She looked up into the night sky and sighed. Not a single star in sight again. No moon to give her a guiding light. The clouds were covering them, keeping her from finding the age old lights that had served as her guide so many other nights in the past.

She didn't notice the tear falling silently down her cheek as she closed her eyes. Her life was like that, she realized, the clouds hiding her dreams and memories in the darkness, her guidance lost in the haze that had arose so suddenly. It had snuck up on her, the haze, much like the clouds had snuck up on the moon, until there was no light left to be seen. She didn't know how it had happened, when she had lost them- never realizing how important they had all come to be to her. All she knew was that everything she had once taken for granted was gone. And she couldn't find a way to return to the old; she couldn't find a way through the clouds to find any of them but especially him. She couldn't even call out for him; she knew he was long gone, believing of her what they had told him. Just as she had once, long ago, believed their lies about him.

The door squeaked open behind her and she turned her head quickly. It didn't matter what happened any longer. She had played their game, winning for so long, she knew that the loss had to come at some point. She only wished he knew the truth of that night so long ago.

The dark figure motioned her forward. The light from the doorway glinted off the gun in his hand, blinding her eyes. Eyes that were used to the darkness and the lies now, so unaccustomed to the light of day as well as the light of truth.

She remained where she was. She wasn't afraid; she refused to make this easy for them. If they wanted her, let them come and get her. With that thought, she turned back to the sky and glimpsed a ray of moonlight. She gasped. It was a sight she hadn't expected. Turning back to the man, she knew it was a sign. She tried to ease herself off of the chair but her muscles remained stiff, unresponsive.

The man in black moved forward then to help her. Time was running out. They had to move out. The light from the doorway framed him in a silhouette in his silent approach.

She smiled for the first time in over two months. "You think that you will kill them all when you kill me. They live, they survive, and they will prosper. You will never eradicate them. They will come for you one day, one day you least expect it, when you have let your guard down, believing they are all dead. I will have my due, you will see." She whispered. Then she kicked out.

He caught her foot easily- her movements were slow and weak. But the punishment never came. Only that soft voice, "I never stopped caring about you."

She looked up then, as the man leaned towards her, and nodded. "I'm sorry." She whispered softly. Haltingly, she stood- barely. Without his arm around her waist, she would have fallen. As it was, he half helped her, half dragged her out of the cell.

------------------------------------------------

That had been two weeks ago. He had gotten her out, the building had been leveled- with everyone in it, but she had slipped into unconsciousness as soon as he had gotten her in the van. And she hadn't woke up since.

"How much longer, Madeline, does she have?" Walter asked softly.

The woman turned and held up two finger.

"Two weeks?" The youngest asked. It was the first hope they had heard in his voice since he had come to the place many years ago.

"Two hours." The dark one whispered, closing his eyes and bowing his head.

"Two days." Walter smiled. "Thank you, Madeline." He whispered to her as he left the observation room. He was the oldest, been there the longest, knew the most. He knew what the woman had laid on the line for the life of this operative.

-----------------------------------------------------

They were all gone now, the dark one the only one remaining. He was asleep in the chair that had been placed by her bed for him.

The presence stole in quietly, not wanting to disturb the dark one.

"You were always his life. I never had the hold on him that you have. He needs you." And then the quiet one was gone. The needed words were said, it was only she that could make the decision now. End her suffering and magnify his or begin true suffering and end his.

----------------------------------------------------

The woman shook off the effects of the drug, moving her head slowly. The pain was great, her eyes were the only things that didn't ache, but the sight of him by her side was worth it.

"She survived." Madeline smiled, then turned from her computer to the operative in her office.

"Who survived?" The young woman asked, curious. The Section had been different since the operative had been brought in. Her own mentor bringing in the body, refusing to let anyone else touch her except the doctors in Medlab. He hadn't left her room expect to take care of bodily functions. Birkoff had brought him meals, as had she on occasion. She had always hesitated at the door, seeing the love that he held for the operative on the hospital bed. She had been beautiful once but the torture had marred her skin, the malnutrition and infections making her skin almost white.

"The operative Michael retrieved weeks ago." Madeline allowed an answer for the young operative. This one reminded her of the one in Medlab when she had first come tot he Section.

"Who is she, Madeline?"

"It does not matter now, Josephine." Madeline smiled.

Josephine- god how she hated being called that name!- noted how the older woman's eyes remained empty. "Who will be training me now?"

"For the next two days you will be free. Enjoy the days but report back here on Monday morning at seven." Madeline announced.

Josephine stared. "Thank you, Madeline. Monday at seven." And then she was running out of Section One.

------------------------------------------------

It was Sunday afternoon and the rain was pouring down, beating a rhythm through her speakers. She smiled at the simple sound but her mind returned to the operative in Medlab. She was familiar. And she wondered how the woman had captured her trainer's heart. He was distant and controlled- almost cold to everyone save Birkoff and Walter- and even to them you could hardly call him warm! He was a puzzle, doing anything required of him. Showing no emotions, no care as to what he was doing, whether it was taking out a hit man or preforming a hit on an innocent. She almost admired his detachment- almost. She refused to justify the deaths of innocents. Killing innocents, in her mind, equated Section One with the people they fought against. Oh, she did it- she had no choice- but it ripped at her heart.

Standing, she went inside, grabbed her long coat and headed out. She ended up at Section's Medlab two hours later. She hesitated outside her room. There was no sound coming from it and she didn't want to disturb the woman. Closing her eyes, she pushed the doors open.

