ATTENTION: Stories marked with an * may contain material which would be better appreciated by those over 18. Parental Discretion is advised. This is your responsibility, not ours.


Author's Notes:

******************* is a break in location or time (possibly both)

***///***///***/// is a time break of 16 years

-------------------- separates W's, B's, M's & O/M2's letters

===== indicate start or end of a letter

== indicate that the paragraph is in the letter

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ indicates Nikita's messages

@#@#@#@#@#@# indicates start/end of a flashback

Walter looked around the Section and sighed. Things weren't going well. Hadn't been going well since Jurgen's death. Nikita ignored Michael, Michael stared after Nikita. Operations was getting testy that his operatives weren't working up to par and Madeline didn't seem to have an answer on how to fix anyone.

Birkoff stretched. Sometimes watching the computers was boring, like right now. Not that he wanted to go out in the field! But sometimes he wished he could just make up a mission so that he would have some work to do instead of monitoring the systems!

******************************************************************************

Nikita stood in the door way of her apartment and looked over her renovations. She smiled. Everything was finally finished. But it wasn't the same. Carla was gone, she had no neighbor as of yet in Carla's old apartment. Michael hadn't been to see the place, not that she had invited him, but she had figured he'd show up sooner or later. She looked at the one thing she had kept from her old life in Section- her string of sunglasses; the rest of the apartment was completely new.

She made her way to the balcony and sat down to watch the sunset. Yet, what she saw wasn't the brilliant reds and oranges against the blue sky. What she saw were memories of the old apartment. Memories of Michael. Memories of Gray. Memories of the nights she had cried herself to sleep because Michael had lied to her or manipulated her. Memories of the nights she had woken in a cold sweat from the nightmares where Michael died or of what she had done. Then the memories of the nights when she and Michael had gone for coffee after a mission or when he protected her came.

She had tried to forget them all, the good and the bad, when she had been out of Section One. But, like now, they came to haunt her. One time she had been pouring coffee for someone and she saw a movement out of the corner of her eye, she had whipped around only to spill the hot coffee on the customer and the floor. Then there was the time she had been walking down a street and she could have sworn she had seen Michael. She had run to catch up with him only to realize she was not only making herself look like a fool but she was risking her life as well.

And when the memories came, her mind always brought up the memory of Michael's message telling her to get out, that it was a suicide mission and that she was free. She had accused him of having no heart, had told him that the real Michael would disgust her, when it was the real Michael that had risked everything he believed in to give her what she had wanted the most- her freedom.

And her mind replayed the words Jergun had told her about Michael- he loves you, he couldn't live without you. Walter had told her how Michael had shut down again after her 'death.'

Nikita closed her eyes, trying to stop the next images. The look in his eyes when he had told her he had to live his life split in two. The look on his face when they watched Jurgen die. The look on his face when he had stopped her and told her he would miss Jurgen, one of his first trainers at Section, and she had coldly turned from him. The look in his eyes lately as she avoided him.

Nikita had no choice but to avoid him. She needed the time to come to terms with her feelings. She needed the time to gather her defenses to survive Section life. She had needed the time to come to terms with what she was about to do.

******************************************************************************

"Michael, I'd like to talk to you." Nikita caught him as he was leaving his office the next morning.

"I have to report to Madeline." Michael stated tonelessly and turned away.

"All right." She whispered to his back as he walked away. "I'll just wait in your office."

When she entered, she wasn't surprised at the decor, it hadn't changed. She doubted it ever would. What she was surprised at was the screensaver he had on his computer. She thought back and realized that she had never seen a screensaver on his computer- ever. Now she understood why.

Instead of waiting for him to return, she left a note on his computer.

=====Michael, where did I go wrong? Please, just hear me out, rather read me out. I learned so much over my six months. Most of which you would be proud of. It is my return to Section that I am not proud of. You took the biggest risk when you took me on and how do I repay you? I hurt you more than anyone else ever has. For that, you will never know how sorry I am. I'd like to say that it was you that pushed me to Jurgen, but that isn't totally true. I had just as much to do with, no! I had more to do with it. I let myself get lost in the illusion he created. I let myself fall for something that was less than real, it wasn't even true. I wanted to punish you- to hurt you and I did. More than I ever thought was possible. Only recently have I begun to see the consequences of what I have done. And now I fear that it is too late to fix them.

