ATTENTION: Stories marked with an * may contain material which would be better appreciated by those over 18. Parental Discretion is advised. This is your responsibility, not ours."Final Exam"
"You wanted to see me?" asked Michael, stepping into Madeleine's new office. Inwardly, he tensed, preparing himself for more questions about Nikita and her whereabouts for the last six months while she was supposedly a prisoner of the Freedom League. Had Jurgen said something to Madeleine? Had he hinted at the truth? Michael felt a cold trickle of sweat slide down his back. Madeleine leaned against her desk and smiled at him."Do you remember Beth O'Brian, Michael?" Michael was startled. "Yes," he replied, vastly relieved. "What about her?" Beth had been a captive of the Section and was now a recruit. They had used her to bring down her terrorist father. She was now training to be a counselor in Psych Rehab, after Madeleine had decided her abilities to heal the human psyche would be of use to Section One. Beth was an innocent. Birkoff called her Pollyanna, which wasn't too far from the truth. But she was a Pollyanna who had endured through great terror, pain, and hardship. She had never been involved with the out-of-control criminal behavior of her psychopathic father. In fact, she had been one of his victims. "Beth is nearing a critical point in her training," continued Madeleine. "We need to assess her ability to counsel Section operatives who are trained to conceal their emotions, to hide their true thoughts and feelings." Madeleine tilted her head, looking at him thoughtfully. "I want you to test her, Michael. Consider it a final exam for her...." "What exactly do you want me to do?" Michael asked warily. He suspected Madeleine also had testing him in mind as well as Beth. "You'll go to her for counseling. Tell her you have some unresolved problems you're dealing with." Madeleine placed her hand on Michael's shoulder. "That much is the truth, anyway. She won't be surprised at your visit..." "But what about...." Michael began. "About your history with her?" Madeleine completed the sentence for him. "It will make it that much more challenging for her. You tricked her into getting into the van; you're the one who brought her into the Section. You roughed her up, beat her black and blue...." Michael averted his eyes from Madeleine. What she was saying was only partially true. He had brought her in, but had never beaten her. He and Nikita had used makeup and other effects to simulate the appearance of a beating. When it came down to it, he had been unable to strike the helpless girl. Madeleine continued. "She won't trust you, Michael. She may resent and fear you as well. That, and your ability to conceal your feelings will be a good test of both her abilities and her willingness to bring you out and try to help you." Madeleine smiled at him. "You're the ultimate challenge, Michael. If she can get you to open up and trust her, she can do it for anyone." Figuring Michael out was a challenge, even for Madeleine. She hoped to gain some insight into him using this new angle. And Madeleine was confident in the formidable abilities of Beth to do just that. She was looking forward to observing them together through the hidden cameras. "When do we start?" asked Michael. "This afternoon. I want you to retrieve her from her workroom in Psych Rehab and go to the Lodge. You'll have your session there." Madeleine walked around her desk to her chair and sat down. "That will be all, Michael." Michael nodded and turned on his heel. He strode out of the room and down the corridor toward his target, Beth. ************ The Lodge was the newest building on Section grounds. It was only accessible by walking past the jogging trails and park area outside. It sat at the end of a path in the woods. It was meant for meetings that required complete privacy. Or, at least, the appearance of privacy. Michael knew the cameras that were ubiquitous in Section One must be there as well. Inside the hallways Michael and Beth had no way of knowing what the weather was like outside. Both were unprepared for the onslaught of rain that besieged them as they exited the door to the jogging trails. It was a full scale thunderstorm; lightning crashed around them and the wind blew the rain sideways into their faces. They were soaked instantly. Michael had intended to warn Beth of the intentions Madeleine had for her about their session and coach her on what to say during their walk to the Lodge. He abandoned that plan. Taking her hand in his, he said simply, "Run!" There would be time to discuss things when they reached some shelter. Beth kept her footing until just before the last stretch of path before the Lodge. The landscaping had not been completed on the areas by the rustic stone steps leading down to the building. Layers of mud had washed over the stones, loosening them and making their surfaces slick. Beth slipped near the top and went sliding down the path, landing hard against the bottom porch step of the