Madeline needed to do something. And now.

"NO! I can't believe that you are agreeing with Calantha on this!" Walter hissed out and Madeline felt the dawning of understanding happening. Calantha had told Walter the truth, but in the end, had supported the agreed upon action that needed to occur that was made between Calantha and Madeline. Walter was probably upset that Calantha wasn't supporting him.

"Walter... there are reasons behind us doing this..." Madeline informed Walter; again, using a soothing voice, trying to bring down the anger that Walter was displaying a notch. It wasn't healthy for Walter to be this upset. His veins were popping out around his head and neck. His fists continued to pulse as he pulled them into tighter and tighter fists.

"I don't care about the reasons! I care about my Nikita!" Walter hissed out and Madeline shook her head back and forth.

"Michael's Nikita, Walter. Maybe that is an error in your thinking," Madeline commented as she attempted to reach out for Walter. His rigid body jumped back and Madeline frowned. Calantha would kill Madeline if something happened to her Walter.

"No!" Walter snapped as the tears started to form in his eyes. Madeline saw the exterior cracking and the real Walter reappearing.

"Walter... I'm going to sit here and explain everything to you..." Madeline enlightened Walter, knowing that the more he knew about Nikita's situation, the better that Walter would feel and be. If she felt it as is, Walter was likely to jump on his Harley and drive up to Michael and Nikita.

"I can't believe that you teased her with this..." Walter stated as he swiped at the tears, evidently upset that he was crying. Madeline finally was able to place her hands on Walter's shoulders and eased him to the chair. It was that action that finally made Madeline able to breath. She had been so worried about what was going on with Walter and his reaction, she almost forgot about herself. This was a stressful situation and everyone had to be ready for anything that could happen.

"Walter... Calm down... Once I tell you everything... I'm sure that you will see that this is not a tease..." Madeline warmed up to Walter, hoping that the hope and glimmer in her voice would pass on to Walter's mood. Although his head shook now, Madeline was sure that she could fix this in a relatively short amount of time. "I don't think that Calantha told you everything."

"She wouldn't listen to me!" Walter snapped and Madeline smirked. It sounded like they both did a number on each other. A sign of true love. Madeline didn't know if she could handle the relationship, but after all that Michael and Nikita had been through, Walter and Calantha staying together would be a walk in the park.

"Ok... Let me first say is that I am not limiting Nikita from seeing her father," Madeline revealed, hoping to get Walter's worse worry off of his mind. She saw that the effect of her words were immediately. He leaned forward, blinking his eyes, unsure of what this truly meant.

"What? That's not possible. He can't ever find out about Nikita...." Walter stated and Madeline sighed. That was a complication of the situation. She didn't want Nikita to make the contact, but thought that there were many ways that Nikita could talk to him, without revealing who she truly was and where she worked.

"I'm working on contingencies, Walter. She can talk to him as some other citizen... As long as she doesn't identify Roberta, he wouldn't even wonder who she was," Madeline clarified and Walter dropped his head. It did sound like Nikita could talk to him.

"She won't be satisfied..." Walter informed Madeline. He was positive that Madeline was thinking fully about what Nikita was doing. They were still factoring in other things inside of Nikita, that weren't right. She didn't hold hate for her father. In fact, Walter was sure that Nikita had given her father the credit for her making it through her childhood with a heart and soul.

"That is a hurdle that will be crossed when we get there... First is for Nikita to just watch him... And she hasn't identified that she wants that... Simple knowledge and videos of him might be enough," Madeline advised Walter of what she knew to be true. "I don't think that Nikita has even looked at the data herself."

"She has to be torn up about this," Walter stated as he shook his head back and forth. Madeline shrugged her shoulders, although she was nodding her head. Madeline's mind was saying that she really didn't know what Nikita was doing or feeling right now. Madeline's heart told Madeline that Nikita wasn't doing as well as expected, that this was another blow way too early.

"She has Michael, Walter. She may have needed you for her mother's journal... But I think this is something that she needs to do with Michael... and not you... because she doesn't want to hurt you," Madeline assessed and Walter wrinkled his eyebrows. He had followed most of Madeline's words until she started to speak about his feelings and reactions.

"How could my sugar hurt me?" Walter questioned and Madeline smiled. This was the reaction that Calantha predicted would occur. Walter had slipped into that father role for Nikita so naturally, that he had never thought about it in the way that it was being expressed now. Madeline sighed, realizing now that she probably should have told Walter this instead of Calantha.

"Because you think of her as your daughter... You would protect her with your life... and are proud of her... Sounds like a father to me," Madeline softly spoke, trying to make her words sound light and filled with laughter. It was ironic, and there were some ways to deal with it. You could either be mad, or you could laugh about it. Madeline wanted Walter to laugh about it.

"Nah, Madeline... Nikita is Nikita..." Walter stated and Madeline shook her head. She touched Walter and shrugged her shoulders.

"And who is sugar?" Madeline questioned. Walter tried to speak but then stopped. The realization of what Madeline was directly speaking about occurred. Madeline smiled as Walter dropped his head. "I know you didn't know... it was never challenged... but now.. it is... But none of this is going to change your relationship with Nikita."

"What if she doesn't need me anymore?" Walter questioned and Madeline rolled her eyes. That was never going to happen.

"She will need you. She will call you and she is going to hound you. We both know Nikita will always go to you for help," Madeline casually spoke. Madeline paused and swallowed, thinking back to a time that she wouldn't have ever been able to admit something like that to Walter. There was a day in age that Nikita's father would have just been killed.

"I guess I was wrong..." Walter admitted as he hung his head down. Madeline nodded her head slightly.

"I guess that happens from time to time..." Madeline joked. Walter lifted his head and sadly smiled. "And Calantha is going to understand."

"I said some bad things, Madeline," Walter winced. He remembered how loudly he had yelled at her. Walter leaned his head back and felt a new batch of tears forming in his eyes for what he had done to Calantha.

"And I said some bad things back, Walter," Calantha spoke from the doorway. Madeline raised her eyebrows and smiled. She was glad that Calantha had come in now.

Walter needed her.

Calantha needed him.

Another match made inside of Section One.

Madeline sighed and stood up, knowing that Walter and Calantha needed some time alone.

~~

"Something smells good," Michael complimented as he walked into the kitchen. In one gliding movement, he wrapped his arms around Nikita and nuzzled at her neck. He felt Nikita's body vibrate with the slight laugher that came from her mouth.