==Maybe I was blind, maybe I just didn't want to see, or maybe before I wasn't ready to see. But I see now, boy, do I see now. You were my savior and you were my destroyer. I let you and Section have control over me, I let you hurt me. Then I took that hurt and aimed it right at you. And you never once broke under my anger. You will never know the respect I have for you. I may never be able to bear the pain as well as you or control my emotions as well as you can, but I hope, that one day I too will be able to bend as you did under my anger.

==Michael, you will always hold my heart. But you will never hold me again. I understand now why that has to be. I have done a lot of thinking these past weeks, through my time off, as well as my avoidance of you. I know that I will never allow Section One to take my soul. I know now that you will always be in my thoughts and that you are the one that will always catch me when I fall. I know that you hold my heart and I know that I hold what is left of yours. I will forever cherish that, Michael.

==But I will never look into your eyes again. I will never seek to make you show me feelings that you can't show. They are there, I would never have survived this far without you feeling something for me. I will never ask you to stop lying to me or to stop manipulating me. It is necessary, I see that now.

==Goodbye, my love.

==Hello, Michael.=====

******************************************************************************

Michael never saw the message Nikita had left for him until just before he left for the night. After he had spoken with Madeline, Operations had called him in. After that, he had gone to gym, needing to work past his emotions, especially his anger.

As he sat there, reading the note she had typed, he realized he had succeeded in pushing her away. He had succeeded in what he had started to do to protect them. So why didn't it feel right? Why did he feel like he had just lost his best friend?

Walter spotted Michael leaving that night and noted the slumped shoulders and the haggard appearance. He wondered what had happened now. He let the boy go, knowing if he asked, he would receive no answer. But he still worried about the boy.

Long after Michael had left, Walter worked on yet another one of his toys, thinking about the boy and the pain he had gone through in his short life. Walter had been around long enough to know that there were very few people in Section and in the outside world who could survive the amount of pain Michael had and still function normally.

******************************************************************************

"Michael, what are you doing here? Are you all right?" Nikita was surprised at his presence. Taking in the tiredness he couldn't quite hide in his eyes, she swung the door open and silently invited him inside.

Michael took in the new decor. She had changed. "I'm fine." Came his automatic response. "I like your new decor, Nikita."

Nikita smiled and shook her head. "Michael, it's after three o'clock in the morning, you didn't come here to see the place and comment on my new decor."

Michael allowed a fleeting smile. Same old wit. He turned to her. "I got your letter tonight." He whispered.

Nikita nodded. "I figured as much." Nikita shrugged. "You never stopped by before."

"You never invited me." Michael countered.

"You never seemed interested, Michael, but all of this is still neither here nor there. Obviously you came here for a reason. Why did you come, Michael?" Nikita asked the last question softly.

"Because of your letter." Michael answered softly. He didn't know how to take the first step. He looked around the apartment, searching for the answer there. He didn't find one.

"Michael, I know how hard it is but if you can't find a way, there is nothing more to say." Nikita started for the door.

Michael watched her and nodded. He had to find a way but being here was not the answer. "I am sorry I bothered you so late, Nikita." He stated softly as he passed her on his way out.

"Don't be, Michael." Nikita smiled at before she closed the door and leaned against it. That had to be the single most hardest thing she had ever done. Even killing for him was easier than lying to him.

******************************************************************************

Birkoff asked the question on everyone's minds. "Why isn't Nikita doing this mission? She is more suited for it."

Madeline glanced at Operations before she continued. "Because she isn't here at the moment."

Walter and Birkoff turned to Michael for further explanation but saw that he too was at a loss with this news. They looked at each other next, silently asking what the hell was going on.

After the briefing, Michael started for Madeline's office. He wanted to know where Nikita was. But Operations called him into his office for a special briefing.

******************************************************************************

When the mission was over and they had all debriefed, each of the three went back to their stations and each of them saw the gift. And each of them knew that their lives would never be the same again.

Walter picked up his wire sculpture and smiled. The note he read pierced his heart.

=====Walter, my love, as hard as this is to take, know that I am doing the right thing. I've seen so much in my short life, things no one should see and I can't even fathom what you have seen in your years here.

==Flirting with you has helped me to keep my sanity. And god only knows what I'll do without you to keep me informed and to make me laugh. This, I firmly believe, has to be done. I have to know that I have the ability to survive without him because one day, I know I will have to. I know that I can't live without him, Walter, but I need to be sure I can survive without him.

==Don't worry about me, my friend, I will get through and I know that I will conquer this mission of mine. Don't think that you won't here from me, that's what computers are for.

==Watch over Birkoff for me and make sure he doesn't overdose on the sugar he eats. And watch over Michael for me, make sure he knows that I am alive.