Lodge. "Beth!" Michael yelled, running swiftly toward her. He almost slipped himself in the same spot. She sat up on the bottom step, grateful for the overhang that protected her from some of the rain. "I'm O.K.," she gasped as Michael reached her. "Just had the wind knocked out of me, that's all." She started to stand up, but Michael stopped her by placing his hand on her arm. "Don't move. Let me check you out first." He ran his hands lightly down her legs and torso and around her back and arms, checking for broken bones. She flinched when he touched her right shoulder. He noticed blood oozing through the material of her shirt. "Let's get you inside," he said. Michael lifted her up and they entered through the front door, just as the lightning flashed brilliantly, knocking out the power. The lights inside flickered, died, and came back on. Michael, holding Beth in his arms, looked around, noting the day-bed near the fireplace. "Let's get you on the the bed and out of that shirt," he said, putting her gently down. Beth laughed to cover her embarrassment. "I had a fantasy about you doing this, once," she said as he unbuttoned her shirt. "O.K., maybe more than once...." She blushed and confessed, "Maybe twice. Maybe three times.." Michael smiled at her and said, "Lie still." He looked around the Lodge, then walked into the bedroom and returned in a moment with some dry clothes and the first-aid kit. He eased the shirt carefully off her shoulder. "Owww," she moaned, when he touched it. "It's a bad scrape. You'll have lots of bruising, too. Can you move your fingers?" Beth moved her right hand up and laid it on Michael's forearm. "Yes, it's fine," she answered. As Michael cleaned and bandaged her injured shoulder, his eyes fell to the scar. He knew her father had burned her when she was fourteen, just for the entertainment. He had had no regard for human life, his daughter's included. Michael had become adjusted to seeing Beth's startling vivid red scar. He thought it only extended from the far side of her forehead, down against her ear, and down the side of her neck. Now he saw that the scar trailed its way down her shoulder, under her lacy bra and ended at her waist, a two inch wide ribbon of angry red. Beth turned her head to avoid his gaze. "Yeah, pretty, isn't it?" She said, biting her lip. Michael touched gently on the cheek, his fingertips lying on the scar near her jaw. "You're a very beautiful woman..." he said with sincerity. Everything about her was beautiful-- her blue eyes, white skin and black hair were a stunning combination; he admired her grace and compassion as well. "Don't!" Beth flinched away from his hand, then turned to meet his eyes. "Most men only think so in the dark.." she said in a low voice. Pain shimmered in her eyes. Micahel smiled at her. "Then most men are stupid," he said. *********** "There's nothing that isn't beautiful about you... " Michael told her. "Nothing on the inside, and nothing on the outside....." Beth closed her eyes and let out a breath in a long sigh. He had had the power to wound her deeply with a look or a word, but instead of wounding her, he had somehow healed her in a deep place inside. Michael got up and went over to the fireplace, giving Beth a little needed privacy. He took his time starting the fire and only returned to her side when the logs were well lit and flaming. He held out the dry clothes to her, sweat pants and sweat shirt, and asked,"Do you think you need any help with these?" "No, no," Beth said quickly. "I can manage." My fantasies might really get away from me then, she thought. "All right." Michael walked into the bedroom to change out of his own wet things. He returned a few minutes later, dressed in gray sweat pants and a black sweat shirt. He carried a towel over one arm and a comb in his hand. His long, thick hair was still very damp and curled in disarray around his face. Beth was wearing exactly the same outfit as Michael, except her top was bright blue. She was sitting on the floor in front of the fireplace, staring into the flames. Michael sat down on the daybed behind her and started drying her dark hair with the towel. Beth leaned back and relaxed, enjoying his touch. There was a companionable silence between them. Beth jumped when the power suddenly flickered twice and then went out completely. She turned her head and whispered over her shoulder to Michael. "Do you think the cameras are off now?" "Yes. I think they've been off since we've been here. It was the secondary generator that kicked in, not the main system." Beth turned around to look at him. "Michael, about this session you wanted. Madeleine told me I'm supposed to pump you for information about you and Nikita and your feelings for each other. This is just a set-up to trap you..." Michael smiled at her concern. He had already figured that out. "I'm not the only one being set up," he told her. "This is a test for you, too. A final exam, Madeleine called it. I'm supposed to evaluate your ability to counsel cold ops." He