The woman gave her a slight smile. "You are the one that helped Michael retrieve me."

"I am Josephine. But that's not my name. They want me to get used to hearing it."

"I am Nikita." the woman in the bed lifted a hand and waved to the chair. "Sit. Michael should be gone for a few more hours. I ordered him home to shave, shower, and rest. Madeline made sure he went for me. What is it that you want to know?"

Josephine looked startled.

Nikita chuckled softly. "They don't give the name Josephine to just anyone, Jo. They are the rare ones, the ones that hold their questions in their eyes for the world to see."

"Who are you?" Josephine started with an easy question.

"I was a Josephine many years ago, when I first came to Section One. I became Section material eight years ago- that's after two years of training. Michael was my trainer and my mentor up until two years ago. At that time, I finally proved to Operations that I could handle my own trainees and my own missions, not to mention my very own office. That was the time that I was reassigned to London's substation."

"But- but didn't Michael put up a fight?" Josephine exclaimed.

"There was nothing he could do. He didn't find out until two weeks later. Section's decision is final, Jo, that you must not forget. They will do what they must to get the end they need. They can not afford to care what they do to operatives, there is no time. It is a hard lesson to learn and even harder to swallow. It took me until my captivity to fully swallow that line. If you survive, Jo, you will eventually swallow that line for no other reason than because you realize that you can finally appreciate the light. There is only one way to fully appreciate the light- you must learn to value the darkness." Nikita's voice grew softer as she finished her words.

Josephine noted how pale the woman looked compared to when she had first come in. "I should go, you need your rest." She stood.

"Sit, Jo. You have more questions and I have the time. Pain is just something the mind makes up to get you through life." Nikita smiled. "What happened to you? I mean, I know you were held captive, tortured, but why?" Josephine asked after she sat down again.

"I was held for two months, Jo, and I was held and tortured to get to Section. I was the whipping post of sorts. When they- the New Cell lost against Section, they took it out on me. I am sure that they sent tapes to Operations, trying to get him to come and rescue me." Nikita halted her words at the outburst she could see coming from Josephine.

"He knew? He knew and yet he never lifted a finger to help you? The man is a cold hearted bastard!" The young operative swore. Her fury driving her to pace the little room.

Nikita chuckled. "I never said he didn't lift a finger, Jo. I just said they sent tapes." Nikita sighed, trying to find away to explain. "He didn't know where I was, Jo. And you can't risk operatives on the unknown like that. Besides, there were missions that saved thousands that the operatives were needed for. You and Michael got lucky, Jo, that is all." She shook her head. "They informed Michael, Birkoff, and Walter that I was dead. There was no sense worrying them. I had asked Madeline to do that before I left Section to go to London. I didn't want the three of them to worry about me if I was ever captured."

They talked, softly, about Section life, Section policies, and then finally about girl stuff. It had been years since Josephine could just talk about girl stuff to someone. Nikita made her feel comfortable. She was like a big sister.

Nikita chuckled. "Well, Jo, you better head home. Michael should be returning soon and I am getting tired."

Jo stood quickly. "I'm sorry, Nikita! I should have let you rest!" Nikita shook her head slowly. "No, you needed to talk. I will be fine, Jo, just fine. Just remember Jo, in order to fully appreciate the light, you must learn to value the darkness. It will be the only way you survive Section One."

Josephine ran into Michael at the door. She was looking at Nikita and nodding instead of looking to see if anything was in her way.

Michael steadied her and stepped aside to allow her to pass.

"Bye, Nikita. And thank you." Josephine waved, ignoring Michael, before she left.

"You should have been resting, Nikita. You need to regain your strength." Michael whispered softly.

Nikita smiled. "She needed to talk, Michael, more than I needed to rest. A Josephine?" She chuckled.

"It is her given name. She had gone by Joey and we can't allow that- Madeline started Josephine to give her a regal aspiration to reach. Her codename is Belle." Michael shook his head. Nikita still hadn't changed.

Nikita saw the pain in his eyes he tried to hid. She reached for his hand. "Michael, for whatever it is worth, she didn't lie to you for the reason they lied to you about Simone. I asked her to before I left."

Michael stared blankly, not acknowledging her words. "The doctors say that you will have very few and faint permanent scars, Nikita. I am glad." He switched the subject, keeping his walls in place.

Nikita sighed. "Have it your way, Michael, but it is the truth." She closed her eyes. "I am so tired."

"Rest, mon ami." Michael bent to whisper to her a few moments later.

Her breathing was even and slow, all the signs of sleep, but still she turned her head towards his voice, a soft smile on her lips.

"That is twice she has died and hasn't been dead- she's been held captive!" Birkoff blew up at Walter.

"Son, sometimes it is better to be resurrected." Walter chuckled.

"I am tired of their lies!"

"They lied this time because she asked them to. Nikita asked Madeline to tell us she was dead if she was ever captured." Michael spoke from behind.

Walter shook his head and rolled his eyes. "Of course she had Madeline lie! Michael, her concern has always been for us! She risked Operations' wrath for Birkoff when he freaked over being compromised in the van. She risked cancellation to come back to you, Michael. She worries about us, even when she was in the London substation. Her messages told me that!" He looked pointedly at Michael. "She worried that if she was captured and you knew about it, you would try to get her out. She didn't want it this way, you thinking it was Simone all over again, but she saw no other choice. She did not want you breaking because of her."

"They only told us two weeks before I found her that she was dead. She had been captured six weeks before that!" Michael shook his head. Walter rolled his but Birkoff was the one to speak. "The missions he had me view! I'd been monitoring simple infiltration missions for like two months. They seemed insignificant but he must have been looking for her! The operatives were searching the buildings extensively before they were leveled."