==Yours always, 'Kita=====

---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------

=====Birkoff, little brother, I know that you will miss me- who else will steal your sugar? But I will not stray far. I do have my eyes, Birky, so watch how much sugar you consume.

==Know, Birkoff, that I love you and that I will miss you but this is something that I must do. Proving to myself- and Operations- that I can indeed survive without Michael is one of the hardest things I will ever have to do.

==You have become my friend, Birkoff, and you will always be in my heart. You must promise me that you will watch over Walter and see that his smile remains bright. And you must watch over Michael, let him know that I am alive.

==I will contact you every once in a while, Birkoff, so be on the look out. Oh, and Birky, there's a package of oreos under your chair.

==Yours always, 'Kita=====

---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------

=====Michael, this one won't be quite so long as the last one. All that I ask is that you go on. I have become your weakness and there is nothing that hurts me more than knowing that.

==I love you, Michael, with all of the heart and soul that I have. I haven't done this to hurt you. God only knows how much I have hurt you in the past. I have to know that I can survive without you in Section One, Michael. Notice the word is survive. I already know that without you I won't live.

==Watch over Walter and Birkoff for me, Michael. I worry about them. The three of you have been my salvation in this place. Without the three of you I would have given up long ago.

==I'll try to keep in touch, Michael, but know that you will never be far from my thoughts. And if you are ever finding it hard to remember, play this song. Its title is 'The Dance' and it is sung by Garth Brooks. (Yup, country!)

==Your love, Nikita=====

---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------

Operations and Madeline were not without their own goodbye sculptures as well.

=====Operations & Madeline, the two of you have seen me through almost four years here at Section One. You have become, whether I liked it or not, my 'parents'.

==Madeline, through your guidance and your analysis you have shown me what a mother can be. And our teas have been a high point in my time at Section.

==Operations, you can teach Michael a thing or two about concealing emotions, but I know how difficult this job is for you. You know what I am referring to.

==I shall miss you both- if only because I loved to irritate you, Ops, or because you showed me how to live, Madeline.

==the loving thorn in your side, Nikita=====

******************************************************************************

Michael worked his way from Medlab to his office slowly. Crutches were the only concession he allowed for the bullet wound to his thigh. He looked over at Birkoff's station as he passed and spotted his wire sculpture. In his office, he took out his own gift from Nikita. He smiled down at it. This time it was easier to go on, he knew she was alive. She hadn't gotten in touch with any of them since her abrupt departure three months ago, but he knew that she was alive.

Looking up at the knock on his door, he told them to come in as he put the sculpture away.

Birkoff stuck his head in the office and told him, "You'd better come to my station, Michael." And then he was gone, moving on.

Michael sighed and grabbed his crutches. He wondered what was up now that was so urgent.

He found Walter at the computer station as well as Birkoff. As soon as he saw the screen, he knew it was worth it. Nikita had written.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ Michael, what are you trying to do? Get yourself killed?

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ Be careful! So, how is everyone? I am doing well. I like

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ my new substation. I still don't agree with Section

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ policies but I know that they will never change. I miss

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ you all so very much. Tell Operations and Madeline that

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ I said hi. And the three of you take care! N =)

Birkoff laughed. Walter smiled, he knew she could do it, he just hoped she came home soon. Michael wondered how she knew he had been injured.

******************************************************************************

"She hasn't changed." Operations stated after he had read the message.

"And she won't. She survives on her emotions and knowing that they are all doing so well." Madeline smiled. "She was right to do this. She needs to know that she doesn't need Michael's protection to survive here."

Operations nodded with a rare smile. For once Madeline hadn't realized the true reason Nikita had left- she needed to know if she could survive without having Michael by her side. He remembered Madeline's own rebellion many years ago.

"She didn't do this to find out if she could survive in Section without his protection, Madeline." Operations whispered.

The older woman looked over at him and nodded. "And what do you think is the real reason?" she asked, humoring him.

Operations grinned, knowing what she was trying to do. "The same reason you did this same stunt so many years ago. You needed to know if you could get by without me there. Nikita needs to know if she can get by if Michael suddenly wasn't there for her. May she, like you, never have to go through that."

Madeline's eyes shown with tears as she remembered that hell she had put herself through. And he was right, she saw now. She, too, prayed that Nikita would never have to survive without Michael.

******************************************************************************

"It's been four months. I wonder if something happened to her." Birkoff spoke his concern out loud.

Walter smiled. "Keep your chin up, boy. Nothing can keep that girl down. She's probably just busy."