shook his head. "She thinks it will be difficult for you to help me because they believe you resent me for the beating..." Beth looked into his eyes. "Michael, I never got a chance to thank you for that. You and Nikita are the only ones in Section that I do trust..." "You'll have to pretend that you don't.." "No! I can't. I had enough of lies and games with my father. And here in Section the deception is almost as bad. I won't get sucked into it." She sighed and continued. "I made a promise to myself that I would never lie to the people I counsel here. They get enough of that from Section. Trust doesn't work that way." Trust. Michael closed his eyes. If he hadn't lied to Nikita so often before, maybe now she would trust him when he was telling her nothing but the truth. But, instead, she trusted Jurgen... ************ "Your turn, Michael," said Beth. "What?" Beth stood up and took the comb and towel from him, indicating he should sit in front of her. They switched positions and she carefully dried and combed the thick curls. Michael enjoyed the rare feeling of being cared for. "You have an impossible job," he said after a minute. "Finding the truth in Section One, healing the damage..." Beth laughed, still combing his hair. "Healing is impossible without the truth; I've learned that much." She went on. "I don't know that I've healed anyone in Section One. I haven't restored anyone to wholeness and joy. The best I can do is keep people from going over the edge.." "Like I said, an impossible job..." replied Michael. He didn't know any untainted souls in Section. Maybe Nikita and Beth came the closest... "No, you're the one with the impossible job, Michael." She smoothed a stray strand of his hair behind his ear. "I'm surprised there isn't even more suicide here, or slow suicide, like drug use. Given the total lack of support for the usual things that give life meaning-- love, marriage, children, families, friends. The only meaning allowed is the greater good of Section. But I don't think that's enough.." Michael turned around and took the comb from her and held her hand. "You seem to handle life in Section well enough..." He did envy her her ability to stay emotionally open, even here. "We all deal with adversity in our own way. You, for instance..." "What about me?" he asked, sitting down on the daybed next to her. "You control everything. Your emotions, I mean. Madeleine wants me to get under that control, to shake it a little..." She looked into his eyes. "Trying to do that is not really a wise thing. You need your defenses to survive in a hostile environment. Maybe once you got the control turned off you couldn't get it turned back on again..." Michael's eyes widened. She had just articulated one of his greatest fears. "The control is a defense mechanism, Michael. It's not who you really are..." "And who am I, really?" he asked quietly. ************ Beth smiled at him, her eyes resting tenderly on his face. She didn't look at him like Madeleine did, like he was some kind of specimen to be analysed. Beth's gaze conveyed respect, regard, and....love? He wondered. O.K., I'll tell you. I want you to feel 'seen'..." "Seen?" he asked, puzzled. "Like what you just did today for me, when you saw the scar..." Beth looked down, twisting her hands in her lap. "You looked past the surface. You saw the human being underneath...." She sighed, and went on. "It's what we all want, unconditional acceptance. To be seen for who we really are and be appreciated in our entirety, flaws and all...." "What do you see in me?" Michael asked. He realized some part of him was hungry to hear her answer. She touched him briefly on the cheek and smiled. "You mean, what do I see beyond the very attractive exterior?" She paused. "Inside, I see...nobility." She regarded him thoughtfully. "Nobility and strength and...sweetness. You're not one of the ones that enjoys the killing. It doesn't feed your ego. You're not power-tripping on death. You do what you consider to be necessary, but distasteful, to do." Beth touched him very gently on the shoulder. "You're basically not a violent person, Michael. Otherwise someone like Nikita wouldn't care so much about you, or you for her..." Michael let out his breath in a sigh. He felt his core had been stripped bare and all his emotions laid out before her. He felt his soul had been unwrapped from its cocoon and the butterfly revealed there had been seen and cherished. He felt some of his burden of pain had been released with the butterfly... "You're not like Jurgen..." she continued. "You're different from him." Nikita's words, he thought. Was Beth taken in by him, too? "Yes, very different," she said. Jurgen gets off on the power. He likes to manipulate people into trusting him and then hurting them.." Michael's jaw clenched. "Jurgen is like my father, who could be very charming sometimes. Nikita thinks Jurgen cares for her, but he's really just playing a power game..." Michael knew this was true. He hated to think about Nikita hanging around Jurgen, trusting