Michael stared at him but it was Madeline's voice that broke the silence after Birkoff's words. "Operations and I had been searching for her since the moment she was taken. Yes, Birkoff, those missions were probes to look for her. We had no idea where New Cell would hold her. Our only option was to probe their holdings under the guise of invasions. We could not tell any of you. We may not always keep our word about everything, but we saw the wisdom of Nikita's demand." Madeline explained. She turned to Michael and directed the next statement to him. "We could not afford you going after her. She had to be retrieved alive. Josephine will be ready to work with tomorrow at seven. It is what Nikita would want, Michael. She will survive and she will heal."

Michael nodded before he turned and headed for his office.

--------------------------------------------------------------

"Josephine, Nikita would like to see you. Michael, I would like a word with you." Operations interrupted their training session at 10 am.

Josephine nodded, then headed for Medlab. Michael followed the older man to his office. He waited for the man to speak.

Operations looked down at the operatives and pride flashed through his eyes as he watched them. Swiftly, he faced Michael. "There is no explanation for telling you so late. It was an executive decision."

Michael only nodded at the older man's words.

Operations sighed. "She wants to see you as well." And he turned back to watching the operatives.

-----------------------------------------------------

"Just remember what I told you yesterday and you will not only be able to survive, you will begin to understand the man." Nikita was telling Josephine when Michael strolled into the room.

"Guess it's time to head back to the drills." Josephine smiled down at Nikita. "Get well, Nikita. And I'll keep that in mind."

"See Birkoff, he'll set you up with some SIMMS until I return." Michael told her.

When Josephine was gone, he turned to Nikita with a slight smiled. "You wanted to see me?"

Nikita nodded slowly. "Yes. Michael, there is much that you do not know about the operation that did this to me. Please don't hold your anger inside this time." Nikita sighed. "There is so much I need to tell you, Michael, but your guards are up and I wonder if they will ever come down again. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to break your trust in me. There was so much I never meant to do that I did and so much I never did that I meant to do. Be careful, Michael, the past holds many of the secrets of our lives but the future holds them as well." And she closed her eyes. She was so tired all of a sudden.

Michael watched her drift off to sleep wondering about her words. He caressed her cheek and left. Josephine was waiting.

-----------------------------------------------------

"Let it go, Walter." Nikita whispered.

The old man glared down at her but his anger was at another. "He hasn't seen you in over two weeks! Dammit the boy should be shot!"

"He was, Walter. That's the point. He just returned from the mission. Jo informed me he took a bullet to the arm." Nikita smiled softly.

"Madeline ordered him to Medlab ten minutes ago."

"That doesn't excuse his actions for the last two weeks!" Walter stated.

Nikita sighed, she had no argument for that, just an attempt at justification. "He has to repair the walls that I destroyed, Walter. I broke his trust and he must repair it. I knew it would be slow. He has to deal with this in his own way. Let him go, Walter."

Walter shook his head. "You are too understanding towards that man, Sugar."

"Just as he was too understanding to me in the beginning, Walter. I have hurt him more than he has ever hurt me, even in the beginning." Nikita whispered. "I have hurt him so much, Walter, so much that I don't know what to do to fix it. All I can do is wait. I have to heal and so does he."

Walter saw the tiredness in her eyes mixed with the pain and nodded. "All right, sugar, I will let it go- for now."

Nikita smiled. "Good news, Walter, I am allowed to be wheeled around today! Care to have the honor of being the first to push me around?" Walter laughed. "I only wish you were up to what I had in mind! But I would be honored." And he helped her off the bed and into the wheel chair.

Nikita laughed heartily. "Thank you, Walter."

"Hey, Birkoff, what's up in the world of terrorists now? And how is the candy supply?" Nikita smiled as they wheeled over to Birkoff's computer station.

He smiled brightly at her. "How are you, 'Kita? The world of terrorists is alive and thriving. And the candy supply needs to be replenished!"

"Doin' better. I'll have Jo get you a variety. When she returns tomorrow, you'll have it!" Nikita smiled. "Walter, back to Medlab, Michael's room. He shouldn't be alone when he wakes up from the sedative."

Birkoff's eyes narrowed at the name. He knew the man had been avoiding her the past two weeks and he didn't like it at all. But he didn't say a word- he knew her feelings for him, knew that they wouldn't change- hadn't in eight years and everything that had gone wrong.

"Seymour, I have hurt him more than he has ever hurt me." Nikita whispered just before Walter pushed her away.

"Oh, Michael." Nikita shook her head. "You always seem to get into these scraps."

"Nikita?" Josephine spoke her name from the doorway.

Nikita turned and gave her a smile. "Come on in, Jo. What is it?"

"Operations wanted me to tell you that George will be here shortly- within the next few hours." Josephine was curious when she asked. "Who is George?"

Nikita's eyes narrowed and she inhaled sharply at the name. "The man is with the Agency. The Agency is who Section One answers to. They are our controller. George is the director of the Agency I believe. He is not the kind of man you want around for any reason- good or bad!"

Josephine nodded and was about to say something when a commotion came from down the hall- in the heart of Section. She left to find out what was going on.

-------------------------------------------

"Birkoff, Walter, is there a way to tap into the PA system without having a message broadcast in Operations' office?" Madeline came to them at Birkoff's computer.

