Operations walks into Ayn's office with a smile as Ayn sits down at her desk, thinking that Operations had continued on to his own office.

"I didn't see you come in." Ayn says as she looks back at Operations.

Operations just nods and smiles.

"Stephen is doing good." Operations says softly.

"Yes. He is." Ayn says while watching Operations. They had gone out to dinner together that night. It wasn't on a social need, but out of need. Both needed to escape the Moscow substation, but also, they were watching Stephen from a distance. Ayn could admit to herself that she had expected the evening to be long, but it was quite fun. She now pushed that idea out of her head, knowing that to protect her son, she needed to push Operations far away, and quickly.

"I enjoyed tonight... maybe we can do it again." Operations says in a slow manner, watching each word he said. He slides his hands into his pockets in a casual way, but he was only doing this because he was extremely nervous. Ayn extends a hand towards a chair, and Operations pulls out his hands and sits down.

"Viktor... it was a change." Ayn says slowly, trying to admit the night was nice, but not trying to gather more of Operations attentions.

"I found myself feeling more at peace here in Moscow." Operations starts to admit slowly. Ayn raises a hand to him.

"I am not here to offer advise... I punched out several hours ago." Ayn says in a serious but joking manner.

"I understand... but I thought we might still be able to talk like we once did..." Operations says slowly and turns his head.

Ayn smiles with the comment. Immediately images of the two sitting next to the Statue of Liberty, on one of the rare trips without Madeline. The mission was extremely easy, and they had gotten very drunk that night. The morning light was just expanding as they sat near the statue, just talking.

"You are smiling." Operations says, stopping Ayn's memory.

"I was remembering." Ayn says to correct the statement. It was easier to state the truth to Operations on the little things in order to hide the bigger things.

"I remember a lot." Operations says, reaching a hand out to Ayn. Ayn lets the hand touch.

How easy it would be. How much her heart jumped out to take Operations once again in her arms and keep him for herself. How easy it would be to deny all that she saw in his eyes... how easy it would be to claim him like lost baggage.

Ayn had gathered a good bit of information from the dinner. One of the major things that she noticed is that he had a great knowledge of the goings at Headquarters. Ayn knew he must be regularly watching several hours of tapes each night. From some of the comments, it even sounded like he resorted to listening to rumors.

The second thing is that she knew he was trying to change his relationship with Anna. Ayn knew that when Anna called Walter, "DADDIE!" it was the last straw. It was a rare day that Operations missed a phone call to Anna.

But it was the third thing that brought the dualism of feelings to Ayn. Operations was seriously thinking of going back to Headquarters. Ayn knew it was not only for Anna and somewhat for Madeline, but she had this growing feeling that Operations had come to terms with Nikita, and wanted to make a better relationship. Now this excited Ayn, because it would protect her son, like her and Madeline had planned, but then it made Ayn a bit upset that she might not see Operations every day.

"No, Viktor." Ayn says pulling her hand away from his touch.

************

Operations looks at his hand, that just a few seconds ago was touching Ayn's, and now it was alone.

"What did I do?" Operations asks softly. Ayn looks into herself, muttering that this is not about her. If this was about her, she would not have pulled away.

"I feel that you have some issues to resolve with other parties before you can even think about me." Ayn says softly, and folds her hands on her lap.

"YOU DO?" Operations replies in a surprized voice. Ayn looks at a spot, just a little off to the left of Operations and knows she must continue.

"I first believe... that you really love Madeline... down in that heart, you must resolve that." Ayn says, knowing in one way, she was sending him back into the arms of the person she at one time hated, and in another ways, sending him further away from her secret.

"Ayn, I LOVED you too.... we must not forget that." Operations says softly, but firmly. Ayn crosses her feet and continues on.

"And what about Nikita? I had a feeling that you wanted to make things better." Ayn says, avoiding the comment.

"That will only come in time." Operations says, and Ayn shakes her head.

"No time but this time." Ayn says with a half smile. Operations drops his head and frowns.

"I know of these issues... but also believe they will all resolve themselves." Operations says.

"You have to go back to Headquarters and talk to them." Ayn urges.

"I was thinking of staying here." Operations says bluntly.

Terror runs through Ayn's body. She would end up telling Operations, and destroy her son's life. NO! She must get him to go back, the sooner the better.

"And what about Anna?" Ayn asks softly. Operations swallows.

"Then why don't you come to Headquarters with me?" Operations says after a long pause. Ayn smiles and nods her head no.

"I'm sure you will be here for a while still... and when you finally go back to Headquarters... I will have to be here to watch that not all of the operatives head for a vacation at the same time." Ayn says with a laugh.

"Ayn, I really did love you." Operations says, looking into her eyes with a glowing smile.

"I know." Ayn admits, and easily understands that it is the truth. "And, I will always be here for you." Ayn adds on. That comment alone has made operatives run out of her office.

"I know. I don't know how to thank you enough... Stephen is almost back... just a little bit longer, and I won't be afraid to leave." Operations says standing up. He leans down and kisses Ayn's forehead.

Ayn watches him walks out before touching her palm to the place that Operations had kissed her. All the feelings that she swore to herself that were gone, all flooded back. Chanting over and over again... I can't.. I must not.. I can't, Ayn turns and looks at the three year old picture of her son. If she can't.. her son may never be his true age.

Send suggestions and comments to ranma.
OR
If you would like to send a comment to Nikita507, click HERE!!