Happiness.

Michael loved feeling like this now. He was able to enjoy the simple things, and try not to dwell on the larger things. Nikita had made progress. It wasn't much, but she looked at the files. It was a start.

"It's just some mac' and cheese," Nikita spoke as she turned her head and kissed Michael. He smiled as she pulled away to continue stirring the noodles. Michael pulled away some plates and headed back to the stove.

"One of the mares is pregnant.. Next year I think Maralah would love to be around the foal," Michael spoke as he handed the plates to Nikita. Nikita blinked her eyes and then shook her head. She wasn't quite sure what she heard, but she was sure that she was wrong.

"What?" Nikita finally questioned as she filled Michael's plate and handed it to Michael.

"The one girl horse... Fila... She is pregnant.... I thought that Maralah would love to work with the foal, or the baby, when it is here," Michael stated and Nikita wrinkled another eyebrow up. She understood that, but something felt wrong.

"I thought horses only gave birth in the winter?" Nikita questioned and Michael smirked as he picked up a fork and started the noodles.

"This is good..." Michael stated as he turned and looked at Nikita. She was making her plate and then heading back towards the table. Nikita sat down and stared at Michael. "What?"

"Explain this to me again," Nikita ordered and Michael raised an eyebrow. Nikita didn't have much food on her plate and Michael frowned. He didn't like it when Nikita didn't eat.

"She will be pregnant almost a full year... of course... I don't know how far along she is... the man down the road told me... I thought something was wrong..." Michael stated and Nikita blinked her eyes. She felt as if she had stepped out into the twilight zone. Nikita leaned on her hands and Michael stopped talking.

Michael continued to eat, as he had walked and jogged a long way today. He was happy to be back in the house although.

Nikita was thinking about all that Michael said. She knew the mechanics, but felt odd about what was going on. For all the talking that she had with Michael of late, talking about a pregnant horse was non congruent with their discussions. It was too casual and unimportant.

"Which horse is the father?" Nikita suddenly questioned. Michael pulled his head up, noticing that Nikita hadn't eaten yet while he had finished half of his.

"I don't know," Michael stated and Nikita nodded her head. Nikita dropped her fork and Michael raised an eyebrow. "Why don't you try to eat?"

"I can't," Nikita stated and Michael lifted an eyebrow.

"Can't? You haven't even tried," Michael bluntly stated and Nikita pushed back. Michael was the one that now felt that he had been placed in another world. In his mind, they were having a perfectly good meal.

"I want to see him," Nikita decided, on the spot, right then. For days now, they had bounced around the topic and the timing. It was clear that Nikita wanted to see her father; it was just a matter of when and how she saw him.

"See him? When?" Michael questioned as he reached out in an attempt to grab Nikita's hands. She pushed her chair back as she swung her head back and forth.

"Now," Nikita stated. Michael stood up and moved towards Nikita. She was leaning back on the back two legs of the chair like Maralah did. Michael didn't yell at Nikita as they would at Maralah for doing the same thing. Instead, Michael pushed the chair back down and knelt down by Nikita.

"We have been over this... I think this is the first time that you have been clear... Are you sure?" Michael questioned and Nikita nodded her head. She had seen enough videos and tapes. She had seen enough articles and pictures. It was time to see the man in action. It was time to find a way to view him from a distance from the list of normal activities.

"Michael... I don't want to wait... The longer I wait... another day goes by that I could know him," Nikita stated and Michael nodded his head. But he also realized that Nikita might be asking for more than watching Dr. James Joyce from afar.

"You want to talk to him?" Michael questioned and Nikita nodded her head. She knew in her heart, that if she had too, she could talk to him without telling him who she was and who he was. That was something that she was going to have to do in order to know this man.

And Nikita needed to know this man.

"More than anything, Michael. I need to hear his voice... I need to hear it saying my name," Nikita declared and Michael sighed. He didn't know if he could do this himself. He didn't know if he could stand back and know that Nikita wasn't going to be able to hug this man. She wasn't going to be able to call this man dad or father. It was breaking his heart.

But Michael would do what Nikita needed done.

"I can do this, Nikita... But it might take some time," Michael warned as he planned in his head what needed to be done. A profile of who they were was going to have to be established, and it had to be deep. Michael knew that this man was United States Navy, and well liked. If he felt that something was wrong between Michael and Nikita, he would check them out and Michael needed the bases clear.

"How long?" Nikita questioned and Michael sighed. He knew that Nikita wanted to leave at this moment. She would pack up everything and run at this moment if it got her closer to her father.

"A couple days... to get a hotel..."

"We can stay in the car."

"To get a hotel..." Michael stated again. He wasn't going to be staying in the car. "To tell Madeline where we are going."

"She doesn't need to know."

"To tell Madeline where we are going and to tell her when we are going to be back. To talk to Maralah and tell her that we are taking a trip."

"She doesn't need to know either, Michael."

"To talk to Maralah. Cover our bases... I can make the profile close enough to our own real lives Nikita... And you need time," Michael stated firmly. He wasn't going to rush away to this man right now. Planning needed to happen, no matter how desperately Nikita wanted to see him.

"Michael..." Nikita whined and Michael shook his head. He wasn't going to become a victim to Nikita's tears and whines. This was something that had to be carefully done.

"Please, Nikita... let me make this as easy as possible... I know that I am asking for a few days... but it is just to make sure that this is ok... that this goes smoothly.." Michael pleaded with Nikita. Nikita looked and Michael and then nodded her head. Michael sat back on his heals and grinned. "Aren't you going to eat?"

"I can't," Nikita stated and Michael rolled his eyes. He gets headway on one problem and another one starts to flare back up.

"Upset stomach?" Michael questioned as he stroked Nikita's neck softly. He knew that Nikita often would cook just for him. It wasn't something that Michael liked. In fact, he hated when Nikita did this, but he had learned to accept it long ago.

"A little... from the stress... just too much stuff..." Nikita stated and Michael nodded his head. He clearly understood that. He was feeling the pressure of the stress on his shoulders, and this wasn't his entire childhood that was in question.

"Maybe you should go lay down?" Michael offered and Nikita shook her head. Michael stood up and went back to his seat, wishing that Nikita would go to the couch and take a nap. She looked exhausted in comparison to what she looked like when he had entered the kitchen.