him. It hurt like hell. "She'll figure it out, Michael." "What?" "Nikita will figure out you're a better human being than he is. He's confused her. He lies to her. He plays upon her fears and her insecurities..." Michael wondered why Nikita didn't see his love for her, why she couldn't feel it emanating off of him, in spite of his caution now. He felt it was plain in his eyes and in his voice, in his actions.. "You want my advice?" "Yes. Yes, I do." "Be patient. Don't abandon her. Be there to pick up the pieces. Let her know you'll always be there. And do something for me, O.K.?" "Anything," Michael said, smiling. ************ "Michael, I want you to kick Jurgen's butt. Smack that insufferably smug expression off his face.." Michael laughed out loud. "I didn't think you were a violent person, Beth." "I'm not. But I am human, despite what Birkoff thinks. I can get angry, too. I've had plenty of my own petty revenge fantasies... I've had some depraved thoughts in my life..." "You mean like your fantasies about me?" he teased, his eyes twinkling. "Hell, Michael,"she laughed. "Everyone in Section with a pulse has had a depraved fantasy about you..." She threw the towel at him, giggling. "Speaking of fantasies," he said, standing up, "What are we going to tell Madeleine? We should decide what to say." "Yes, I've been thinking about that." Beth rubbed her chin. "See, you have this loyalty thing about Section. You feel responsible for everything that goes on. It's the whole control trip you're on..." "You trained Nikita; she's your material." Beth went on. "So you felt really responsible when she wasn't performing and got put in abeyance. You felt guilty you had let Section down." Beth gestured emphatically with her hands, getting into her story. "It tore you up. You doubted yourself. Now that's she's back, you're over-anxious for everything to be perfect. Simply put, you're trying to hard. We just need to work on building your confidence, that's all..." She grinned. "How's that?" He was amazed. Smiling, he shook his head. "I thought you didn't want to lie?" "Oh, that's not lying. It's just speculating on an alternate evaluation of your problem." She patted his hand. "You poor, neurotic thing, you..." He laughed and this time he was the one to throw the towel at her. "What will you tell Madeleine about me?" she asked. Michael smiled. "I'll say you were very perceptive. You saw all my motivations clearly. That I rate you very highly as a counselor and..." "That I pass my final exam?" He laughed. "With flying colors. A+." "Thank you, Michael." She took both his hands in hers and said shyly, "There's something else I need from you.." "And what is that?" "We can't leave here.." She looked over to the rug in front of the fireplace. "Without doing something first.." "Beth, I...." Michael stammered. He found her tempting and attractive, but he was in love with Nikita. Her answer stunned him. "Marshmallows!" Beth cried. "We have to roast some marshmallows! Could we, please?" Twenty minutes later, they were both giggling, stretched out in front of the fire, having eaten almost the entire bag of marshmallows. They had skewered and roasted them on their fondue forks that they had found in the kitchen. "En garde!" Beth challenged Michael, raising her fondue fork. A lively fencing match ensued. Michael neatly knocked her weapon out of her hand with the last parry. Beth suddenly leaned back on the rug, clutching her shoulder. "Oww!" she said. "Beth! Did I hurt you? Let me see..." Michael stretched out next to her and pulled up her sweat shirt to check the wound. "I'm O.K.," she said, catching her breath. With his face so close to hers, Beth noticed a blob of melted marshmallow on his cheek. She kissed the spot lightly. "You're such a mess," she laughed, caressing his sticky cheek. Just then the lights came back on. They froze for a moment, Michael reacting first. "Was it good for you, too?" He said into her neck, laughing. "Michael!" Beth realized how it looked-- both of them out of their old clothes, lying in front of the fireplace, their hands on each other. "Oh, God!" Beth moaned. "They'll think we were talking Braille the whole time..." She tried to sit up. Michael held her down and caressed her cheek, not ready to stop his teasing. "You get a A+ on your evaluation, ma Cherie..." He kissed her gently, still laughing in the back of his throat. "Michael!" Beth said again, exasperated. She was thinking her reputation was now ruined... The cynical Birkoff would tease her.... She paused, realization dawning. Birkoff would never call her Goody Two Shoes again.. She laughed and kissed Michael back. "You can evaluate me anytime, Lover Boy.." She giggled. She kissed him again, thinking it was the most fun she had ever had taking a final exam. When they opened the door to the cabin a minute later, they saw that the rain had stopped and the sun was again shining. They walked hand in hand through the park back to Section One.
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