"Sure. What is up, Madeline? Why is George here?" Walter asked. Birkoff who had been keying in a few commands to block the speakers in Operations' office, brought his head up at the name. "George? The Agency George?"

Madeline nodded to the young man then turned to Walter. "I haven't a clue, all I know is that no one must be allowed to speak of Nikita and her being alive- a directive of Operations." Madeline was honest with the older man.

"Attention everyone. At the risk of cancellation, no one is to utter the name Nikita. At the risk of personally finding out what the interrogation room looks like, no one is to speak of finding her and retrieving her. Have I made myself clear? Those of you who do not understand, see me and I will make it clearer. Anyone who arrives after this message must be sent directly to my office. Compliance with this is mandatory. Any one who finds themselves not complying- cancellation is the solution. No one is exempt!" With that announcement finished, she went back to her office.

Birkoff stared at Walter. Walter stared back at him- something big was going on. And the second in command didn't know what was going on!

--------------------------------------------------------

Nikita heard the announcement and sighed.

Josephine came running back to talk with her. "Walter, Birkoff and Madeline have no idea what is going on. I know you heard the announcement. Do you know what is going on?"

"Not exactly. Tell Walter to bring me my silenced toy- he'll know what I mean. I'll be here waiting, Jo. Hurry!" Nikita ordered her.

"Michael, be careful. Maybe one day I will be able to explain this to you." She whispered and Josephine was back a few moments later.

----------------------------------------------------------

Nikita remained in her Medlab room for the next two days. No one was allowed in her room except Madeline and Operations. George was still around, "inspecting" Section One

. It was the third day of her confinement to her room that she began to push herself to stand again. She struggled, forcing her weak muscles to begin working again. Physical therapy was good to keep them conditioned, but standing on them was another thing all together.

The next day, as George watched a mission at Birkoff's station, Nikita began to walk haltingly around her room.

It was late that fourth night that she heard someone approaching her room. And she knew it was time.

She was waiting, standing at the door when it finally opened.

"So you are here." the man whispered, a sinister smile on his lips.

"Of course I am here. I wish you could have stayed longer. It would have been nice to sit and chat, to visit, ya know?" Nikita mocked.

George noticed the gun in her hand then. Involuntarily, he took a step back. "You can't."

"Contraire! I can, George, and what is more, I am." She fired one shot to the heart.

He grabbed his heart and stared down at the blood.

When he had fallen, she put two more bullets in him- one through the eyes and another through the temple. There was no way she was going to mess with this one.

"Nikita, what have you done?" Operations whispered.

Nikita looked up from the body and smiled. She held out a container of disks. "These are copies but they can be verified. You will find that the Agency will be happy that George is dead. Well, maybe not, but they will not do anything to Section One or myself. I refused to let this one be allowed to play both sides of the fence."

"You should be in bed, Nikita." Operations nodded and stated before he turned and walked down the hall.

"Operations, you'd better call housekeeping." And Nikita's laugh followed him down the darkened hall.

----------------------------------------------

"What do you mean George was killed?" Nikita looked shocked with Michael's words the next morning.

"He was killed in Section late last night. The Agency, though, isn't doing anything to find out by who." Michael told her. Walter had forced him to go to Nikita's room.

Nikita sighed. She could feel he was uncomfortable in her room. She smiled at him. "If you back up from the bed, I'll tell you a secret, Michael." And Nikita pushed off her covers and swung her legs over the side of the bed.

"What are you doing?" Michael demanded as she moved to stand.

Nikita laughed. "I am going to show you my little secret!" And she stood then started walking towards him.

"You should take it easy, Nikita. It is too soon." Michael caught her after a few steps.

"No, Michael, it isn't. It's been too long, in my opinion. I was tortured, Michael, for two months. I have been recovering for nearly three weeks. I am going home this afternoon. Madeline says that I can room with Jo for the next week until she finds me a place of my own. Jo is ecstatic. Everything is set." Nikita declared, pushing away from him. She brushed her hair out of her eyes and added defiantly, "And George was killed in the hallway outside my room."

"How can we be sure this isn't another test?" Michael asked, not registering her last words.

"Michael, it isn't another test." Nikita declared firmly.

"How do you know?" Michael glared at her. "And how did you know he was killed in the hallway outside your room?"

Nikita smiled. Then scratched her head, looking up and thinking for a moment. "Well, lets see, could it have been the fact that he wasn't breathing? Maybe it was the fact that he had no pulse." Nikita shook her head. "No, actually I think I knew when I put the bullet in his heart. Or maybe when I put the bullet in his temple and then one through his eyes." Nikita chuckled and then shrugged. "Oh well, pick one, Michael."

Michael stared at her. What the hell was she saying? Had she killed George? Why would she do that? The Agency would kill her and then Section One!

Nikita shook her head. "The Agency isn't going to do anything to Section One or me. I made a command decision when I was sent to bring him in. I refused to bring him in alive so they could use him to play both sides. I wasn't about to risk people's lives on him. No way, no how. I gave Operations enough information to take down not only George but another Agency head as well. Let that other one play both sides!" She declared.

"Why?"

Nikita sighed. "When I was captured two months ago, it was because I was getting too close to nailing George. He was one of the founders of New Cell. Two years ago, I was transferred to the London substation to begin his take down. I was a person no one would suspect. And I am a good operative. He was also there while I was tortured. I recognized his voice easily from all the surveillance I had done on him." She explained.

"That is what you meant when you said I didn't have all the details about the mission before you were captured. And why you asked Madeline to lie to us if you were captured- you didn't know if you would be back." Michael whispered with understanding.