"I want to be with you..." Nikita informed Michael as he lifted up his fork. "I'll watch you eat."

"Now that makes me nervous," Michael joked with a small and weak laugh. Nikita half smiled as she nodded her head. She looked up to the ceiling and sighed.

"Well... we'll talk," Nikita informed Michael as he took another bite. He felt Nikita's eyes watching him. It wasn't a feeling that he liked, but not one that he entirely disliked.

"About what?" Michael questioned after he had finished his bite of food. Nikita smiled and folded her hands on the table.

"Tell me about this mare and this foal again?" Nikita questioned and Michael laughed. He was sure that he would have to explain this a hundred more times before the baby horse made it's arrival.

*

Alsena walked through the park, looking for Maralah. Walter had brought her here for the day, but her mother was calling every hour to get in touch with her. Alsena believed it was best for her to go get Maralah so she could talk to Nikita.

But maybe the walk in the park wasn't a good idea.

Nikita wasn't the only one inside of Section One going through some bad times. It wasn't that Alsena could complain about her life. She loved and adored her husband and there was nothing in the world that Birkoff wouldn't do for her. She loved being like an aunt to Maralah. She worried for everyone else, but in turn, they felt like family.

But she couldn't have a child.

No matter how far Section One had advanced infertility technology, there has been nothing to help out Alsena and Birkoff have a child of their own. And it hurt.

Maybe it wasn't the children that were running around from the swings to the slide and back to the sand pit. It was the mothers, sitting on the benches, rocking a stroller back and forth with a new bundle of joy as they watched another child play. It was that image, the tiny babies that made Alsena want to cry and scream.

Maralah was one of the children running away from the swings and towards the tallest slide. There was a line and Alsena sadly smiled. She was going to have to wait for Maralah to come down before snagging her. It was going to take some time so Alsena wasn't going to be able to run away quickly.

Birkoff never really spoke about the situation. He could have the children. The problem was Alsena. Section One stated that they could get some donor eggs and even a sergeant mother to carry and child that would biologically be Birkoff's. It hurt Alsena, but she was willing to allow Birkoff to have that.

Birkoff refused.

If he was hurting over it, Birkoff didn't let Alsena know about it. They only spoke about the situation inside of the doctor's office. Alsena was positive that Madeline knew about it and that Birkoff probably told Walter, but she didn't think many knew about it. It was so personal and the pain cut so deep.

"Alsena?" Calantha called out and Alsena jerked her head up. She looked at Calantha as she waved from the bench that she was sharing with Walter. Alsena grinned as she moved towards them.

But Calantha could tell on Alsena's face that something was wrong. She rubbed her hands together and kissed Walter's cheek.

"What are you doing there? There a problem?" Walter instantly questioned. He was still hypersensitive about anything that seemed abnormal. He had been bothering Birkoff on the monitoring of Nikita's father and just communications in general. Walter wanted to know everything in order so he could demand that another problem be avoided.

"No. Not a problem. Nikita has been calling, trying to get in touch with Maralah... She called for the fifth time in five hours..." Alsena commented and both Walter and Calantha nodded their heads. By now, the main core knew that the plans were for Michael and Nikita to travel to Belgium and to get a visual reading on Dr. James Joyce.

"They must be leaving soon," Walter dejectedly spoke. Calantha rubbed at Walter's arm, knowing on some level, Walter wanted to be included on this trip.

"I think they are waiting on some more files to be uploaded to the F.B.I... and for Nikita to talk to Maralah... Oh... and Michael said if Nikita doesn't eat dinner they aren't going for another day," Alsena commented, the last part bringing everyone up to laughter.

"Well... Michael has to be picky with her... Nikita used to be skin and bones... Not fun to hug," Walter grinned out. He was happy to talk about Nikita like that. Calantha touched his arm, giving him more strength. Walter had to comfort himself with the thought that he was Walter and will always be Walter to Nikita. And Nikita would always be his sugar.

"Maybe you can drag Maralah off of the slide..." Calantha suggested as she looked up at Alsena. She saw the look in the woman's eyes. Alsena needed to talk. She looked like she was drowning in sorrow and Calantha didn't think that the inner core could handle problems with another person.

'Sure... you throw me to the wolves!" Walter commented as he pushed his body up with his legs. He felt his knees cracked and Calantha smiled at him.

"I'll make it up to you," Calantha winked and Walter laughed and started to move. He knew exactly what Calantha was talking about.

Calantha moved to the edge of the bench and touched it. The indication was for Alsena to sit down, and it took Alsena sometime to sit down. When she did, the bench gave her a clear view of the park, the children, and the mothers.

"What's wrong?" Calantha questioned. She knew some things that were going on inside of Section One, but not everything. This may have been something that she could have found out from Madeline, but it was clear that Alsena wanted to talk about it.

"You haven't heard?" Alsena questioned. In her mind, at times, she was sure that everyone inside of Section One knew of her problem and knew that she was only half of a woman or some sort of physical misfit.

"My days have been filled up with Walter wondering what his identify with Nikita will be any longer. I haven't had much time for anything else," Calantha stated back with a warm smile. She was definitely a different creature in comparison to Madeline.

The doctors had suggested that Alsena speak with Madeline for counseling. With the mess that she had created with Nikita, there was no way that Alsena was going to listen to that. Only a crazy person would go to Madeline after what she caused to happen to Nikita.

But Calantha was different. Of course, she couldn't believe that Birkoff's mother, her husband's mother, didn't know the bad news.

"I hope you weren't expecting grandchildren," Alsena softly stated with a shrug of her shoulders, trying to play off how sad she was about the events. But it wasn't something to be joked about and Calantha saw immediately through the veil of Alsena's humor.

"You should have told me..." Calantha immediately declared as she wrapped her arms around Alsena. Calantha wasn't upset that she wasn't going to have grandchildren through Birkoff, she was sad for Alsena and Birkoff. And she hugged Alsena as the tears came from both of them.

"I just haven't had anyone around to talk about it..." Alsena whispered and Calantha nodded her head. This was the time to pull away. Alsena was a different creature that Nikita. Alsena needed to talk about it.

"What is it? Birkoff?" Calantha questioned and Alsena shook her head as she touched her stomach. She looked around and found the strength. She needed to verbalize it, for this first time, outside of the doctor's office.