"Or she could be right behind you."

Birkoff reached her first.

Nikita just laughed and hugged him, then Walter. "God, how I have missed you two! You haven't consumed your weight in oreos yet, have you, Birkoff? And, Walter, how are the toys? Got anything new for me to try out on my next mission?"

The two men laughed.

"What's so funny?" Michael walked out of his office.

Birkoff and Walter stepped away from Nikita.

Michael froze.

Nikita's gaze traveled the length of him. "I guess I am what is so funny. How have you been, Michael?"

"Fine." He whispered.

Nikita grinned. The patented Michael answer. Then she rushed him. "I've missed you, Michael." She whispered before she stepped back.

Michael kept a hand on her shoulder, not wanting to break the contact with her. "I've missed you too." He told her softly.

******************************************************************************

Operations smiled as he watched the scene from his tower office with Madeline. "It's good to have her back."

Madeline chuckled as she laid a hand on his shoulder. "Indeed it is."

***///***///***///***///***///***///***///***///***///***///***///***///***

Nikita smiled at the memories of that homecoming. It was so long ago and so much had changed since then. She sighed as she finally reached her destination. She knelt down and cleared the old flowers from the grave.

"You should have seen the florist's face when I requested each of these flowers. I could tell she was praying that I wasn't going to make a single bouquet with them." Nikita chuckled. "Each of them have their own meaning, you see. There is pansy because you occupy my thoughts; ranunculus because you were always so charming; acacia and zinnia along with a yellow rose for our friendship; alstroemeria for devotion; dahlia for your dignity and elegance; forget-me-not because my true love will always be yours; heather for my admiration of you; a peach rose because you live immortally in my memories; a dark pink rose because I will always be thankful for all that you did for me and that I had known you; the red rose and tulip are for love; rosemary for remembrance; sage for the great respect I hold for you and your wisdom; and the violets are for faithfulness and loyalty. Now you see why the florist was horrified?

"I can't believe how the years have passed, Michael. It seems like yesterday you were still by my side." Nikita whispered. "I can hardly believe I have been with Section One for twenty years now, Michael, and that you haven't been with me for fifteen of those years. Operations is gone now, as well. The new one is not as good as you would have been, but she will get better with time. Madeline will be gone shortly as well, I fear. Without our Operations, she is barely surviving.

"Michael, say hello to Walter for me, as well as Simone and your son and Operations. I know you are together up there, may you all be happy. I miss you all so very much." Nikita whispered, wiping a tear away.

"God, sometimes, Michael, I feel you are so close I only have to reach out to touch you. Thank you for watching out for me." Nikita smiled. "I can feel you looking down over me and protecting me even now. Lord knows I'm going to need your guidance more than ever!"

@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#

She had known it was coming, her dreams had been so violent and had all held one consistent theme- death. In her heart, she knew who it would be but there was no way for her to prepare herself. In the end, all she could do was watch it happen, the horror of the act forever etched in her mind.

He had taken her position because she was taking care of an unknown guard. She made it to his side and they continued on with the mission, thinking nothing of the extra guard- until they came to the room where the material was to be in. There they suddenly saw that the extra guard was a hint of what was to come. If they had only seen it sooner.

Michael ordered the teams to retreat, issuing the command as he and Nikita opened fire. They were split up as the ambushing forces rushed forward. She had gone left, he right. But ten minutes later, they had met up again down another hall way.

She noticed he had been hit once, in the left shoulder. He saw that she had been grazed on the right bicep and that she was using both of her weapons. As he was checking her over, he saw the movement behind her. He tackled her.

Nikita felt the three bullets enter him just before she saw the guard go down.

"Get out of here, Nikita." Michael ordered, his voice already weak.

Nikita refused. She put one gun away and hefted him on to her shoulder. She staggered under the extra weight but there was no way she was going to leave him there to die!

"Birkoff, give me directions out of here. Michael's been badly wounded." she hissed into her com link.

"Take a left at the . . ." And Birkoff's voice directed her slowly out of the compound.

"Get out of here, Birkoff." Michael ordered as Nikita lowered him to a bench in the van.

Her eyes glistened with tears as she began to look over his injuries.

"Birkoff, you'd better get a med team en route." She whispered brokenly. "Don't leave me, Michael." she pleaded as she did what she could to help him.

***********************************************

"Nikita." Michael whispered a day later in Medlab.

Nikita wiped her tears away. "Michael." She gave him a trembling smile. "You're going to be just fine. You'll be out of here in no time." She lied.