Nikita shook her head no. "No, the reason I told Madeline to lie to you all was because I did not want you going out to look for me and getting canceled or captured yourself. Besides, you were needed here. I may not agree with all of Section One policies, but I am beginning to rationalize them a little better. You saved people while I was captured. You must not forget that, Michael."

Michael smiled suddenly- a full smile- that shocked Nikita.

She got over the sudden shock and smiled back at him. "Michael, one day soon, we must go out for coffee and I must talk to you."

"Very soon." Michael agreed. "I'll see you at Jo's sometime too." With a slight smile, he left her standing there.

-----------------------------------------------------

Two weeks later she was waiting for Michael to get back from an exercise at Section when the doorbell rang. Nikita looked puzzled at the door. No one knew she was there except Section. And she had just moved in a week ago. Who could it be?

Nikita got the shock of her life. "Vivian?" She whispered, shocked. Closing the door behind her, Nikita stepped out into the hall. "What are you doing here?"

"Something-" Vivian started.

Nikita cut her off. "Not here. Let me write a note for Michael and then we'll go some place more secure."

Nikita left a note to Michael telling him she would meet him the next night- something had come up, an old friend was in town for the night. Then she was leading Vivian to the park across the street.

"What is wrong? What happened to Steve?" Nikita read the pain in the older woman's eyes.

"They killed him. Some how they found us after five years and killed him. I watched them shoot him down, Nikita." Vivian whispered. Her eyes turned cold. "They will die for what they have done!" She vowed. Nikita hugged her. "Who, Vivian?" She whispered softly.

"They looked like Red Cell but Section killed them off years ago!" Vivian told her and described the men.

Nikita nodded. She knew who they were. "Vivian, don't resurrect Natasha. I will take care of these people."

"Nikita, I have to take care of this myself." Vivian shook her head. Nikita hated to play her trump card when the woman was so hurt, but she had another to think of as well. "If you take care of these men, you will destroy him." She whispered.

Vivian pulled back from the younger woman. "He doesn't have to know."

"He will find out, Vivian. New Cell, the men you described, is Section One's highest priority at the moment. It would take too long to go into detail on why, but they are. He would know before you finished the first hit. Please, Vivian, let me do this." Nikita pleaded. "Don't destroy what is left of him."

Vivian stared at her. "You love him."

Nikita laughed harshly. "Love is not what I feel for the man. I have wanted to kill him more than I admit to myself. He has made my life hell. But I have begun to understand him and his actions. He cares, that I know, or he wouldn't have saved Stephen in the first place. I don't want to see him destroyed, Vivian. Section is my family now, and he is the father of Section." Vivian closed her eyes. "All right." She surrendered. "Thank you, Vivian. Now, I want you to go to a friend of mine's. She will keep you safe from Section and New Cell. And the country around her bed and breakfast is absolutely perfect to heal a wounded heart- trust me, I know." Nikita smiled and gave her Rowan's address in Ireland. Taking out a pen, she wrote a note to Rowan. "Give her this, Vivian, and she will help you through this."

Vivian nodded.

Nikita remained on the park bench long after Vivian had left. The doctors had told her she needed more time before she went out in the field- five weeks wasn't enough time to heal. She had argued with them and they finally told Operations she could do recon missions. She had a briefing the next morning at seven. Looks like she wasn't going to be able to go. Nikita sighed. And it looked like she was going to have to put off talking with Michael again.

"Where the hell have you been?" Operations demanded as soon as she walked into Section One at eight thirty the next morning.

It was the wrong thing to do. Nikita was livid from other events from earlier in the morning- she didn't need Operations jumping on her now too! Her look would have frozen the sun. Very quietly, with a strength that belied her anger, she actually ordered, "Your office, now!"

Operations was testy, though, too. Until he looked into her eyes and saw certain death in them. Not even Michael had been that cold before. He silently nodded and headed up to his office with her following in his wake.

Birkoff stared at Walter. Walter stared at Madeline. Madeline would have stared at Michael, but he was out on a mission with Jo. No one knew what was going on.

---------------------------------------------

"What the hell are you saying?" Operations demanded. It was his turn to be livid, twenty minutes later.

"I am saying that I have to have the next month off!" Nikita almost shouted. He was testing her nerves.

"No, what you are saying is that you are going to go after New Cell on your own! I won't have my operatives freelancing or becoming loose cannons!" Operations yelled.

Nikita opened her mouth to say something, then thought better of it. She closed her eyes, reached inside herself for control and took deep breaths until she found it. When she opened her eyes again, they were calm and she spoke softly. "Operations. I have no choice. I have to do this. New Cell must be destroyed. They not only have knowledge of Section One, they are Red Cell members that George saved years ago. This has nothing to do about my torture anymore, Operations. This has nothing to do with Section One or the Agency or even George. This has to do about a friend they killed."

Operations stared at her. She had come along way since being a new recruit. In the old days she would have stormed out of the office within the first minute- not that she would have dared to have been even ten minutes late to briefings! He studied her before he spoke- quietly. "I will give you three weeks. It is all I can give you with a guarantee that Michael will not know. I have a recon position you can use to cover your movements. It is one that allows for no contact with Section for three weeks." He handed her a file.

Nikita bowed her head. "Thank you, Operations." She stood and took the file.

She was at the door when he asked her, "Who did they kill that you would risk your life for?"

She turned to face him before she answered. "Just a man I knew for a few days, Operations. Just a man." Then she was gone- walking out of Section, leaving her friends wondering what the hell was going on.