"I have no eggs... there are a few... but they are so immature... they can't sustain life..." Alsena stated as she again, resorted to humor to tell her story. Calantha swallowed and took Alsena's hands. This wasn't something that Alsena caused. It was a twist of nature that hurt, but not something that Alsena should feel guilty about.

"And there is nothing?" Calantha questioned. She may be a brilliant neurosurgeon, but that was where her expertise ended. Calantha often joked that if someone were having a baby, she would probably look at the head first.

"Well.. not with me... Birkoff can have a child through donor eggs... a donor mother because I have a malformed uterus... or just another woman totally... He wouldn't do it... And it's not fair..." Alsena stated. Calantha smiled. It was a terrible situation for the couple, but it showed Alsena something that she should be happy with.

Birkoff was happy and content with her alone. He didn't need anything else.

"Alsena... I know you are hurting... but Seymour... He can't do anything that would betray his heart... and having a child in any other way that wouldn't involve you... and that child being yours... He wouldn't do.." Calantha explained. Alsena dropped her head. She felt so guilty. She didn't want to stop Birkoff from having children. It wasn't fair.

"But he wants them... and he should have time!" Alsena cried out and Calantha shrugged her shoulders.

"Now is not that time... technology changes all the time... new treatments..." Calantha urged Alsena, but Alsena shook her head back and forth. She touched her hands to her face and swallowed.

"It won't happen... I can't.. ever... What is wrong can't be fixed..." Alsena stated and Calantha nodded her head. She understood and knew that the hope line wasn't going to help Alsena.

"Have you discussed this pain with Seymour?" Calantha questioned and Alsena shook her head back and forth.

"He has been so busy... and we know about it... We talked about it in the doctor's office... but we never speak about it... he throws himself into the work... claiming that it is for Nikita's good... or Maralah's good...." Alsena cried out. In many ways, when Birkoff does throw himself into the work, it makes her feel more inadequate and ill suited.

"It is his way of dealing with the pain... He unfortunately takes that from me..." Calantha wryly stated, trying to comfort Alsena.

But the conversation was soon done. Walter had finally picked up Maralah and carried her over his shoulder towards the bench. Walter knew from the look on Calantha's face not to mention what he saw. Instead he settled Maralah down on the ground and stood in front of her. Maralah was ready to run again when Alsena touched her arm.

"Your mother has been trying to call you... I think you want to go back with Walter," Alsena stated and Maralah's face lit up. She missed her mother so much. But then the smart girl looked at the adults.

"I'm not going back up there, am I?" Maralah questioned and Walter shook his head.

"It's not that they don't want you," Calantha started to explain, seeing that Maralah missed both of them deeply.

"I know.. they need time alone... That's what Madeline says," Maralah stated as she slipped her head down. Walter sighed along with Calantha. Alsena touched Maralah and waited for Maralah to lift her head.

"It isn't about them needing time alone... they need time together... It's different," Alsena calmly stated. It was casual and Maralah nodded her head. She could understand that. In some way.

"But I will get to go back to see them?" Maralah questioned and the adults laughed.

"Without a doubt," Alsena confirmed and Maralah smiled. She liked the sound of that.

~~

"Pull over," Nikita whispered as she picked her head up with her hands. Michael lightly smirked. Until about two minutes ago, Nikita was asleep. Michael was sure that it was due to the fact that she wore herself to the ground trying to make sure that everything was perfect.

"We are a few miles from a rest stop, Nikita. I'm sure that it can wait," Michael joked. He didn't like Nikita's tone, but nothing else indicated that he should pull over soon. He arched his back and settled into the chair. In Michael's personal opinion, they had already stopped one too many times.

"Michael... slow down..." Nikita mustered out as she braced her arms out on in the car. Again, Michael was almost amused with this behavior. This wasn't what he was expecting from Nikita.

"Don't you want to get into town in order to see your father play with the grandchildren at the park?" Michael questioned. He knew that this was the original plan before going to the hotel to check in. Nikita pushed back her hair as she shook her head back and forth, indicating no.

"I just want to get out of the car.... I should have never eaten that hamburger.... All that grease," Nikita complained and Michael shook his head back and forth. He needed Nikita to eat. It was something that he had required that Nikita do. She hadn't been eating well at home and Michael was concerned.

"You needed to eat..."

"I didn't need pure grease and fat Michael! You know my stomach can't handle it!" Nikita snapped as she lifted her head. Michael raised an eyebrow as he started to shift the car over to the other lane, seeing the rest stop was not far down the road.

"I'm sorry, Nikita... I forgot about what the road does to stomachs... we should have had salads," Michael dutifully remarked, taking the blame as Nikita had dished out. Nikita bent her head back and groaned.

Michael was starting to worry. He always did with Nikita. With all the stress and emotions the past weeks had, Michael wouldn't be surprised if Nikita was developing an ulcer. It wouldn't be a good situation, knowing that he had a scheduled five days in a town that was housing Nikita's father.

"Nikita... how long has your stomach been upset?" Michael questioned and Nikita rolled her head towards him. Her eyes looked blood shot, the aftereffects of not getting enough proper sleep. Michael tried to ignore that image and started to pull off the exit, as Nikita had requested.

"Since I woke up, Michael," Nikita smartly commented. She was being arduous again. Michael hated when her mood switched into this. It was difficult and almost down right impossible to get Nikita to work with him. She would be combative and pigheaded.

She would be Nikita.

"Nikita... you know what I meant..." Michael chided Nikita. Nikita was a very smart woman and it was when she was circumventing Michael's efforts that usually more problems occurred. It wasn't a good thing, but Michael unfortunately had gotten used to it.

"Just pull over! NOW!" Nikita snapped and Michael rolled his eyes. It was when he pulled the car into the parking spot and Nikita threw open the door, that Michael noticed how sick Nikita did look.

She was pale.

She was sweating.

She was running towards the bathroom, not even having the time to close the door behind her.

Michael turned off the car and leaned back in his chair. In many ways, Michael wanted to rant and rave at God for what was going on. He just wanted to go a full week without something else going wrong. Now, it was one thing after another and another.

However, as Michael looked towards the bathrooms, Michael didn't know if this was something that was separate from Nikita going to see her father. This could all be symptom of being nervous about this. There were a lot of things that could happen. This man could turn out to be something different than what Nikita was expecting.

