What follows are a few things I would CANCEL to hear Madeline say this season:
1/ Hello, little girl. May I play with your dolly?
2/ I WANT MY MOMMY!
3/ To hell with the big picture. LET'S BOOGIE!
4/ Oh, darn, I broke a nail. Does anybody have an emery board?
5/ (to Section's decorator) This office isn't me. Let's try chintz.
6/ (to Section's florist) I'm tired of bonsai. I want a Chia Pet.
7/ (to Rob, who's been tormenting the ladies of the LFN MB) Okay, Goatee Guy. Amateur hour is over. You're messing with the Big Girl now!
8/ (to Walter) But I don't WANT to be Snookums! Why can't you call ME Sugar??
9/ (to Walter) That ticking you hear isn't a bomb. It's my biological clock.
10/ (to the Torture Twins) Okay. For the last time: Those cases are for carrying Section-sanctioned equipment, NOT your lunches!!
11/ (to the Torture Twins) Tell me honestly. Are you two happy in your work?
12/ (to the week's designated Red Shirt operative as he/she dies a violent death) I TOLD YOU NOT TO GO THERE!!
13/ (to the late, not-so-great Jurgen) HEY! PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER!!
14/ (to Operations) You can stop sniffing at my hair. I've gone back to using Wella Balsam.
15/ (to Operations) KISS ME, YOU FOOL!!
16/ (to the Slime of the Week) Talk NOW or I'm bringing out the video of the Great White Whale.
17/ (to the Slime of the Week) Do the letters PMS mean anything to you??
18/ (to Birkoff) I hope you're flossing regularly.
19/ (to Birkoff) What do you mean, you don't lick off the frosting before you eat the cookies?
20/ (to Nikita) LOVE THE HAT!!
21/ (to Nikita) Okay, girlfriend. Give. Boxers... or briefs??
22/ (to Michael) Poor baby. You look like you could use a hug.