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"Where did Nikita go?" Madeline asked over lunch later that day.

"She went on a recon mission." Operations sighed. "She had some business to take care of and needed some weeks away. She fit perfectly for a recon mission where we could have no contact with her. She doesn't want to worry Michael with just disappearing. One of her friends is in trouble."

Madeline studied him and nodded. She ate a bite of her salad before she stated. "She went after New Cell on her own. How long did you give her?"

Operations allowed the corners of his mouth to turn up slightly- good old Madeline! "Three weeks but it won't take that long. I told her where most of the people were that we know of thanks to George's partner."

---------------------------------------------

"She was late to a briefing? Then she just walked out of Section One and hasn't been seen in two days?" Michael was in shock. What the hell had Nikita been thinking? What was Operations going to do to her when she returned.

"He sent her on a recon mission for the next three weeks. We cannot contact her without compromising her." Madeline explained to Nikita's three Section friends.

"Why was she so late?" Birkoff asked.

Madeline chuckled before she turned serious. "I have no idea. I just know that Operations will not punish her when she returns."

Michael worried for the next four days- until he and Josephine were sent on a mission. Then he fell into his machine persona and carried out the mission.

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"I want you in the briefing room in five minutes, Michael." Operations stopped Michael as soon as he and the team returned after the three day mission. "You as well, Josephine."

Jo looked up at Michael. What was going on?

Michael didn't give anything away- he never even glanced in her direction. He had a feeling this would be about Nikita.

"You two along with Birkoff and Walter will be meeting up with a third operative on sight. That operative will give you the finer details of the plan. For right now, the basic plan is a simple intrusion and take out. You three will go in to an farmhouse in Cap aux Meules, Quebec. It is on the Ile du Cap aux Meules, in the Gulf of At Lawrence with a population just over a thousand. The island is small. The third operative is all ready there, setting up. She will find you when you take the ferry out." Operations briefed them.

"Ferry?" Josephine questioned.

"Ferry. It is the safest way to the island." Birkoff answered that question.

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Michael studied the mission profile on the flight to Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island, while Josephine caught up on her rest. Birkoff went over the SIMM for the mission while Walter checked his gear.

On the ferry, Josephine noted ironically that she was seeing more of the world than she had ever imagined. She smiled at the thought that she was finding it easier to see some good points about Section One life.

Michael stared blankly at the water, his mind far away, thinking of Nikita, wondering how her recon mission was going and if she was okay.

--------------------------------------------

Birkoff stared at the woman who met them. She was no one any had seen before but she was vaguely familiar. And she was, well. . . homely! Not at all a person Section One, with its exotic beauties, would normally recruit for field work. He briefly wondered what she had done to get recruited into Section One.

The operative lead them through the small port to a carriage of all things! Then she drove them out of the town a few miles to a beautiful old sea captain's house. Michael noted the Widow's Walk and wondered briefly how far you could see from it.

"You can see to the Ile Anticosti on a clear day." The operative noticed Michael's glance at the widow's walk.

Michael gave no response.

"Make yourselves comfortable. We won't go in for two days." The operative informed them. When Michael looked up sharply, she continued. "I'll explain in a minute, first I need to get out of this outfit." And she glided out of the room before anyone could object.

When she returned, Josephine and Walter laughed heartily. Birkoff's eyes were wide with shock. Michael stood there without any reaction. Nikita sighed. "The two of the top Legion men will be there in two days. We will strike then. Besides, they are on alert at the moment. This morning I had no choice but to take out three operatives. They were snooping too close to my beach." Nikita smiled. The death in her eyes worrying Michael.

Jo asked Birkoff if he wanted to go for a walk to get acquainted with the area. Walter spotted the surf fishing gear and headed for the beach, leaving Michael and Nikita alone.

They stared at each other, neither knowing where to start.

Nikita spoke first. "Sit, Michael, and I will explain." She motioned him to the chair on the back deck opposite her. She waited until he was seated and looking at her before she began. "Remember five years ago, when I allowed the leader of that women's militia group to go free? And made you tell Operations that she was dead?" Michael nodded and Nikita continued. "I had given her an address to go to- the child she had lost to the system many years ago. They reunited and lived normally for five years. Vivian found me eight days ago and told me a group had found her and killed her child. She watched them gun the man down. She was ready to resurrect Natasha. I convinced her to allow me to deal with the group. New Cell is that group, Michael. It took a lot to convince Operations to allow me to do this on my own for now."

Michael nodded. "The three you took out this morning. They were the ones that killed the man?"

Nikita nodded. "I keep lying to you, Michael, and I am sorry for that. But this was my fight and I needed to do it on my own."

Michael nodded again. "You have always taken care of your friends." Nikita shivered. His tone was distant and he didn't look her in the eye. Silently, she got up and walked inside. There was not much she could do. Until he approached her, she could not break down his walls. And she knew that he would never approach her, Section life had taught him well- show no emotion, let nothing control you save yourself. She contented herself with stolen glances and preparations for the invasion.

------------------------------------------

She smiled at the ease of the entry. It wasn't easy, but it certainly wasn't the most difficult one she and Michael had been sent in on! She was point, observing, as Michael and Josephine planted the explosions. She watched as Josephine was the first to retreat, then Michael.

Nikita froze. Michael was half way through the open area when the guard showed up. She looked at Josephine, but she was watching the other direction. Nikita swore and moved in a flash. With one hand, she was letting the Chinese star fly, with her legs, she was running interference between Michael and the gun. Her chest stopped the bullet that would have hit Michael, as he crouched and moved, in the head.