Stress did seem to explain what was going on with Nikita.

Michael rubbed his hands together as he stepped out of the car. He was going to have to try to help Nikita through this. She needed to relax. She needed to sleep. Neither of those had been happening since she decided to come see her father.

Nikita was emerging from the empty bathroom and walking towards the water fountain. Michael moved to her and rubbed her shoulders as she held her hair to the side. It was clear of what happened and Michael didn't feel that he needed to ask Nikita what happened.

Instead, he rubbed at Nikita's shoulders as she stood up. She was a little warm, but Michael was sure that it was due to other factors. He knew that this was not a fever.

"We should get back on the road," Nikita stated as she started to pull away from Michael. His hands held tight. He wasn't done. Nikita's muscles were as tight as the wires supporting bridges. In a gently movement, Michael kissed the back of Nikita's neck and continued to rub.

"We have time," Michael stated, realizing that maybe it was best to just to get to the hotel and not to find her father on this day. The day of traveling was probably going to be enough. The excitement, or terror, of being in the same town as her father would be enough for the night.

"You have been great, Michael... I can't thank you enough..." Nikita spoke and Michael shrugged his shoulders. It was nothing. In his mind, he had to do this for Nikita. It was the only option. Nikita wanted to see her father and Michael was going to enable her to do so, trying to give her something that she had been denied as a child.

"I want you to tell me what you want during this trip, Nikita... If you have had enough... We can stay in the room.. or we can go back to the house... Just tell me," Michael informed Nikita. He didn't want Nikita thinking that since they had traveled all this way, that they had to stay the entire time and watch her father from the beginning to the end. That was clearly something that Michael wasn't going to enforce and in many ways, Michael hoped that they did deviate from what was planned.

"This is hurting Walter, isn't it?" Nikita suddenly questioned as she pulled away from Michael's touch. Michael blinked his eyes. He had spoken with Walter. He had spoken with Madeline. Walter hadn't mentioned it. Madeline had.

"He wants what is best for you, Nikita," Michael diplomatically stated, trying not to give Nikita something else to worry about. But it was clear, as Nikita turned away to head towards the car, that she had already thought of this. Michael rolled his eyes and moved after her.

"Nikita... honestly... You can't be worrying about him right now," Michael rushed out, trying to get the words out, hoping that Nikita head them.

"Can't worry about him? He is the only one other than you that has shown me what a father should be! He had been there for me. What if this doesn't work out and I need him? Is he upset enough to turn me away because I needed to see my father? Is he going to be slighted by my decision?" Nikita spewed forward, letting the emotions out as her hands raged through the air, conducting a mad symphony along the way.

"No!" Michael shortly responded. There were no other words forthcoming as Nikita yanked the door open and sat back down. Michael looked up at the sky; sure that something else was going to happen. It was just the pattern that they were living in right now.

"Nikita..." Michael whispered as he slipped into the car and looked over at Nikita. She was crying and Michael extended his hand to grab hers. With the touch, Michael elevated Nikita's smooth hand to his lips, pressing the kiss there. "Walter will always see you as sugar. That is something more than a daughter. Your relationship with him is different than anything else. And it is that uniqueness that will always allow you to have Walter on your side."

Nikita dropped her eyes, batting them as the tears started to form. She felt like she was losing control of herself again, but there was truly no reason for this all to be happening. Michael's words were so true. Nikita knew them to be true in her heart.

"Nikita... why don't you close your eyes... I'm sure you are going to feel better when you get some rest..." Michael suggested as he looked at Nikita. She looked ragged. She didn't look the part of a happy bride on a romantic get away that she would be tomorrow.

"Maybe that will help..." Nikita stated as she nodded her head in agreement. Nikita looked around and yawned. She didn't express to Michael about the looming feeling that something else was wrong. She didn't even tell Michael that she was still suffering from a churning stomach.

Instead, Michael's words put Nikita back to a state that she liked.

Asleep.

Because while she was asleep, nothing else could happen to her and she couldn't learn anything new.

*

Nikita stretched carefully on the blanket, pushing her body against Michael's. Michael grinned and happily kissed Nikita's cheek. He saw a smile in return, but was positive that it was part of the act that Nikita was required to continue in order to observe her father.

"You need more sunscreen," Michael commented as he leaned to the side and pulled at the bottle. Nikita leaned her head back, knowing that Michael was just being overprotective. They had been out in the sun for three days, and Nikita hadn't burned yet.

"Michael..." Nikita chided him as she started to roll away. Michael dropped the bottle and leaned his head to the side. He looked over to James Joyce and smiled as the young grandchildren ran around the older man. Nikita looked in the same direction, smiling at the blonde haired children laughing and jumping about. They were enjoying every moment of the time with him, and Nikita felt that she was slighted again.

"Jacob and Miles, right?" Nikita questioned Michael, of the names of the grandchildren. Michael looked to he boys as he shook his head.

"Jacob and Jiles," Michael corrected as he stroked Nikita's arm. He was concerned about this. In the profile, Michael had Nikita doing something more than sitting in the park and watching all day. Of course Michael and Nikita would go to the pool when the children would go to the pool, but it wasn't what Michael planned. It was shadowing her father all day long. She needed a break, but thus far, she hadn't listened to a word of Michael's argument for doing something away from the observation.

"And their father is Matthew," Nikita indicated correctly. Michael nodded his head. He watched as the two boys started to run away from James and Michael smirked.

Just like boys.

"He didn't have another daughter, right?" Nikita questioned. She had questioned this often. It was a concern that she would look like a daughter. But there wasn't a daughter. Michael had easily told Nikita this about a hundred times.

"He had a son, Nikita. There was only Matthew..." Michael drawled out, hoping that he could lure Nikita away from this. It was getting unhealthy.

"What about the rest of his family?" Nikita questioned and Michael tilted his head to the side. This wasn't something that Nikita had asked before, although Michael had. This was a giant step ahead for Nikita. Nikita would often at this point of the day point out that if James Joyce could have been with her mother, he could have been with countless other women and have huge amounts of children that he didn't know. Nikita would often spend twenty minutes arguing with Michael about this.

"His family from the states?" Michael questioned, trying to lengthen the conversation. Nikita nodded her head as she started to pick at the grass that was on the edge of the blanket. Michael reached over and took hold of Nikita's hand.