"Nikita, don't start lying now. I am sorry." He whispered, wincing with pain.

"Oh, Michael." Nikita cried softly. "I will never be sorry for the time we have had. You were my salvation in this place. It was you, Birkoff and Walter that brightened my days. And it was your silent love that protected me for so long. You'll never know how hard it was to be without you those seven months."

"I'll always be there for you, Nikita, my light. It was you that saved me. You gave me back my heart and along with it my soul. You were the light I needed to cling to in this life. I love you." He whispered. His last sight was of her: his angel's smiling face.

Nikita closed her eyes but the tears escaped anyway. "I will never forget you, my heart." she whispered as the heart monitor flatlined and his grip on her hand slackened. "I love you. I always will, Michael."

In Operations' office two hours later, she cashed in the favor he owed her. "You owe me, Operations. I want Michael's office and I want his house."

Operations stared at her. He couldn't get passed her haggard appearance. It was almost as if her light had died with Michael. He nodded as he wrote down an address for her.

"This is where he lives- lived. You have a week off, Nikita." He spoke softly. "I'm sorry."

Nikita offered him a quick smile as she took the paper. "Thank you."

She whispered before she turned to go. She had arrangements to make. Michael would be buried next to Simone and his son. She would see to it.

***********************************************

In the following days, Walter and Birkoff helped her move some of her stuff into Michael's home. But she left most of her stuff in the old apartment. She went out and bought new clothes and tried to heal her heart.

The day before she was to return to Section One, she went in to speak with Madeline.

"Nikita, how are you?" Madeline asked, for once concern coloring her voice.

"I will survive, Madeline." She offered the older woman a smile. "I can't become him, but I will become like him. I don't think I'll ever be as open as I once was. It will take a while, but I'll regain some of my light."

Madeline smiled at the younger woman. "If anyone can survive this, Nikita, it is you. Know that if you ever need to talk, I will be here. As are Birkoff and Walter, even Operations."

Nikita chuckled for the first time since Michael had died. "I know. But he blames himself because he didn't see the ambush coming. And Birkoff blames himself because he didn't know that the extra guards were there waiting for us."

"We all have to deal with the grief in our own way. We will survive, move on, but I doubt anyone will forget him." Madeline nodded.

She had talked with Madeline for a while longer before she headed to Michael's- no, HER office. On the way, she glanced up and saw Operations watching her. She sighed. They all blamed themselves for Michael's death- there should have something they could have done, something that they had missed. She waved up at the man and gave him a smile before she disappeared into her office.

***********************************************

Two years later, her wardrobe was basically black, a tribute to Michael, but she always worked in a bright color somewhere, whether as a scarf or outrageous earrings. She modified Michael's office slightly to better fit her own personality. She added her wire sculptures and a couple neon lights. As for her house, she left it as Michael had. She was comfortable there and it made him seem so much closer to her.

Nikita had her own recruits as well. She was harsh yet fair to the two recruits. She taught them as Michael had taught her- to survive she was hard on them. She didn't want them to die out there. Yet she joked with them as well. Section One had become her life and the missions she planned were as Michael had taught her.

Out in the field, there were times she swore he was still protecting her. Once, she had been caught by surprise by a guard. The man's weapon jammed as she shot him. Another time, when she remained behind in the van, as Michael had often done, to command the mission, something had gone wrong with one of the teams. She would swear that she heard his voice telling her to try something. It had worked.

Nikita smiled at the picture she had hung of Michael in her office. Birkoff had found it for her the year before. He gave it to her on her birthday.

"You still haunt my dreams, Michael. I think, though, I'd be afraid if you ever stopped!" She chuckled before she turned back to her reports.

***********************************************

"Walter, when you see Michael up there, tell him I love him." Nikita whispered as he slipped away.

The old man smiled before he closed his eyes.

"I want him buried in the same cemetery as Michael." Nikita announced to Operations and Madeline later that day.

For nearly two months, she reverted back to complete black outfits and her smiles were rare. It hurt when she went to Walter's old station to suit up and he wasn't there. Madeline had found an old picture of him that she hung beside Michael in her office.

***********************************************

Within the next ten years, she had easily become the top Section One cold operative. Her missions rarely failed but she still held her compassion for innocents. Operations had actually smiled after one mission. She had been successful- her teams had retrieved the material and none of the innocents that could have been hurt had been. Housekeeping hadn't been necessary.

But Nikita noticed the tiredness in Operations' eyes. She noted his slower moves and softer voice. She wondered what was wrong. She went to Madeline's office as soon as she realized he was keeping something from his operatives.