Michael turned and blinked. Not even looking to see if there were more guards, he went to Nikita's body.

Walter and Josephine provided cover as Michael carried Nikita to the van. As soon as they were a good distance from the farmhouse, Birkoff triggered the charges.

Michael had Nikita in the van and was treating her as Walter drove off. Josephine helped Michael when she could while Birkoff got an uplink with Section and requested a helicopter.

Two hours later, they were loading Nikita into the helo and were taking off again. She was stable but critical. The bullet was still inside her and she was unconscious.

Josephine was the first to hear it. They were half way to Section One when she heard the mumble. Bending down to Nikita's mouth, she could barely make out the name of Michael. Josephine smiled and whispered, "You saved him. I am sorry I didn't see the guy."

Nikita smiled quickly as Josephine turned to get Michael's attention. With Michael's head bent close to her, she whispered. "I never stopped loving you. A woman's strength is in her love and forgiveness. Is a man's?"

Michael's eyes pooled with tears, remembering the conversation they had had after the Natasha mission on her balcony. "No, my strength is you. My forgiveness and love are my greatest gifts." And he smiled fully for her.

Nikita smiled back just before she slipped into unconsciousness again.

"Michael, get me the hell out of here!" Nikita demanded two weeks later. The surgery when they had landed at Section had removed the bullet and repaired the damage. She had been recovering in Medlab for the two weeks and she was sick of the place. "If you don't get me the hell out of here, I will shoot someone!"

Michael chuckled. "All in good time, Nikita. The doctor has to check you out today and then we shall see." He didn't tell her that she would be moving to Section quarters later this afternoon, where she would remain for two weeks before she would be allowed to return to her apartment where Josephine would be staying with her for a week. She would find out soon enough.

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Operations was the first one to see her when they brought her to her new Section quarters. He knocked, then entered.

Nikita sighed. "I am fine. Will you people leave me alone? I just got in here!"

Operations allowed a rare smile. "Nikita, have you heard from Stephen since he gave you the photo five years ago?"

Nikita stared at him. Why was he bringing up the subject of his son now? "No, I haven't. Why? Is something wrong?"

"Just a feeling of unease." Operations shrugged it off.

Nikita closed her eyes. "Wait, Operations." She caught him at the door. "The man New Cell killed was Stephen." She whispered.

He stared at her. "Was he-?"

"No, he was never captured. It was a gunning down. He was leading a normal quiet life when it happened. He never knew what hit him." Nikita shook her head quickly. "Operations, George lead them to him. I don't know how. I didn't even know where he was!"

Operations nodded. "Thank you for telling me."

Before he left, she told him, "Let Madeline help you over this, Operations." Nikita closed her eyes and rubbed her face. She wished she could have broken it to him easier, taken some of his pain, but he would have to deal with the loss in his own way and hopefully with Madeline's help.

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"You look wasted, Nikita. Are you all right? Maybe this move was too soon." Michael saw how pale she was when he came to visit her about an hour after Operations had left.

"I'm fine. The move wasn't too soon, Michael." Nikita sighed. "I just told Operations about his son." Nikita whispered. Her tears ran down her cheeks as she continued, "He was the one who was killed by New Cell. The one I had to revenge."

Michael closed his eyes, remembering his own pain when Operations had told him his son was dead. And the joy he had felt when Nikita had shown him his son was alive. "It is hard, but he is strong." Michael squeezed her hand gently.

"I know. I hope he turns to Madeline with his feelings. He will need her to get through this." Nikita whispered.

It hit Michael then. "That would make-"

But Nikita cut him off. "If you breath a word of that to anyone, I will cancel you myself, Michael. No one, and I mean no one, is to know of that. Especially right now!"

Michael stared at her, the conviction as well as the threat surprising him. He nodded.

"I sent her to Rowan's. Rowan will help her over the loss. As will the countryside." Nikita smiled. "Ireland has the tendency to heal broken hearts."

Michael agreed. "It's a magical place."

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It was over a year later and Nikita was happily back in the field. SHe and Michael still made the best team together. Her new style to lead teams and profile missions complimented Michael's style, giving their missions a high success rate and low injury rate that Nikita was proud of. She enjoyed working with Josephine and the two operatives had gotten close- as close as they could while protecting themselves.

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The doorbell surprised Nikita. Her dinner guests shouldn't arrive for another half hour. Opening the door, she found Michael.

"Hello, Michael. What are you doing in this neck of the woods?" Nikita smiled but didn't invite him in.

"I was wondering what you were doing for dinner." Michael told her softly.

Nikita glanced back at the table that was set and muttered "Screw it" to herself. "Come on in, Michael. You know where the plates and stuff are, set another place." And she opened the door to allow him in.

Michael looked questioningly at her. "Uh, that's all right. I can take a raincheck. You have plans." And he turned to leave.

Nikita caught his arm. "Michael, come in here!" She ordered with a smile.

Michael studied her for a moment before he complied.

"Now set a place for yourself and I promise that you won't regret staying in a half an hour!" Nikita laughed and went to her stereo. God how she loved music! Picking out one CD, she selected a song.