"He doesn't have contact of his family... I know that he had contact with a sister a while back.. but all other contact ceased when he decided not to go home..." Michael stated and Nikita shook her head. She wanted more information.

"Do we have visuals on this sister? What about his parents? What about other brothers and sisters?" Nikita questioned and Michael almost wanted to groan. All of what Nikita was asking was going to take time. And this was not a priority.

"Those are old files, Nikita.. Some of them haven't been transferred into the new system... It's going to take some time..." Michael stated and Nikita turned her head. She was following the boys. It was lunchtime and Nikita started to fidget slightly.

"There is another way to find out..." Nikita commented and Michael grounded his teeth together.

"No, Nikita. That is not an option. We have to maintain our distance," Michael corrected Nikita's thoughts instantly. For Michael, right now, there were no ifs, ands, or buts. He knew that Nikita toyed with ways for contact, but Michael vetoed them all.

But Michael couldn't control fate. And he couldn't control the two grandchildren who were running right towards them, full steam ahead.

"Go away, Jiles!" Jacob yelled with a giggle in his voice. He was rounding the tree when he tripped over Nikita's legs and fell to the ground.

"You went splat!" Jiles hollered with a roar of laughter as he pointed at Jacob on the ground.

Michael wanted to shake his head, knowing what was going to happen, but there was nothing that could be done. Nikita sat up off of Michael and moved towards the boy. "Are you ok?"

"Look what you made me do!" Jacob hollered at Jiles.

"Jacob! Jiles!" James Joyce hollered as he walked towards the two boys. Nikita looked up and swallowed as she moved her hands to Jacob once more.

"Are you ok?" Nikita questioned again. Nikita smiled as Jacob nodded his head up and down. Nikita was about to inch away when her father squatted down and touched Jacob.

"How many times have I warned you to watch who you run and trip over?" James joked with his grandson. Nikita smiled and pushed back her hair from her face. James smiled and extended his hand.

"James Joyce. I'm sorry about my grandchildren. I think their father gave them some extra sugar this morning," James continued with the light and humorous banter. Nikita shook the hand and Michael touched Nikita's shoulder.

"Boys will be boys," Michael dryly commented, wishing that this wasn't happening. He feared what would happen next, but he continued to stay calm.

"Nikita..." Nikita identified herself and she looked over her shoulder and smiled at Michael. She was remaining on profile thus far and she hoped that Michael would take that into consideration later tonight when he would yell at her. "And my husband, Michael."

"Nice to meet you. I have seen you here for a few days. New to town?" James asked as he pulled Jacob up off of the ground. The little boy bounced back quickly and was off running away from the other boy before Michael could respond.

"No... we are just taking a break from the city... It's very nice here... calm..." Michael informed James as Michael pulled himself off of the blanket to stand up with the man.

"Well.. if you need anything... Find me..." James offered as he looked around for the boys. By now they were on the other end of the playground, running for the monkey bars. "I have to get them... it's time for lunch..."

Michael watched as James trotted off after the boys. He was a good man and Michael smiled at Nikita.

He could see a lot of James inside of Nikita, although she wouldn't admit it right now.

"Lunch sounds good. Maybe we should go into town?" Michael questioned as he squatted down to Nikita's body again. Nikita looked over at the cooler and then back at Michael.

"I packed," Nikita stated calmly.

"Are you going to eat today?" Michael questioned and Nikita dropped her head. Michael knew the answer to that visual cue.

"Nikita... not eating isn't going to help..." Michael stated and Nikita shrugged her shoulders.

"I nibble... and I have huge dinners... I'm not used to eating three meals a day... I wasn't raised that way," Nikita shrugged off the comment from Michael. Michael allowed his body to fall to the blanket, realizing that no matter how much he asked Nikita to eat, that she wasn't going to.

Nikita watched as James rounded up Jacob and Jiles. They were heading into the park shelter. The residents of the town could get free lunches for the children. So while James got the children in from the sun and the heat, Michael opened up the cooler to start eating

Knowing that Nikita would focus on that door to the shelter until James exited with the boys and head towards the swimming pool.

~~

The rain was pouring and gushing. It was raining so heavily, that the rain was bouncing up from the sidewalks about eight inches before falling again into the rivers that used to be streets.

The blanket was now soaked as Nikita jogged behind Michael. It would probably never be dry again, but at this moment, Nikita didn't care.

She was never one for thunderstorms, but after the days of heat and oppression that had plagued them for these first three days, the dark clouds and flashes of lightening were a welcomed relief. Even if it meant that Nikita lost track of her father.

"Come on, Nikita! It's getting heavier!" Michael called out as he turned around and extended his hand. He didn't look happy, but Nikita couldn't stop from laughing. She knew that Michael realized her minor fear of thunderstorms, but she was having too much fun. Nikita didn't understand why she had the giggles right now, but it felt right.

"Michael... We can't get much wetter than this!" Nikita called out as she circled the blanket around her body in the middle of the street. It wasn't that any one was trying to drive in this weather either. Michael stopped walking and shook his head at Nikita.

"Am I going to have to carry you?" Michael questioned and Nikita started to giggle.

"Well.. if you carried me... I might have to take back my words..." Nikita stated with a sly smile crossing her face. Michael looked from side to side. He wasn't sure what words Nikita were talking about.

"What?" Michael yelled as the thunder clapped over them once again. Michael just wanted to get to the end of the street and into the small house that they were renting for this stay in the town. He wanted to get out of the wet clothes and to hold Nikita.

"Well... if you carry me... I think I might get wetter.." Nikita naughtily commented as she giggled. Michael raised an eyebrow. He was shocked with her words and swallowed hard.

It was a complete turn around from just a half hour ago, when Nikita didn't even want Michael to touch her.

"Don't tease me," Michael warned and Nikita giggled and started to run towards him. Michael was thankful to be finally moving towards the house and wrapped his arms around Nikita as they ran towards the house. Once up on the porch, Nikita dropped the blanket and turned to Michael.

"We could do it right here..." Nikita suggested and Michael swallowed. This was not the Nikita he knew, but he couldn't help but laugh with her.

"Because what I have planned for us is going to take longer than this storm is going to take," Michael stated as he looked at Nikita. The rain was cool and that had taken its effect over Nikita's body. Michael licked his lips and opened the door.