"He is dying, isn't he, Madeline?" Nikita was straight forward. She still didn't believe in not asking questions- even if she received no answer to them.

Madeline turned to her. "How did you know?" The older woman asked quietly.

Nikita was shocked. Operations? The rock of Section One, dying? "You mean he is? He looks tired and his movements are slow. Not to mention his voice is softer."

"The doctors give him another couple of months." Madeline was honest with her friend.

@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#

Nikita halted her words as well as the memories and let the tears fall silently before she leaned forward, kissed Michael's headstone and stood up. She moved slowly to the next headstone and cleared away the dead flowers and placed a single white rose for innocence on the grave before moving the next and clearing away the dead flowers and placing a orchid on the last grave.

"Simone, make sure he is happy up there." She whispered before the beeping of her cell phone disturbed the stillness.

"Nikita." She answered crisply, no trace of the emotion she had just shown as she walked away from the trio of graves. She had two more to visit before she headed back to Section. "I'll be there in an hour. It can wait until then." With that said, she closed the phone and hurried to the other two graves. She and Madeline had decided on burying Operations in the same cemetery as they had buried Michael and Walter so long ago. Walter had followed five years after Michael, and now, ten years later, Operations was gone.

With a tear and a sigh, she kissed Walter's headstone and whispered her love as she placed a hyacinth and a pansy on his grave before turning to Operations and placing a handful of violets and pansies on his grave.

"I miss you both." She whispered before she hurried out of the cemetery, her yearly ritual over.

******************************************************************************

"Birkoff, what is it?" Nikita asked as she breezed into the Section a half an hour earlier than they had expected her.

"Madeline was taken forty minutes ago. Women of Might." Birkoff stated softly. "I have a locale but it's too risky for a team. Justin thinks that maybe we should leave her."

"He's right, it is too risky for a team. Pull up schematics. And tell Kurt (Walter's replacement) I want my arsenal read in half an hour." Nikita commanded before she gave her friend a smile and headed to Justin's office.

"You are correct, it is too risky to send in a team. I am going in alone." Nikita declared as she entered.

The younger man frowned. "That is even more risky than sending in a team. If you must rescue her, send an operative."

Nikita allowed a small smile. "I value your opinion, Justin, but it is my decision to make. I am going to retrieve her. The Agency knows that I will do this my way. Besides, it isn't as if I wouldn't return, Justin. I've been doing this for twenty years now. You don't have to worry about me."

"Be careful, Operations." Justin smiled. She would never change, even with this new role she had been put in by the Agency and Madeline. She had been the best cold op for nearly fifteen years before the former Operations had died and she had taken his place. She knew the workings of Section, had the ability to do what she once thought she could never do- send others to their deaths and decide who lives or dies. Justin knew she still didn't like parts of it, but who did? She was good and that was all that the Agency really cared about.

******************************************************************************

Madeline waited for Nikita to come. She knew the younger woman would rescue her. They had been friends for so long and Nikita had never lost her belief that friends were important.

She remembered the night Nikita lost Michael. She had been with Operations in his office when they heard the cry echo through Section One. She had known in that moment that their protege had not survived the latest mission. Madeline had immediately left for Medlab. What she had found was not a sobbing Nikita, what she had found was an emotionless Nikita and that had scared her. Nikita, Madeline knew, survived on emotions, and she was afraid that the young woman would follow Michael. But Nikita didn't close out Birkoff, Walter, her, or even Operations. She remained open with them, it was just that she hadn't let anyone else inside. And then she had done her best to become like Michael, the best operative in Section One.

There had been such sadness that had never left the young woman's eyes and when Walter had died a short five years later, the pain had deepened. And again, when Operations was lost recently, Madeline had noted that Nikita's eyes held even more sorrow and pain. She hoped that the younger version of herself would not break with her death. Madeline knew that it would be soon.

******************************************************************************

Madeline watched Nikita on the drive back to Section. "I am sorry, Nikita. You will do fine. Just remember, count each day as a separate life. Be strong for Birkoff. Goodbye, Nikita."

Nikita squeezed her hand. "Goodbye, Madeline. Tell everyone Birkoff and I send our regards." No one was there to see her tears fall silently down her cheeks. In that moment, she felt so old.

Nikita and Birkoff buried Madeline next to Operations and said their goodbyes. In the end, it would be Birkoff who got Nikita through Section life and Nikita the one to get Birkoff through the years. Things had become so different than what everyone had thought!

The End


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