*****She plays her cards close to the vest

**To hide the heart she wears on her sleeve

**Sometimes she's caught between the woman that she is

**And the one she's expected to be

**But with an innocent smile

**And the soul of a child

**She's always giving more than she can

**When a woman loves a man

**When a woman loves a man

**She knows how to hang on your every word

**And she knows how to look way

**She'll whisper to you what no man ever heard

**Secrets she would never give away

**With her arms open wide

**She'll take you inside

**And hold you in the palm of her hand

**When a woman loves a man

**When a woman loves a man

**She will be there to the end

**When a woman loves a man

**And when all you've got to give her

**Is nothing more than a dream

**She'll sacrifice for love to prove to you

**Her mind's made up

**To stand by you through everything

**When a woman loves a man

**When a woman loves a man

**She will be there to the end

*****When a woman loves a man.

Michael smiled as he watched Nikita lay out the table and sing along as he listened to the words. When the next song came on, a different CD, Michael laughed. "You don't own me" blasted out of her speakers after she turned up the volume, and Nikita looked at Michael and sang right along.

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The music mood she set for the dinner was a soft Celtic mood. It was relaxing her when the doorbell rang, signaling the first of her guest.

She smoothed her dress before opening the door with a smile. "Rowan, Vivian, I'm glad you agreed to do this." And she let to two women enter.

Michael stared at them before he moved to hug Rowan. "What is going on?"

Nikita gave a nervous chuckle before she answered. "Hopefully, this will help Operations. If not, it will be a great test on my nerves."

Rowan smiled. And Vivian reassured her. "Maybe it is time, Nikita, dear, for him to know that I am okay and that I don't blame him for Stephen's death. But he must not know about Natasha."

Nikita smiled. "He won't." Taking a deep breath to brace herself, she went to answer the door again. "Madeline, Operations, I am glad you made it. Everyone else is here."

Madeline gave her an encouraging smile and Nikita caught the hope in the older woman's eyes.

"Operations, Madeline, I'd like to introduce Vivian." Nikita motioned to Vivian.

Operations froze, recognizing the woman instantly.

No one spoke a word. No one moved.

Until Nikita broke the spell by stepping over to Operations. "I know that you are feeling betrayed right now, why have I brought your past back to haunt you, especially now. All I can say is that Madeline and I are worried about you." Nikita took exhaled a deep breath before she continued. "I didn't want to do this. I told myself that it would e better to leave Vivian out of the picture where you were concerned. But it's been over a year and you still are holding the pain inside yourself. It has to stop, Operations. You cannot go on like this and neither can Section One. Your leadership ability has not deteriorated but your decisions have. You no longer take some of the risks you once did. My god! Michael and I are more advisory than ever! I've gone out in the field four times since I was pronounced fit for cold ops again! Michael has only gone out in the field ten times, remaining more in the planning stages!" Nikita paused, trying to find the right words to get her point across. "I'm not one for advocating more force but, Operations, Section One needs to be more forceful!"

Operations stared at the young blonde in front of him. He remembered her saving his son and asking for the one thing he couldn't give her. He remembered her taking a mission to protect Michael's son, a mission that not only involved lying to Michael but severe torture as well. He remembered her giving him the picture of his wife and son from so long ago. He remembered her taking the long undercover operation to take down George and going through the torture of being captured. He remembered his anger at not being able to find her and the relief when Michael and Josephine had stumbled across her. Then finally, he remembered her explaining why she had gone after New Cell on her own- to revenge the killing of his son. She put her life above others, even after what Section One, and he, had done to her. Now she was trying to help him over his grief.

Then he turned to Madeline. She had seen him through so much of his Section career. She had been there for him before he got Section One, helped him through the pain of the beginning decisions, and through the rigors of running Section One now. Her strength was what kept him going half the time. He didn't know what he would do without her.

Studying Michael, Operations smiled. He was the younger version of himself. Cold and detached but feeling more than anyone else.

And Rowan, she had been the one to help him solve the problem of Michael's son. She was a good friend, helping Section when he asked her to.

Finally, he turned to his past, his wife, Vivian. She had loved him, and he her so long ago. But that man was dead. He saw the understanding in Vivian's eyes and went to her. He hugged her and whispered he was sorry.

Nikita slumped with relief and a smile. Madeline and Rowan both went over to her and the three of them shared a smile and a group hug. It wouldn't be the same as before. Things would change- and that was all that they had wanted.

Michael watched Nikita with a smile. Even in the darkness, she found a way to light up everyone around her. Her greatest gift was the joy and light she brought to everyone who knew her. And he thanked God, there had to be one, for allowing her to come into his life.

Vivian hugged him tightly, her tears running down her cheeks. "It wasn't your fault."

Operations pulled back from her, squeezed her hand then went to Madeline's side and smiled down on her. "Thank you." He whispered.

"All right! Enough sadness! It is time to chow!" Rowan's voice boomed through the room.

Nikita laughed, walked over to the stereo and put in a more lively Celtic CD.

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Michael was the last to leave. He helped her with the dishes and was content to just be with her. He listened to her hum along with the new CD she put in as she washed the dessert dishes.

"Michael, do you think that you will ever be able to smile more often?" Nikita asked suddenly.

Michael looked at her sharply. What was she getting at? "Why?" He asked, almost hesitantly.

"Well, I was wondering, that's all!" And Nikita flicked a patch of soap bubbles at him, laughter in her eyes.

Michael grinned. Nikita would be Nikita, there was no use tying to figure her out. "With you around, Nikita, I will." And he tossed some bubbles back at her.

The next thing Nikita knew, they were both soaking wet and laughing so hard, they were holding their stomachs.

It was nice to hear him laugh.

Twenty minutes later, Nikita was opening the door for him. "Don't be a stranger, Michael. Good night."

Michael smiled, reached up and caressed her cheek. "Sweet dreams, Nikita." Then he was gone.

The End