"I better get my clothes off here... Don't want to track water everywhere," Nikita stated as she pulled of the shirt and quickly dropped the wet bra on the floor next to it.

Michael shut the door and ran his hands on Nikita's skin.

He was missing that.

~~

"Lower..." Nikita moaned into the pillow.

Michael touched Nikita's back softly, hoping that it was the spot that Nikita was talking about. Nikita groaned in pleasure and Michael moved his hands against the muscles.

She was sore after their rushed session of lovemaking on the living room couch.

Michael loved rubbing Nikita's back, but she was rarely ever sore in her lower back. She didn't need further problems to occur. Nikita turned her head and smiled at Michael.

"More," Nikita stated and Michael continued to move his hands together. He was just happy to have Nikita smile and to know that she was truly happy.

"Nikita... Do you know what is going on with you?" Michael questioned. He knew that he was breaking Nikita's directions on how to make her feel better, but Michael wanted to know. There was a string of small things that were getting bigger and bigger. Something was wrong and Michael wanted to narrow down what it was.

"Stress, Michael," Nikita patronized Michael. It could be an answer, but Michael was positive that it wasn't the real answer. But Michael was almost sure that Nikita didn't know what was going on either. "Please continue..."

"Ok... Ok..."

*

"Maralah! You come back with that right this second!" Birkoff yelled as his slid around the corner, chasing behind the rebellious young girl. She was laughing as she sprinted down the hallway with the disk in her hand. Finally she had found a way to get some attention.

Walter pushed Birkoff and blinked his eyes. Chasing after Maralah was not the way to deal with this. Maralah needed someone to talk to her and have a heart to heart. Chasing after her was wrong. Walter knew that both Michael and Nikita would object to Birkoff's approach. Walter knew that Madeline had to be called in on this. It had been going on for two days now.

"I think she got Michael's running genes," Birkoff gasped as he slipped away from Walter and continued down the hallway. Someone was going to get hurt and Walter was sure that it wasn't Maralah.

Walter decided that it was time to take this up with Madeline. He was surprised that Madeline hadn't come out to join in trying to get Maralah to stop without chasing the young girl. But the disk wasn't that important. There were probably more pressing things to deal with than Maralah running down the hallways.

But this was a growing trend with Maralah. She was striking out against those who loved her because she wanted to get back to her mother and father. If Walter understood this concept, he didn't know why no one else had. Maralah needed to talk about what she was feeling. She didn't need captured and yelled at.

Madeline had been distant for days now. Yesterday, Michael called in to report that Nikita and her father had spoken and that Nikita did not break from the profile. Walter was proud of his sugar, but Madeline turned away, without a smile on her face. It was almost as if Madeline was outraged that Nikita didn't try to reach out for her father.

Talk about mix signals, Madeline was the queen of them the past couple months.

Walter inched towards Madeline's office. She had been working hard and Walter was almost afraid to interrupt. But deep down in Walter's heart, he knew that something had to be done. Alsena was starting to worry herself to death and Maralah was just a child.

"Madeline?" Walter called out as the door opened and she wasn't looking directly at him. Walter crept up closer to Madeline and saw her intently staring at the screen. "Madeline?"

"Mmm?" Madeline questioned as she squinted her eyes and moved closer to the screen, looking at something with great scrutiny. Walter frowned at Madeline's response. Traditionally she was sharp and quick at turning to other people. She was concentrated on something, so Walter decided to look at it.

What he saw was not what he had expected.

Being inside of Section One, Walter was used to things to find Madeline watching. She'd watch interrogations for the fun of it, or experimental torture techniques. When she was as concentrated and focused on a screen like this, it normally meant that it was a satellite picture from a terrorist group that was indicating something other than what Section One expected.

But it wasn't any of those things. It was an aged video of a man.

Walter was about to ask, but as he slipped back to stand away from Madeline, he realized who Madeline was looking at. The uniform was a good indication of what was going on.

"Madeline... Why are you watching the doctor?" Walter questioned. He saw Nikita's father there. In many ways, Nikita looked like her father. She had the same blonde hair and blue eyes. That was the biggest indicator around.

"These are old files... We are trying to catalogue the images so we can turn them over to Nikita," Madeline murmured as she tapped her long fingernails to the keyboard. Madeline didn't even lean her head to the side to tell Walter these things.

"So you can edit them? So Nikita only gets half a story?" Walter angrily questioned. He hoped that this wasn't true, but Walter couldn't think of another reason why Madeline would be watching so carefully at the details.

"No.... I wouldn't do that to Nikita," Madeline remarked as she flipped to the next clip. Madeline smiled as she looked at the man taking care of the children. Dr. James Joyce would have been wonderful with Nikita. He had always wanted to have more children, but his wife didn't.

"You used to do that to Nikita," Walter commented as he was confused by Madeline smile. He walked around the corner and looked at the screen again. He raised an eyebrow and his heart started to flutter. Suddenly, Walter was getting a very good picture about what was going on.

"Madeline.... I hope this isn't what I think it is," Walter warned as he settled down in the chair. The statement was serious and it gathered Madeline's attention. She lifted an eyebrow and then turned off the computer.

"I don't know what you are talking about. I'm just trying to update the files so that Nikita can know her father," Madeline defended herself. But the statement was rushed and it started to indicate to Walter that he was right before he even posed what he was seeing develop.

"Madeline... you like him," Walter bluntly stated. There was no way to play a mind game with Madeline. She was the queen, unless she was very concerned about something.

"I think he is a good man, Walter. He would have been a great father," Madeline stated out, trying to push Walter away from the thoughts that he was having.

In honesty, Madeline was plotting and creating for a wide variety of situations that may call for the need of Section One intervention. Although it seemed as if Nikita wasn't going to make the contact that Madeline was hoping for, Madeline needed Nikita to have her father.

"Madeline... he is an innocent. He can't know," Walter warned out, suddenly feeling like he was the only sane one around.

"I know that... and I also have been studying files of other people who have been treated like Nikita and the outcomes..." Madeline continued to speak, trying to force Walter to think about Nikita on this. Just because Madeline was enthralled with the great work that Dr. James Joyce did, didn't meant that she was attracted to him to the point of making sure that he was brought into Section One. "It doesn't look good..."

"Just the other day you were telling me to believe in the power of Michael? What is the truth? That Nikita is in serious emotional problems and needs her father to be brought into Section One or Madeline has an itch that was being driven by the good doctor?" Walter hissed.

"Walter..." Madeline stated calmly. She lifted her eyes and looked at Walter. She couldn't call her obsession with learning about James Joyce healthy, but she believed in her heart that she was doing this for Nikita, just in case it was needed.

But the man did interest her.

"Madeline... you can't even lie and tell me that this is entirely for Nikita," Walter stated coldly as he stood up. He couldn't believe this was happening. It was like everyone inside of Section One had suddenly gone insane. Madeline was falling in love with Nikita's father without every meeting him while Maralah needed Madeline.

"Walter... I have messed up... I underestimated how much abuse occurred to Nikita... I underestimated how badly Nikita was going to take these announcements... and I was hoping that if there was a way... that I could trick everyone... and allow Nikita to have that contact with her father that we both know that she wants and needs.... that it could make up for the mistakes... That one hug from her father, as he called her his daughter... would take away the pain that I mistakenly caused!" Madeline admitted as the tears started to roll down her face. Walter reached out and touched Madeline's face.

"And along the way you fell in love with him," Walter commented and Madeline nodded her head.

"I don't remember the last time I was in love," Madeline cried out as she lifted her eyes to Walter. Walter sighed and stroked Madeline's hair back.

"Paul," Walter commented and Madeline winced. There was a time that loving Paul was the only thing that mattered to Madeline. She didn't know if Operations ever really knew the extent of her love for him, and that she had been by his side until he went a step too far.

"And there was you... long time ago..." Madeline commented as she looked at Walter. She stated a time that was long ago, when both were young and green. Madeline wryly smiled. "And you were my friend... until I fell for Paul..."

"It hurt, Madeline... But I've been able to go on... With someone I can talk to everyday and not have to imagine a conversation with him..." Walter warned out, seeing the path that Madeline was allowing her heart to travel down. It was unhealthy.

"I'm not doing this for myself..." Madeline strongly stated. She was trying to make herself listen to her words. Now that Walter had called her on her attraction and passion for James Joyce, she felt the need to make herself fall out of love with him.

"Don't lie," Walter stated as he stood up once more. He shook his head. Madeline wasn't going to be useful right now. He dropped his head.

"Why did you come here?" Madeline finally questioned. She couldn't argue with Walter. He was right. She couldn't lie about the attraction. She wanted to find a way to meet James. She wanted to find a way to fall in love with him and share in the joy of watching the grandchildren that Nikita often spoke about. She wanted to find something in the files, to make him bad, so she could fall out of the attraction.

It wasn't going to happen.

"It's nothing, Madeline... I'll deal with it," Walter dryly stated as he walked out of the office.

He was dazed and confused. And he was worried.

~~

James walked into the kitchen as Matthew, his son, poured a cup of coffee for both of them. Jacob and Jiles were taking a nap and James was finally getting a chance to sit down with Matthew and talk. It had been too long of a time since James got to talk to someone else other than children.

"I'm worried about you dad. You've been so quiet..." Matthew admitted. James shrugged his shoulders. There was no pain quite the pain of losing your wife, but James was finding out that time went on.

"I'm fine. I love the children... and I love the park," James commented as he reached for the coffee. He quickly sipped some and looked at Matthew.

"Maybe you would like to go out with someone your own age?" Matthew broached the subject. James shook his head. He couldn't even think about it. Too many years had passed. He didn't want to meet anyone new.

"Matt... your mother is gone. And she was the woman for me," James corrected Matthew. Matthew frowned.

"Was she the only woman while you were in the navy?" Matthew questioned and James swallowed the sip of coffee hard. He hadn't expected to hear that.

"I don't want to talk about that with you!" James hissed and Matthew rolled his eyes. He was a grown man, but sometimes, his father would make him feel like a child.

"Dad... You were in the navy during the war... It wouldn't surprise me... to hear that there was someone else..." Matthew commented. He was very mature himself. He knew the ways of the world. The mother of Jacob and Jiles was not the same woman that now shared their home with Matthew. The mother decided that she couldn't take the stress. Luckily, Matthew was able to find someone who could love him and the children.

"Matthew... I don't want to discuss this..." James warned out as he struggled to sit down his coffee. It was clear that the topic was stressing James out.

"Come on, Dad... Mom used to stay that someone had stole your heart before she met you... Tell me about her," Matthew stated. James looked to Matthew and sighed.

The truth was, James didn't like to think about that time. He didn't like to think that sometimes Matthew's mother wasn't the woman that he wanted to be with. He regretted the moment that he was shipped away from NS Rota, because his life became something he wasn't quite sure he wanted.

It had taken James three years to ask Matthew's mother to marry him. Somewhere in his mind, he had hoped that his true love, the woman he left behind in Rota, Spain, would find him and save him from this life.

But as time went on, James loved his wife and his children. This was the life that he was meant to be and he pushed away the thoughts of Rota, Spain away. Having his son ask about it was scary.

"I was stationed in Rota, Spain... at the Navel Hospital," James started to explain as he looked up at his son. He smiled as he thought about the base. It wasn't the biggest and prettiest, but he loved Rota. It was twenty-five miles away from Cadiz and only seventy-five miles away from Seville.

"And there was a woman?" Matthew asked and James nodded his head.

"Roberta... a lovely woman... I saw her in the emergency room at the base... she had brought in a child... We were friends..." James admitted as he smiled. He couldn't help it. The memories of Roberta were bright up until the moment he was shipped away from Rota.

"It is good to be friends... but it changed, right?" Matthew questioned and James nodded his head.

"We were going to Seville... to the Los Remedios district for El Alumbrao," James stated and Matthew looked at James. Matthew didn't know what James was talking about. Although they liked in Belgium, Matthew's Spanish was rudimentary at best. "El Alumbrao is the first night of the April Fair... there were casetas everywhere..."

"Casetas?" Matthew questioned, wondering if he was going to ruin the spirit of the story with his questions.

"They are like circus tents... merchants set up their stuff in them... It's a wild time... Like the famed Mardi Gras in New Orleans," James commenting, connecting the unknown to something that his son did know. Matthew loved New Orleans during Mardi Gras time of the year and was always pleased when he company sent him on business there.

"Did you fall in love with her there?" Matthew questioned and James shot his head up. He couldn't believe that he was talking about Roberta right now with his son.